


I Remember...

by DonnieTheFu



Series: Little Freddie [8]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Freddie Has Kids, Cute, Drama, Drunken Shenanigans, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Family Bonding, Family Drama, Father-Son Relationship, Flashbacks, Fluff, Freddie is such a good daddy and a good boyfriend to Jim, Friendship, Gen, Happy Ending, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Past Rape/Non-con, Period-Typical Homophobia, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Religious Content - Christianity & Zoroastrianism, Repressed Memories, Sad, Sexual Violence, Spanking, Sweet, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Underage Rape/Non-con, Vacation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 10:21:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 47,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22848589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DonnieTheFu/pseuds/DonnieTheFu
Summary: Freddie reluctantly agrees, at the insistence of his parents and sister, to return to Zanzibar and India for a family holiday so that Little Freddie and Kashmira can learn more about their Parsi culture. But amidst the fun and excitement, when painful memories start to surface, things perhaps better left forgotten, can Brian, Roger, John, and Jim help replace the bad times with good?***Chapter 8 is the only explicit chapter, and the explicit parts are clearly marked with *** symbols at the beginning and end, and are also in italics font, so you can skip past them if you would prefer not to read them. They can be skipped and the story still understood without reading them. It is something that supposedly really happened to Freddie when he was fourteen-years-old at St. Peter's boarding school according to the book Freddie Mercury by David Bret.***
Relationships: Jim Hutton/Freddie Mercury, John Deacon & Brian May & Freddie Mercury & Roger Taylor, Mary Austin & Freddie Mercury
Series: Little Freddie [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1526273
Comments: 73
Kudos: 32





	1. An Unexpected Holiday

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lorie1483](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lorie1483/gifts).



> This is for Lorie1483. Thank you so much for the wonderful idea that inspired this story 💖
> 
> I would really appreciate no criticism (constructive or otherwise), or negativity in the comments section, please. This is just my hobby that I do for fun. Thank you! :)
> 
> Copyright © May 20, 2020 DonnieTheFu All Rights Reserved
> 
> ***DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Any semblance between original characters and real persons, living or dead, is coincidental. The author in no way represents the companies, corporations, or brands mentioned in this work. The likeness of historical/famous figures have been used fictitiously; the author does not speak for or represent these people. All opinions expressed in this work are the author’s, or fictional.***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is for Lorie1483. Thank you so much for the wonderful idea that inspired this story 💖

**July 1985 - Feltham, England**

The Thursday after Live Aid, Freddie and the children stood outside his parents' small, terraced home in Feltham. When he was in London, Freddie saw them every week, on Thursday, and Mary and the children came along as well; and when he was away, Mary brought the children by herself. But Mary couldn't make it today, so Freddie and the children were on their own, which automatically made Freddie more nervous than usual, though he always got a bit uptight about these visits, no matter how often they occurred. When Mary was with him, certain questions might not be asked of him, and she had always been good at diffusing tricky situations.

"Right," Freddie said to the children, beginning the same speech he gave every week. "You're to be on your best behaviour. And you may have one sweet. Don't ask for anything else."

"Yes, Daddy," Little Freddie and Kashmira answered together.

"Ok." Freddie took Kashmira by the hand, and they all walked up to the front door. He took a deep breath, and then knocked. Voices could be heard inside, and then the sound of footsteps as they made their way towards the front door. He was much relieved when the door opened and there stood his sister, Kash. If Mary couldn't be here, at least he had her.

"Freddie," she smiled, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Hello, Kash," Freddie said, returning her embrace and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Auntie Kash!" the children cried, swarming her when their father stepped back.

"Ohhh!" She gathered them both tightly in her arms. "My babies! You must stop all this growing! You're getting too big!" she said, tenderly smoothing Little Freddie's hair back from his forehead. "Well, come inside," she said at last, stepping back. Freddie and the children passed inside, and she closed the door behind them.

" _Beta_!" his mother called to him affectionately, as Freddie stepped into the sitting room. He crossed the room to where his mother and father sat in their chairs side by side.

"Mama." He bent down to hug and kiss her.

"Farrokh," his father said his name by way of greeting. Always Farrokh, never Freddie.

"Papa," Freddie said in return with a curt nod.

" _Beta,_ " his mother said to him, a hand against his cheek. "We're so sorry we couldn't make it to the concert," she apologized again. "It was such a huge event, it would have been too complicated for us - the crowds and getting to and from the stadium. But you know we watched it all on television. And we're both so proud of you. We both turned to each other and said, 'Our boy’s done it.'" 

Freddie took her hand and kissed the palm. "Thank you, Mama," he said.

" _Dādī_!" Little Freddie and Kashmira shouted, practically shoving Freddie out of the way to get to their grandmother. She laughed, hugging them close. "Mārā kimmatī pautrō kēvī chē?" (How are my precious grandchildren?)

"Sāruṁ (Good)," they both answered back politely.

Just then Bomi coughed pointedly to get their attention.

"Dādā!" They both turned and ran over to hug him as well.

As he watched, Freddie felt a familiar pang, and wondered, not for the first time, what it would have been like had he and Kash been shown the sort of love and attention his parents now showered on their grandchildren. His parents had been reserved and undemonstrative, and there had been little in the way of physical contact between them and their children. When the family still lived in Zanzibar, the children were cared for day to day by a nanny, Sabine. And while neither Freddie nor Kash were ever chastised with beatings, they were never cuddled much either. Later, when Freddie was sent to boarding school at only the tender age of eight, he'd hardly seen them at all after that - except for one month during the summer, and sometimes not even then, instead spending the break at school or with an elderly aunt, either his paternal aunt Jer or his maternal aunt Sheroo, in Bombay, India...

A while later, Little Freddie and Kashmira sat on the floor, playing quietly with their cousins, Natalie and Sam (Kash's children), while the adults sat and talked nearby.

"So, Farrokh..." his father said. His father wasn't much for speaking, he mostly left the talking up to Freddie's mother and sister, and would sit quietly by listening to everything that was said. So when he did make the occasional comment, Freddie always sat up, and paid close attention. "What are you doing now? Will you and the band be touring again soon?"

"No, no touring at the moment," Freddie answered. "We'd need to make another album first before we do that, you see. We've already talked about going back into the studio to do one in September. But for right now, for the next several weeks at least, we're just having a bit of rest, I suppose." 

"Well you deserve it, _beta_ ," his mother told him. "You've been working so hard lately."

"Hmm," his father said. "And I suppose the children will be out of school soon for the summer break?"

"Yes, I believe so," Freddie answered. "I think this is the last week. They go to an independent (private) school, you know. So the timing of the breaks and holidays are sometimes slightly different from the state (public) schools."

Little Freddie and Kashmira both came over then for the one piece of _mithai_ (sweet) they were allowed, but by that time, there was only one piece of _kulfi_ left. _Kulfi_ was a frozen ground almond dessert, served in many Indian restaurants, and which Phoebe himself had attempted to make a few times at Garden Lodge, with disastrous, albeit hilarious results. Instead of snatching up the last piece for himself, as many older brothers, or Little Freddie himself might have done at a different time, instead he took the last piece and gave it to his little sister.

"Here, Kash," he said, handing her the sweet.

"Come here, young man," his grandfather said then, beckoning him with a finger. Little Freddie approached, and Bomi put his arm around him. "Good thoughts, good words, good deeds," he said, touching Little Freddie's head, mouth, and lastly heart, as he repeated the mantra. Then he produced another piece of _kulfi_ from a plate nearby, and gave it to him. "Do you know who said that?" 

Little Freddie shook his head.

"It was a very wise man, a prophet named, Zoroaster, who lived a very long time ago, in a faraway land called Persia," Bomi began. Then he turned to Freddie. "Farrokh, you know our religion can only be passed down from father to son," he said. "You were only eight, when you took part in the _navjote_ (fire ceremony)."

"Was I?" Freddie asked dismissively.

Bomi frowned. "Pardon me for being concerned about my grandchildren's religious education."

"Don't worry, Papa," Freddie said to him, still with that same dismissive air. "I make sure they say their prayers before bedtime."

"To whom?"

"To God, Papa," Freddie told him.

"Ah. But which one?" They sat staring silently at each other, hard looks etched on both their faces.

Kash popped her head into the room from the kitchen. "Dinner's ready," she said with a smile.

*******

"Sit up straight, and elbows off the table," Freddie told Little Freddie, who complied.

"You know, _beta,_ " his mother said to him as they ate her version of chicken pie, which Freddie had always adored and loved, and which contained sausages and baked beans as well as chicken in a white sauce under a wonderful golden brown crust of puff pastry. "Your father and I have been thinking of taking a holiday, and we'd love for you and Kashi and the children to all come along as well."

"Really?" Freddie said. This was certainly news to him. "Where to?"

"Back to Zanzibar and India," his mother said as casually as if she'd said to the park for a picnic.

"Zanzibar!" Freddie nearly spat out his tea. "No, no," he said with a shake of his head. "It's far too dangerous." His mother must have gone mad to even think of suggesting such a thing.

"It was," Bomi conceded. "But that was twenty years ago. It's really quite safe now, from what we've heard."

"I still don't think it's a good idea," Freddie said.

"You're probably right, _beta,_ " she said, a sad look clouding her face. "I just wanted to teach the grandchildren about their Parsi culture, and to see it again myself one last time before I die."

Freddie put his fork down and looked at Kash, cocking his head to the side. He ought to have known his mother would play that card to try and get him to go.

"Well, I think it's a lovely idea, Mama. I'm sure all the children would love to go," Kash said, trying to hide an amused smile behind her napkin as she looked at Freddie.

"The only problem is, your father and I are getting on in years, as you know. We could never manage to do it on our own," his mother continued.

"If you were to agree to go, _Freddie,_ " his father said, albeit with an obvious struggle of will. "Perhaps you might like to invite Roger, Brian, and John along as well. It might be nice to have friends around to relive old times," he said. "And maybe you'd like to invite your um... _gardener_ along as well."

"The-the gardener?" Freddie asked, completely shocked.

"You mean, Papa Jim?" Kashmira asked her grandfather, as Freddie choked on his pie.

"Yes, he seems like a nice enough fellow. I'm sure he'd like to come along, if you were to ask him," Bomi said.

"Well, I'd have to ask them first, to see if they even wanted to come," Freddie said, once he'd recovered. "And Mary. Of course, I'd want her to come as well."

"Sure, _beta_ ," his mother smiled, patting his hand. "You'll let us know what they say, hmm?"

*******

If Freddie had perhaps been hoping one of the others would talk him out of it, he was sorely disappointed.

"I think it's a wonderful opportunity for the children to see where their roots lie and where their heritage comes from," Mary said.

"When do we leave?" Jim asked, smiling. "I've always wanted to know more about what you were like as a boy."

And Brian and the others weren't much help either.

"That's great, Freddie!" Brian beamed. "It sounds like it would be a lot of fun."

"And er, very educational," John added with a grin.

"But are you sure you want us to come with you?" Brian asked. "We wouldn't want to sort of intrude on your family holiday."

"Of course, I'm sure, darling," Freddie told him. "There's family and then there's _family_." He gave them a sincere look, and nodded his head. "I want you all with me."

"Well of course we'll come, Freddie," Brian said, putting a hand on his arm. "Wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Yeah, mate," Roger said with a smile. "The sun, beaches, exotic women...What's not to love?"


	2. Yellow Fever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As they prepare for their holiday to Zanzibar and India, Freddie has to take Little Freddie & Kashmira for the required blood test and yellow fever vaccination prior to their entrance into the countries

Straightway the next morning, Freddie commissioned Phoebe to begin making arrangements for the holiday with instructions that no expense be spared - five stars all the way. He was going to give his parents the holiday of a lifetime. Because despite the shortcomings or mistakes they may have made as parents when he was younger, nobody could say Freddie had ever been anything less than a caring loving son. He knew he himself was far from being the perfect parent, and that they had only done what they had done, sending him away to boarding school, because they wanted to give him the best future as possible, and had sacrificed a great deal to do so. And perhaps this holiday might go a short way towards repaying them.

"Shall I make reservations for Liza (Joe) and me as well?" Phoebe had asked, trying not to get his hopes up too high. He had also gone to boarding school in India, and had friends there he hadn't seen in years, and would quite enjoy catching up with.

"Just for you, dear," Freddie answered. "I've already spoken to Liza, and he's graciously agreed to stay behind and look after the cats. He said he's got no real interest to go to Zanzibar and India anyway. And he'll have the whole house all to himself while we're away. I've given him full reign to do as he pleases, so in a funny way, he's getting a holiday too. And I've promised him he's to have his own proper holiday when we return."

"Oh, thank you so much, Freddie," Phoebe gushed. "I really can't tell you how much I appreciate this."

"Of course, dear. You know I wouldn't be able to do any of this on my own anyway," Freddie said. "You might also check with Crystal and Jobby to coordinate the arrangements for Brian, Roger, and John," he added.

"Of course, Freddie," Phoebe said, practically glowing now with enthusiasm. "I'll phone them right away." So Phoebe worked feverishly the rest of the day, and surprised even himself at how quickly he was able to make all the arrangements. There was only one slight problem, which he mentioned to Freddie later that afternoon.

“There’s just one little, tiny issue,” Phoebe said.

“Yes, dear, what is it?” Freddie asked.

“It seems a yellow fever vaccine and a blood test for any communicable diseases is required at least ten days prior to entrance into Zanzibar and India as well,” Phoebe informed him. “I know you and I have already had our yellow fever vaccine as children, but what about Little Freddie, Kashmira, and Jim?”

“No,” Freddie shook his head. “Oh, dear,” he sighed. “Well, I suppose there’s no other way around it, is there?”

“I’m afraid not,” Phoebe told him.

“Right,” Freddie said. “I know tomorrow’s Saturday and the weekend, but suppose you phone Dr. Atkinson and see if he might be willing to see us early tomorrow morning for an appointment at his surgery. Tell him it would be a huge personal favor for me, if he’d be willing to do it, and that I’d appreciate it tremendously. And of course I’ll make sure he’s very well compensated for his troubles.” Dr. Gordon Atkinson, who owned a clinic over on London's famous Harley Street, had been Freddie’s personal physician, and close friend, for many years, and was always willing to go completely out of his way to accommodate Freddie in any way that he possibly could, should Freddie need him.

So Phoebe phoned and was able to secure an appointment for 5:30 A.M. the next morning. All of Freddie’s appointments had to be done very early that way, when as few people as possible were around to see him going in there, otherwise they risked being overrun by fanatic fans and prying paparazzi.

Later, Freddie spoke with Jim who confirmed he’d never had the yellow fever vaccine before. ‘Right. Well, I’ve made you all an appointment with my personal physician, Dr. Atkinson, for tomorrow morning at 5:30 A.M. to get your blood test and yellow fever vaccine. I hope you don’t mind. I suppose I really should have asked you first. You might have wanted to use your own doctor. Sorry,” he apologized.

“No, no. There’s no need to apologize, Freddie. That’s perfectly fine. Thank you,” Jim said with a nervous smile, hands clasped behind his back. Thankfully Freddie hadn’t seemed to notice, nor that at the very mention of the word “vaccine”, Jim’s hands had begun to tremble. He’d also begun to get a bit of a queasy stomach as well.

Then Freddie sent Phoebe and Joe to Harrods to buy Little Freddie and Kashmira a gift that he hoped would make breaking the unfortunate news a bit easier. For Kashmira, he told them to buy the best pretend doctor’s kit they could find for little girls, and if they could find one, a children’s picture book about going to the doctor’s and getting a shot, or whatever. And for Little Freddie, a new Transformer toy, if they could find one he didn’t already have. 

“I think there’s a new one he’s been wanting called Optimus something-or-other,” Freddie said dismissively, with a wave of his hand. 

“Optimus Prime?!” Joe asked, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. He often (quite willingly) played transformers with Little Freddie if Little Freddie didn’t have anyone else to play with.

“Yes, I believe that’s it,” Freddie said. “See if you can find one of those.”

*******

That night at dinner, Jim didn’t really feel like eating, and instead just pushed it around on his plate. This time Freddie did notice.

“What’s the matter, darling? You’re not hungry?” he asked.

“No, not really,” Jim said. “I-I had a big lunch.”

Freddie himself was avoiding telling Little Freddie and Kashmira, until at last, it couldn’t wait any longer.

“Listen,” he said when they were in the sitting room after dinner. “We’ve got to go tomorrow and have a check-up with Dr. Atkinson before we can go on our holiday to Zanzibar and India.”

This announcement was met with a long silence, but at last Little Freddie spoke up. “Do we…do we have to get a shot?” he asked.

“Yes, I'm afraid so,” Freddie told them. “And a blood test.” At which Kashmira immediately began to cry.

“Don’t cry, darling,” Freddie told her. “Why don’t you and Freddie go have a look in the wardrobe (closet) over there, and see what you find, hmm?”

That halted the tears, as Little Freddie and Kashmira both ran over to the hall wardrobe, and opened the door.

“Oh, it’s Optimus Prime!” Little Freddie shouted excitedly. "Thank you, Daddy! Thank you!"

Kashmira brought her gifts over to her father. “What is it?” she asked.

“Well, this is a story for us to read together later at bedtime,” he said, pointing to the book. “And this is something for us to practice with.” He helped her open the kit. “Here. You be the doctor,” he said, putting the little doctor’s coat on her that had come with the kit, and the little pink stethoscope around her neck. “And we’ll be your patients,” he said. Then they all let Kashmira pretend to take a blood sample and give them an injection, even Phoebe and Joe, who played along. Though Jim remained conspicuously absent in the kitchen. “Now, we’ll do you,” Freddie said. He took the doctor’s coat from Kashmira, and as he obviously couldn’t wear it, he just laid it on his back, and the pink stethoscope around his neck. Then he picked Kashmira up, and sat her on the sofa. “Hello, I’m Doctor Mercury,” he said, holding out his hand.

"No, you're Doctor Daddy," Kashmira told him with a giggle. 

“Alright. And what's your name?"

“Kash,” she laughed.

“Hello, Kash. What are you in for today?”

“A shot and blood sample,” she answered. 

Then Freddie showed her just what to do when it was time for the blood sample. "Close your eyes very tight. As tight as you can," he told her. "Then when you feel the prick, you just count ONE, TWO, THREE!" they counted together. "And then when it's time for the shot- Close your eyes again," he instructed, waiting for her to comply. "And when you feel the pinch, you just say OW!" he told her, depressing the pretend plunger.

"OW!" Kashmira repeated.

"And then it's all over," Freddie told her. "It's just as easy as that, darling." Then he handed her a lolly and a sticker. "And a lolly and a sticker at the end," he said. Then Freddie had to pretend to do the same to Phoebe and Joe of course.

And at bedtime they read the book together that Phoebe and Joe had bought. "You see there, darling?" Freddie said at the end. "There's nothing to be scared of at all." And he gave her and Little Freddie both a kiss.

That night, no matter how hard he tried, Jim just couldn't get to sleep. He knew it would only be a little sting, but he just couldn't help it. He tossed and turned so much that he was afraid he would wake Freddie, so he got up quietly and went into the Pink Room, where he lay awake the rest of the night.

*******

The next morning, however, all the fun from the night before had been forgotten, and nerves were running high.

"Is it going to hurt?" Kashmira asked, tearfully, as Freddie helped her get dressed.

"It may hurt," Freddie answered her truthfully. "But Daddy'll be right there with you the whole time, and if it does hurt, it'll only be just for a little while."

Despite the ungodly hour, Phoebe and Joe had prepared a wonderful pancake breakfast (with smiley faces of chocolate chips for the children). But Little Freddie, Kashmira, and Jim barely ate.

Then Freddie's trusted driver, Terry, arrived to drive them to the appointment. When they arrived at the surgery, they went in through the back door, just to be extra safe, though there were no other patients except them. Little Freddie, Kashmira, and Jim sat beside each other in the waiting area, as Freddie went up to the desk to chat for a moment with Dr. Atkinson and his nurse. After a few minutes, the nurse came around the desk and walked over to Little Freddie and Kashmira.

"Hello there, my sweethearts!" she said, cheerfully, bending down towards them. "And what are your names?"

"Freddie."

"Kash."

"Freddie and Kash! What beautiful names," the nurse said. "My name's Mary."

"That's our mummy's name," Kashmira told her. 

"Is it?" the nurse, gasped. "Wow! Well, how about you both come with me, and have a look in my treasure chest." She took them both by the hand and led them into a small back room. She really did have a treasure chest, like the kind on pirate ships, only this one was filled with toys instead of treasure. She told them to pick out two prizes each. Kashmira chose a little toy ring and a bracelet, and Little Freddie picked out a bouncy ball and some jacks. Then she had them pick out two stickers, two lollies, and two plasters. Kashmira picked princesses for her stickers and plasters, and Little Freddie chose Transformers. The nurse took their selections and set them aside.

"Now then, Daddy's going to go first," she told them. "And I want you to watch Daddy, and he's going to show you how it only hurts just a tiny little bit." When Freddie had been at the desk, he had told Dr. Atkinson and the nurse to give him a blood test and injection (of sterile saline) as well, so that he could be an example to the children. Freddie laid out his arm on the arm rest. The nurse tied a rubber band tightly around his upper arm, and then swabbed the crook of his arm with a cotton ball damp with alcohol. Freddie smiled at Kashmira and gave her a wink to reassure her.

At first Kashmira was reluctant, and hung back. But then she hesitantly walked over to get a better look. 

“Would you like to hold Daddy’s hand?” the nurse asked.

Kashmira nodded her head, and reached out to take his hand. "Close your eyes, Daddy," she instructed.

So Freddie did. "Alright, they're closed," he said.

"Alright, big pinch here, Daddy," the nurse said, and Kashmira watched closely as the nurse inserted the needle gently into the vein.

"One...Two...Three!" She counted. 

The nurse removed the needle and rubber band, and Freddie opened his eyes as she applied a cotton ball and plaster over the site. Next Freddie rolled up his sleeve, and the nurse swabbed the back of his arm. 

"Close your eyes again, Daddy," Kashmira reminded him.

The nurse bunched up his arm muscle in her hand, and administered the injection.

"Ow!" Freddie said, for Kashmira's benefit.

"Ow!" she repeated.

"Oh, good job, Daddy!" the nurse praised, as she applied a plaster to Freddie's arm. Then she handed him a paper cup of water and two paracetamol tablets, which Freddie swallowed down. "To keep your arm from hurting later," the nurse told him.

Then it was Little Freddie's turn. Freddie could tell he was trying very hard to be brave, but his face turned a blotchy red, and there were tears in his eyes, although they didn't fall, as the nurse applied the rubber band and swabbed his arm. "It won't hurt, Kash," he said in a wobbly voice, though it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself than her.

"Oh, what a brave boy!" the nurse said. "I promise I'll be very gentle," she told him, knowing that sometimes older children needed reassurance too. "Big pinch here, Freddie. Big pinch!" she said, putting in the needle. "That's it! Why don't you go ahead and count for me, hmm? One...Two...Three! There now. All done!" she smiled, handing him the bouncy ball he'd picked out, along with one of the stickers and one of the lollies. And then before he even knew it, she'd already finished administering the injection as well.

"Agh!" he said at the sudden, unexpected sting.

"All done!" The nurse smiled handing him his second set of prizes. Then she gave him a dose of liquid Calpol to drink and a cup of juice to wash it down with. Little Freddie perked right up after that. 

"It hardly hurt at all Kash. You can barely feel it," he said, popping one of the lollies into his mouth. He came over and Freddie hugged him close, whispering in his ear.

"You did a really good job. I’m really proud of you. I know you were really scared, but you did it anyway. That was really brave." He smoothed his hair and gave him a smile, which Little Freddie returned, lolly still in the side of his mouth.

Last of all, it was Kashmira's turn. But by that time all of her bravery had deserted her. 

“Nooo!” She began crying and wouldn't come over, so Freddie went and picked her up and brought her over to the chair where he sat with her in his lap, and she sobbed against his chest, as he rubbed her back. He knew from personal experience that sometimes, no matter how many times you've practiced something, nerves can still get the better of you.

“It’s ok, Kash,” Little Freddie came over and rubbed her shoulders, trying to comfort her.

"How old are you, sweetheart?" the nurse asked, making small talk as she prepared the things. 

"She's five," Freddie answered for her, as Kashmira was too distraught.

"Five years old! Wow! What a big girl you are!" she said. "And I hear you're going on holiday soon! That sounds like so much fun!" Then the nurse tied the rubber band around her arm, and Kashmira began crying even harder. "It's alright, love. I'm just putting this big rubber band on, so I can get a good look at your muscles," she said, pressing on the crook of her arm to find the vein. "Now, I'm just going to clean your arm off. It might feel a little bit cold, alright?"

"I don't want to do it! I don't want to do it!" Kashmira cried. “I’m scared!” And Freddie felt his heart squeeze. He surely hoped the trip would be worth all of this.

"I know. I'm sorry, love. But I promise it’ll all be done really quickly, alright?" the nurse said. “I’m going to hold your hand, and I want you to squeeze my thumb as hard as you can, alright?” She stretched Kashmira’s arm out along the arm rest. “And you squeeze Daddy’s hand with your other hand, alright?”

“It’s alright, darling,” Freddie told her. “Remember what we practiced last night, hmm? Let’s close our eyes.” He put his hand over her eyes. “That’s it, darling. Have you got them closed?” he asked, though Kashmira didn’t answer.

“Alright, love, it’s just one stick, and it’s all done,” the nurse said. “I want you to hold really still for me, and take a big, deep breath,” she continued. “It’s just a little stick here, love, just a little stick.” 

Kashmira sobbed as she inserted the needle.

“That’s it, love! You did it! The stick’s done. The hard part’s all done now,” the nurse told her.

“It hurts!” Kashmira cried.

“I know it hurts, love. But just breathe for me, alright? I promise it’s almost done now. You’re doing so well. Such a big girl!” the nurse said. “Alright, it’s time to count now. Can you count for me? ONE…TWO…THREE!” The nurse and Freddie counted together as she removed the needle, and replaced it with a cotton ball. Freddie removed his hand from Kashmira’s eyes. “Good job! That’s it! We are all done! We are all finished! I’m just going to put a plaster on there, that’s all I’m going to do,” the nurse said, as she applied the plaster. “You were so brave! What a good girl!” She gave Kashmira a lolly, sticker (which she immediately put on her shirt), and the little ring she had picked out. 

“Ooh! Look at that!” Freddie said, examining the ring.

Kashmira turned when she felt the nurse swabbing the back of her arm.

“No. Look over there, love. Show Daddy your ring,” the nurse said, and just as quickly, she’d already finished administering the injection. Kashmira did cry after the injection, but only for a little while, because the nurse was already giving her her second lolly and sticker, and the bracelet. “Here you are, love. Drink this for me,” the nurse said afterwards, giving her the Calpol and juice. Then she turned to Freddie. “They may have some discomfort for a while and a low-grade fever, but you can give them Calpol every four to six hours, if they get to feeling yucky.” 

“Right,” Freddie said, rubbing Kashmira’s arm and giving her a kiss. “That’s ice cream for all of us.”

*******

Afterwards, they came back out to where Jim sat in the waiting area. 

"Well, I guess you're up," Freddie said to him with a smile.

"Oh. Right," Jim replied, wiping his forehead with a handkerchief. That's when Freddie noticed for the first time, that Jim was sweating bullets, great giant drops pouring down his face.

"What is it, darling?" He asked, immediately concerned. "Are you sick?"

"No, I'm fine," Jim said.

"Well, you're clearly not." Freddie sat down beside him. "What is it, darling? What's the matter? Whatever it is, just tell me."

"I..I…," Jim couldn't bring himself to say it, terrified what Freddie might think of him.

"Yes?" Freddie prodded.

"I'm scared of needles," Jim whispered, just loud enough for Freddie to hear. Scared wasn’t the word really. Terrified more like.

"Oh." Freddie said. "I never knew that! Well, is that all, darling? That's nothing to be ashamed of! I mean everyone's afraid of something. And you know how terrified I am of spiders, and you're not scared of them at all!"

Jim just nodded his head, avoiding eye contact.

"That’s why you didn’t feel like eating yesterday, isn’t it? And why you couldn’t sleep last night. You poor thing! You’ve just been suffering in silence this whole time, haven’t you?” Freddie said, to which there was no reply. “Do you...do you want me to come with you?" he asked.

But Jim shook his head. "No, I'll be alright."

Freddie gave him a sympathetic look. "Wait here," he said. He took Little Freddie and Kashmira back outside to the car, where he knew his driver, Terry, would take good care of them and they would be safe. Then he came back inside and sat down beside Jim.

Just then the nurse came back out into the waiting area. "Mr. Hutton?"

Freddie turned to Jim. "Ready?" he asked. 

Jim nodded his head.

The nurse escorted them back into the little room. "How are you today, Mr. Hutton?" she smiled. "If you'd like, you can have a seat right here in this chair for me."

But before Jim could sit down, Freddie intervened. "Oh, um, do me first," he said, sitting down in the chair, and holding out his arm, glad that he’d had the mind to rip off the plasters and throw them in the bin when Jim wasn’t looking.

The nurse looked confused for a moment, but when she and Freddie met eyes, it dawned on her what must be happening. "Oh, of course, Mr. Mercury. Just a moment."

Jim looked confused as well. "I thought you'd already got your yellow fever vaccine?" he said.

"Oh, uh, well yeah I did, but that was so long ago, the doctor suggested I have another one," Freddie told him.

"You didn't get yours done just now with the kids?"

"No, I was going to, but, uh, I was too busy trying to console Kashmira," Freddie said, hoping Jim would believe it and wouldn't ask any more questions. Thankfully he didn't.

So Freddie got his second blood draw and injection that he didn't really need.

When it was Jim’s turn, he sat down in the chair and held out his arm, then covered his eyes with his hand. Freddie could see him trembling, and the sweat still pouring down his face. He reached out and put a hand on Jim’s shoulder, squeezing it tight so that Jim would know – _I’m right here, darling. I’m right here._

“Alright, big pinch here, Mr. Hutton. Big pinch!” the nurse said…

It didn’t turn out nearly as bad as Jim had imagined it would, but then again it never did. He just always got himself so worked up, but he honestly couldn’t help it. It was just one of those things. All the same, he was glad it was over. And that Freddie hadn’t belittled or ridiculed him, when Jim had told him his fear. Not that Freddie would ever do that! But still…sometimes it’s hard to admit when you’re afraid…

“How’d it go, Freddie?” Phoebe asked upon their return to Garden Lodge.

"Well, I mean, I cried, of course," Freddie joked. "But the rest of them are as tough as nails,” he said, winking down at Kashmira.

*******

Later, as promised, Freddie took them all out for ice cream at the best ice cream parlour in all of London. Freddie watched Jim closely. He seemed much better now, but there was still something there – something still a little bit off about him, like how he’d avert his eyes quickly if he saw Freddie looking at him. And Freddie thought he knew exactly what it was. He waited until that night, when they were alone together in their bedroom.

“How’s your arm?” Freddie asked him.

“Oh, it’s fine,” Jim said, looking away again. Then they’d turned off all the lights, and lay there in bed together.

“Right, that’s it!” Freddie declared suddenly.

“What?” Jim turned to him, startled.

“I absolutely will not have you feeling ashamed or embarrassed about your fear,” he said. “It’s time for a bedtime story – so listen up!”

So Jim did.

Freddie sighed. “It’s time I told you that story I started to tell you last week.” So Freddie recounted to him the story - [about how once, a few years ago while Freddie had been temporarily living in a flat in New York while Queen were touring America, at one point he’d fallen dreadfully ill, and Brian, Roger, and John had…](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20858045/chapters/49580231)

Freddie, telling the story as only he could, had Jim in stitches of laughter. “Oh my God!” Jim guffawed at the end. “That really happened to you?!” 

“Unfortunately, it really did, darling,” Freddie said. “I swore them all to secrecy, and to their credit, they’ve never told another living soul, as far as I know. Anyway, there you have it.” Now it was Freddie’s turn to be embarrassed. He was glad it was dark, so Jim couldn’t see how much he was blushing. “Now try and beat that for embarrassment!"


	3. A Star Is Loved Everywhere, Except In His Hometown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trip to Zanzibar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added a couple of YouTube links in the text so that if you want to, you can listen to what Freddie and the others were hearing on their holiday. Maybe it will make you feel like you are on this holiday with them. I certainly did as I was writing it.

Ten days later, after everyone had been cleared, they set out for Zanzibar. The first flight was to leave out of Heathrow at 6:00 A.M.

“Hold my hand,” Freddie said, extending a hand to each of his children before they went into the airport. But Little Freddie pulled back.

“I’m eleven,” he protested, casting a glance at thirteen-year-old Felix and twelve-year-old Jimmy, who certainly weren’t being made to hold their fathers’ hands. Neither was Robert who was one year younger than he was.

“I don’t care if you’re twenty-one! You will hold my hand in this airport, Freddie Mercury!” Freddie told him, and he wasn’t exaggerating in the slightest. It was truly his greatest fear in life that one day some crazy fanatic might try and grab one of his children. He even had nightmares about it sometimes, and would wake up in a cold sweat. He could live without anything else – give up all the fame and fortune in the blink of an eye, but he could never live without his children. If it wouldn’t have looked so ridiculous, Freddie wished they could do like elephants did when lions were trying to attack them – put all the babies in the middle, and the adults form an outward facing circle around them. Though he supposed it would be rather hard to walk through the airport that way.

“Ugh! Fine,” Little Freddie said, letting his father take his hand.

“Do you want to get snatched?” Freddie asked him.

“Yes,” Little Freddie mumbled under his breath.

“Sorry, what was that?”

“No…,” Little Freddie sighed. And then, “Ow! You’re hurting my hand!”

“Oh, sorry,” Freddie apologized, loosening his grip, though only slightly.

But everything went well, and the flight was uneventful, albeit very long – eight hours and thirty-five minutes. And by the end of it Mary was ready to tear her hair out. If she had to hear one more “I need to go to the loo” or “I’m hungry” or “How much longer?” or “I’m tired” or “Are we there yet?” – she was going to go absolutely mad!

“Yes, we’re almost there!” she practically shouted. “Honestly, Freddie, you’re behaving worse than the children!”

There was a fifty-minute layover in Nairobi, and then they boarded their final flight, luckily only one hour and twenty minutes this time, to Dar-Es-Salaam, from which they would take a ferry the next morning to Zanzibar.

Brian sighed heavily as they walked through the airport that evening after finally having landed in Dar-Es-Salaam. “How did it all come to this?” he asked pushing a pushchair (stroller), a change bag (diaper bag) slung over his shoulder. “I mean we’re rock stars for goodness’ sake!”

Freddie was too weary to answer as he held Little Freddie and Kashmira’s hands, Kashmira rolling her little pink suitcase behind her.

“Yeah. So much for attracting all the exotic women,” Roger lamented, a wailing baby strapped to his chest.

They all had rooms on the top floor of a five-star beachfront hotel, near where the ferry would pick them up the next morning to take them to Zanzibar. Freddie and Jim shared a room, and then Mary and the kids next door. Freddie popped in to say good night to the children, and then returned to his and Jim’s room. As romantic as the setting was, with the moonlight filtering in, the curtains billowing in the gentle breeze coming off the ocean from the open balcony doorway, and the sound of waves softly lapping on the beach below, clearly there would be no monkey business between he and Jim tonight. Jim was already laid out on the bed on top of the sheets, mouth hanging open, snoring away. He hadn’t even bothered to get undressed, or remove his shoes. Freddie walked over and took Jim’s shoes off, letting them fall to the floor. Then he dragged himself into bed, and fell face first into the pillow beside Jim, whereupon he immediately fell asleep. They lay there trying to outdo each other with their snores, and neither one of the two of them moved a single muscle until morning.

Early the next morning, Freddie, Jim, Roger, Brian, and John stood in front of the hotel, waiting while the others got ready. The 7 AM ferry to Zanzibar was to arrive at the docks, conveniently located only meters away from the hotel. Little Freddie and Kashmira stood on either side of Freddie, still only barely awake.

“You know, I used to have an uncle who owned a villa right here in Dar-Es-Salaam, only yards from the sea,” Freddie told them. “And in the morning I’d be woken by the servant. Clutching an orange juice, I’d literally step right out onto the beach.”

Brian stepped away from the group for a moment, and spotting one of the hotel staff, went over to speak to them. Then he came back and stood beside the others as they looked out at the water. Shortly, another one of the hotel staff appeared carrying a tray with glasses of orange juice which he handed out to them. Freddie looked over at Brian and smiled.

“Cheers,” Brian said, holding up his glass. “Or whatever it is they say here.”

“ _Salud_ ,” Roger said, taking a sip.

“No, that’s Spanish,” Brian corrected.

“ _L’chaim? Sk_ _å_ _l? As-Salaam-Alaikum?_ ” Roger tried.

“I still don’t think that’s quite it,” Brian laughed.

“ _Fi sihtuk_ ,” the man from the hotel told them before walking away.

“ _Fi sihtuk_!” they cheered clinking their glasses together. Then they all turned, and stepped out onto the sand…

[[ The Logical Song ](https://youtu.be/low6Coqrw9Y) by Supertramp plays in the background...if this were a movie lol]

*******

The ferry ride started off in high spirits, all the children running to the rail to look down at the water. But unfortunately bad luck soon struck. Despite the early morning hour, the water was extremely choppy, and while the rest of them found their sea legs straightway, Brian and little Kashmira fell dreadfully ill with seasickness. Freddie cuddled her close in his lap, with her head lying against his chest, and he could tell she felt miserable. Luckily, Mary, with her mother's intuition, had thought to buy seasickness medication before their departure.

"Not to worry, darling," Mary said, stroking her face. "Mummy's got some medicine that will make you feel all better very soon."

But Kashmira only wanted her Daddy.

"It's alright, darling," Freddie said to her. "Daddy knows taking medicine is no fun, hmm?" He gave her a kiss. "But be Daddy's good girl, and go with Mummy and let her give you the medicine so you'll feel better." So Kashmira let Mary take her in her arms. "You might give some to Brian as well," Freddie told her, looking over at Brian who was looking very green.

"Would you mind?" Brian asked.

"No, of course not," Mary said. "Come along, then."

When they returned, Brian plopped down in a deck chair beside Freddie.

"Did you let Mummy give you the medicine?" Freddie asked Kashmira. She nodded her head. "Good girl." He took her in his lap again and held her close. She still felt awful.

"They'll both be asleep in a bit," Mary told Freddie.

"Close your eyes, baby, and go to sleep. You'll feel better soon," Freddie said, giving Kashmira a kiss. He tried to think of something to sing - a lullaby to comfort her, but was drawing a complete blank. Until suddenly a memory came to him, quite unbidden, of a time when he'd been sick with a fever as a child. He couldn't have been more than three-years-old at the time. He'd been crying and his nanny, Sabine, had started to pick him up to console him. But Freddie’s mother stopped her.

"I'll take him," she said with a smile, taking him in her arms. She carried him over to the sofa and sat down, patting and rocking him gently until he'd fallen asleep as she sang him a song…

" _Sona Rupana Paraniyama…_ ," Freddie sang softly. "I can't remember the words," he said to his mother, who came and sat down by his side.

" _Sona Rupana Paraniyama…,"_ his mother sang, taking over singing the [ song ](https://youtu.be/ZIUaSFY4r8w) as she stroked Kashmira's hair...Soon Kashmira, and Brian, were both fast asleep…

*******

Two hours later, when they pulled up to the docks in Zanzibar, there was a welcoming committee there to greet them, though not one that was happy to see them. Some people had come out to protest their arrival.

" _Daeva_ (demon)," a couple of women hissed, as Freddie and the others walked down the dock. "You'll burn in hell!"

"Go back to where you came from you fucking Parsi faggot!" A man farther along shouted.

"Cool it, mate!" Roger told him. "Can't you see there are children here?"

“Oh! Well, well, well! If it isn’t Mr. Big Time Rock Star, here to grace us all with his presence!” another man said. “Coming back here, flaunting all your wealth. You think you're better than us now?"

Brian looked over at Freddie, who was practically in tears. Clearly this wasn't the welcome he'd been expecting for Zanzibar's own most famous native son. "It's alright, Freddie. Let's just get to the hotel," he said.

Waiting for them at the end of the dock was a small, wiry Indian man with glasses.

"Ah! Hello, Mr. Mercury," he smiled, holding out his hand when they approached. "Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Javed Jafferji, your tour guide for the holiday.” He stepped aside, gesturing with a wave of his hand at a fleet of waiting limousines ready to whisk them all away to the hotel. “Shall we?”

*******

“Well,” Freddie said, once they’d arrived at their suites at the hotel, another gorgeous beach-front resort. “I suppose one thing we won't have to worry about is being mobbed by adoring fans.”

Apart from the small handful of people who had shown up at the docks to protest, everyone else was unimpressed, while insisting that they were not at all interested in " _Freddie Mercouri_ ".

"Freddie who?" they said, though they all knew very well who he was. "He gave up his family name. He does not live like us. He is nothing at all to do with us. He is a stranger. He is of another life."

Though Freddie had said it jokingly, they could all see the hurt in his eyes. Brian gave him a sympathetic smile. _Poor Freddie. Always trying to make light of a bad situation._

“A wise man once said, ‘A prophet is loved everywhere, except in his hometown’,” John said. “I mean I know you’re not a prophet or anything, but I think it still sort of applies in this situation.”

“Just change it to star and it fits perfectly,” Roger said. “A star is loved everywhere, except in his hometown.”

"Actually, Mr. Mercury," Javed said to him. "There is one fan who would really like to meet you."

"Well, I knew there had to be at least one on this whole damn island!" Freddie quipped, grinning at the others. "You're not talking about yourself are you, dear?"

"No," Javed laughed. "Though I am a huge fan of yours, Mr. Mercury," he hastily added. "It's a very sweet elderly lady who lives in Stone Town, where you used to live. She says she's been a fan of yours most of her life, and has always wanted to meet you, though she never thought she'd get the opportunity before she died."

"Well, yes! We'd love to meet her!" Brian said. "Er, that is if you want to, Freddie. It's your holiday after all."

"Oh, why not?" Freddie said, sipping from a glass of champagne. "We can't very well let down the one fan we've got in the place now can we?"

So after lunch, Freddie, Jim, Brian, Roger, John, and of course Javed, all got into one of the limousines to head to Stone Town. Little Freddie, Kashmira, Freddie's mother, sister, and her two children all came along as well, as they were supposed to visit some family in Stone Town once Freddie and the others were finished meeting with the fan. Everyone else stayed behind at the hotel for some much needed rest and relaxation.

They pulled up outside of a tiny, though well kept, home in the _less affluent_ part of Stone Town, though Javed assured them that they were all still quite safe.

Freddie, Brian, Roger, John, and Javed all got out, while the others waited behind in the limousine. They went up to the front door, and Freddie gave a polite little knock, winking at the others. They were about to make this lady’s whole day. But it was Freddie who was in for a surprise when the door was opened, for who else was standing there, but his old childhood nanny, Sabine.

“Sabine?” he asked, completely in shock.

“Oh, Freddie, my baby! My baby!” Sabine gasped, throwing her arms around him. “Let me get a good look at you,” she said after a while, holding him out at arms’ length. She shook her head, tears in her eyes, so proud. Then she pulled him tight again. “I never thought I’d see you again in my whole life.” Then she noticed Brian, Roger, and John standing there smiling. “And you must be Brian, Roger, and John,” she said, clearly having done her homework.

“Yes, that’s right,” Brian said, holding out his hand. But Sabine was the hugging type, and had to hug them all. “It’s so nice to meet you, Sabine,” Brian continued. “Freddie’s told us so much about you.”

And it was true. Though unbeknownst to her, Sabine was the original Fat Bottomed Girl, part of the inspiration behind the song Brian had written. When asked about the song, Brian would always say he had written it with Freddie in mind, about “stuff” he saw in both his and Freddie’s life, though he never would elaborate on what exactly that “stuff” was. But he and Freddie knew the truth. Sabine had been quite the pretty young thing back then. With her beautiful, glowing ebony skin and her curvy figure, she’d been Freddie’s first little boy crush, and he’d often tried to peep in on her when she was changing in her bedroom, his curiosity about the female anatomy getting the better of him. And more than once, when his parents were away, he’d spied Sabine getting frisky with one of her boyfriends, when she thought he was in bed fast asleep. So the part about “I knew life before I left my nursery” turned out to be quite true.

“Yes, he certainly has,” Roger agreed, earning himself a painful elbow in the ribs, that Brian made look like he’d been stretching.

“Oh Freddie, you were such a naughty little boy,” Sabine smiled teasingly. 

“So we’ve heard,” Roger said. This time Brian caught him in the stomach, doubling him over.

“Oh, Roger, are you alright?!” Brain asked, feigning concern. “Perhaps you’d better sit down over there – on the sofa.”

Once he found out it was Sabine, Freddie invited the others to come in as well.

“Oh, Little Kash, my baby!" Sabine cried, throwing her arms around Freddie's sister just like she'd done with Freddie. Then Sabine noticed the children - Little Freddie, Kashmira, Natalie, and Sam. "Oh, my babies have got babies!" Of course she had to hug them all as well. "Oh, they look just like you!" She told Freddie, taking Little Freddie and Kashmira's faces in her hands. "And who's this?" she asked, when she saw Jim.

"Oh, this is my-" Freddie began, unsure how to finish the sentence.

"He's Papa Jim," Kashmira told her matter-of-factly, and Jim soon found himself enfolded in Sabine's embrace too.

They stayed for a long time, catching up, and Sabine revealed that she'd spent some of her meager earnings to track down and buy every Queen album each time a new one was released. Of course Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John had to sign them all for her.

"You're the only fan we've got on this whole island. Did you know that?" Freddie asked as he signed.

And Sabine told them that she'd gone to a neighbor's house to watch Live Aid with them on their tiny television.

"I was so proud," she said.

Finally, it came time to leave, and Sabine had to hug them all again. "Take good care of my Freddie for me," she whispered in Jim's ear before letting him go.

"I will, I promise," Jim told her.

Sabine held onto Freddie, squeezing him tight for as long as she could, right up until the last moment as tears slid down her face, knowing this truly would be the last time. Freddie kissed her cheek, and Sabine took his face in her hands. "Goodbye, baby," she said. " _Inshallah_ (If God wills) we will meet again in the next life." She stood in the doorway wiping her tears with a handkerchief and waving goodbye as they slowly drove away…

*******

Next they went to visit one of his first cousins. Her name was Perviz Darukhanawalla, and she and Freddie's fathers were brothers. She was delighted with the children, and had many fond memories of when Freddie himself had been a child.

"You were so small, like a little pet," she said. "Even when you were a very young baby, you used to come to my home with your parents. They used to leave you with my mother and go out. When you were a bit older, you would play about in our house. You were such a naughty little one. I was much older than you, and I liked taking care of you. You were such a small boy, a very nice child. I loved you so much. Every time you came, I wanted you to stay. But your parents would always collect you and take you back home at the end of an evening out." She reached out and touched his face. "You're so different somehow now," she said.

Freddie was much relieved when they returned to the hotel. It was that night as he was helping put Little Freddie and Kashmira to bed, that Kashmira asked him one of those difficult questions, as children will.

"Daddy," she said.

"What is it, baby?" he asked.

"What does _fucking Parsi faggot_ mean?"

Little Freddie gasped. "Oooh!"

"It's alright," Freddie told him. Then he turned back to Kashmira. "Well for starters, _fucking_ is a very naughty swear word," Freddie told her.

"You say it," Little Freddie was quick to point out. "Like all the time."

"I know. But I shouldn't," Freddie said. "And _Parsi_ is...well, it's a person whose ancestors - that means people in their family who lived a very long time ago - used to live in a faraway place called Persia and were friends of a very wise man named Zoroaster. And then one day they all left Persia and came to live in a place called Gujarat in India, which is where we'll be going to visit soon. That's where Dādī and Dādā are from, you see."

Kashmira nodded her head seriously.

"And _faggot_ is a very hurtful word that means a man who loves another man, like Papa Jim and I love each other."

"But why?" Kashmira asked.

"Well, because some people think it should only be a man and a woman who love each other that way."

"But why?"

"Well, because that's just what they were taught when they were little - by their parents or at school or whatever," he told her. "But that's ok. It's ok for people to think or believe different things. We don't all have to agree, but the important thing is that we all respect each other. But sometimes people get angry because they're confused or they don't understand how anyone could ever think anything different from what they think about something. And sometimes they may say or do hurtful things. But it doesn't matter what other people think, or what they say or do. The only thing that matters is what you believe. And we all love Papa Jim very much, don't we?"

The children both nodded their heads.

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "Now go to sleep. Daddy'll see you in the morning, and we'll all have some more fun together, alright?" He kissed them both good night, and then returned to his and Jim's room.

*******

The next day they all went sight-seeing together. First to the Stone Town flat overlooking the sea where Freddie, Kash, and their parents had lived. Afterwards to the Government Hospital Zanzibar, where Freddie first saw the dazzling light of the world - born on Thursday, September 05, 1946, a healthy baby boy weighing almost seven pounds. Then to the Zanzibar Missionary school where Freddie had first been enrolled at the age of five. And St. Joseph’s Convent School, where he completed his education after having returned to Zanzibar from India, and where he and a classmate, Bonzo Fernandez, would sometimes jump out of the window after school, and swim in the sea, which Freddie loved to do. Next through the thin, narrow, ramshackle streets between ancient white walls; and beautiful beaches with their white coral sands and azure waters, where Freddie would run and play with the other boys - cycling, swimming, eating snacks, climbing coconut trees, playing hockey and cricket - Freddie being especially good at cricket. They stopped for lunch at Camlur's Restaurant, in whose courtyard Freddie and his friends used to play jacks and marbles. And finally at the end of the day, just as the blood red sun was sinking beneath the waters on the horizon, they came to what had once been Freddie's favorite place - the harbor, where he had spent many an hour just watching the passing ships, and countless sunsets, just as they were doing now.

Later in the week, Freddie and Jim spent a day together, just the two of them, to go on Zanzibar's renowned Spice Tour, it being known as The Spice Island after all. First they were taken to the spice farms where they learned all about the different spices and their uses. Not only did they get to see and smell the spices, but taste them as well, and eat some of the fruits directly from the trees! At lunch they were taken to a kitchen and taught how to prepare dishes using the spices they had just learned about. Jim wisely did most of the cooking, with Freddie helping him. Then they cosied up on the floor spread with blankets, enjoying a delicious lunch of spiced rice, chapati, spiced bread, spinach and coconut sauce. Lastly they were taken to the spice markets, where they had a chance to buy not only the spices, but also oils and perfumes made using the spices. Freddie bought some nutmeg because the seller convinced him it was an aphrodisiac.

"We'll have to sprinkle some of this on our food later," he grinned at Jim with a wink. It had been quite the romantic day, and Freddie was sure to put out the DO NOT DISTURB sign on their door when he and Jim retired to their room that evening.

*******

It was on their last night in Zanzibar, that Kash asked Freddie to come outside.

"Come out to the beach with me," she said. So they went out together to the sand. Kash sat on a large rock while Freddie stood beside her, throwing rocks into the sea, as the wind blew through their hair and the light from the moon was their only illumination.

"What is it, Kash?" Freddie asked. "What did you want to talk about?"

"I just wanted to say, do you remember that one time?" she asked. "Right before you were to be sent away again to return to boarding school in India after the summer holidays, you asked me what I wanted as a goodbye gift, and I had seen this beautiful hair clip in one of the shop windows in town. You said it was too expensive, but I said it was that or nothing else. So you spent everything you had and you got it for me anyway."

"Yes, I remember," Freddie said with a smile, tossing another rock into the tide.

"I remember another time," she said with a laugh. "We came to visit you during one of your school holidays when you were staying with one of our aunts in Bombay. I was playing with a little cousin, and you started teasing me and decided to take my dollies. And I got angry and picked up a rock and pinged you in the face with it. That's how you got that scar on your cheek, under your right eye," she said, coming over to him. "And you were the one who ended up getting into trouble! You had to go to hospital and have two stitches put in. And the next day we returned to Zanzibar, leaving you there hurt and alone…" she trailed off sadly. She reached up then, giving him a kiss on his cheek over the scar.

They stood staring out at the water as the waves slowly rolled in.

" _In the land where horses born with eagle wings; And honey bees have lost their stings_ …," Kashmira sang softly, quoting from Freddie's song _My Fairy King_. "You wrote that song about the fairy-tale place you and I created together, didn't you? The place we called Rhye?"

Freddie didn't answer, but she knew he was listening, so she went on.

"You were six when I was born, so I only had a year of you really, apart from when I would see you occasionally during your holidays from school. And yet I was always aware of my proud older brother protecting me," she said. "When you were sent away, I missed you terribly. And when I was sad, I would go there to Rhye, and I would invent you, just like we invented all of the other fairy-tale things. Because there I could have you with me always, even when you were gone." She took Freddie's face in her hands, tears in her eyes. "No matter what you felt or what you thought, Freddie, you were never forgotten. Not ever." She wrapped her arms around him, and Freddie bent down, giving her a kiss on the forehead. They stood there, holding each other tight, as the water gently lapped against the sand…

*******

Early the next morning before dawn, while it was still dark outside, Freddie was just putting the last few things into his suitcase, when he heard the [_Azan_](https://youtu.be/mUHDYlJHaOQ), the Muslim call to prayer, begin. And though they'd heard it many times since their arrival on the island, this particular time Freddie was stopped in his tracks, as he was reminded of his own family's flight from Zanzibar some twenty years earlier. The violent Zanzibar Revolution of January 1964 saw thousands slaughtered in bloody battles in the street. It was just as the _Isha_ (nighttime) call to prayer had begun, that the revolutionaries had decided to attack, the cries and screaming from the streets joining with the sounds of the _Azan_ , as Freddie's parents desperately threw what few possessions they could into a couple of suitcases. Freddie had been seventeen at the time, and a young, ten-year-old Kashmira clung to him tightly, crying.

"It's alright, Kash," Freddie had told her, taking her face in his hands. "I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you. I promise." He'd given her a kiss, and hugged her close. 

The Bulsaras fled Zanzibar that very night with the help of neighbors, taking with them only the two suitcases and the clothes on their backs. They made their way to Feltham in London, England, where relatives had offered them refuge. And they never looked back. Until now.

"Are you alright?" Jim asked, snapping Freddie back to the present moment.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Freddie said with a smile to reassure him. "I was just...remembering..."

*******

They arrived at the docks in Stone Town for the 7 AM return ferry to Dar-Es-Salaam, from which they would take a flight to Bombay, India. The same hecklers who had come out to greet them, had returned to see them off. Freddie stood there, perhaps a bit nervously, steeling himself for the walk down the dock, until he felt a tiny hand slip into his own. He looked down to see Kashmira, who also reached out to take Jim's hand, her head held high. Freddie and Jim looked at each other, both so proud of their girl, then slung their bags over their shoulders, and with chests puffed out with pride, walked down the dock towards the waiting ferry...

***BONUS* Here's a picture of Freddie with his nanny, Sabine :)**

****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S. I made up the part about Sabine being the original Fat Bottomed Girl, but you never know - Brian never did reveal what exactly the "stuff" was that he saw in his and Freddie's life that inspired the song hahaha ;)


	4. Arrival In Bombay...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very special thanks to QueenEmpath for the very helpful information that was useful in writing this chapter.

Freddie was not the least bit sad to be leaving Zanzibar, and he did not plan to ever return. As they gained distance, and the island slowly slipped away from sight, he breathed a sigh of relief, ready to at last put that part of his life behind him forever. He was in an exceptionally good mood, despite another day of exhausting travel that lay ahead as they made their way to Bombay. The sun glinted off his dark, mirrored sunglasses, and the wind off the sea blew through his hair, ruffling his open shirt as he sat stretched out in one of the deck chairs, sipping a glass of champagne. The others all seemed to share in his good mood and sense of relief, even Brian and Kashmira, both having been pre-medicated with seasickness medication before their departure. Kashmira ran and played with the other children, running to the rail to search the waters below for dolphins and sharks and whales. _They might see a dolphin_, Freddie thought to himself. But he seriously doubted they would see a shark or whale. _But let them look anyway_ , he smiled. After a while, however, Kashmira grew sleepy due to the medication, and wanted in Freddie's lap. So Freddie took her in his lap and cuddled her close, where she slept for the rest of the two-hour ferry ride back to Dar-Es-Salaam, no place more comforting than in Daddy's arms.

It was another long flight from Dar-Es-Salaam to Bombay - six hours. But this time, after Freddie's third _Are we there yet?_ , Mary said to him, "You know, Freddie, I still have some of that seasickness medication that I gave to Brian and Kashmira earlier, in my bag, and if you keep it up, my hand just might _slip_ over your drink when you're not looking or gone to the loo. Maybe when you're passed out asleep I will finally get a little peace and quiet!" The threat seemed to work, and Mary didn't hear a single solitary peep out of him the rest of the trip, though he was extremely wary of his drinks after that, turning away from her with a hand held over the top of his glass.

However much they had been hated in Zanzibar, they were loved all that much more in India. Crowds of screaming fans, having learned of their arrival (no matter how hard you tried to keep these sort of things quiet, they always seemed to get leaked to the press), lined the airport's walkways. While they hadn't needed much security in Zanzibar, nor had it been offered, it became quite apparent that they would need extra security here, which thankfully Javed had already thought to arrange. An official was waiting to greet them at the airport's exit. He was an older Indian gentleman with graying hair, dressed in a tasteful grey suit.

"Hello, Mr. Mercury! Welcome to Bombay," he said with a friendly head wobble, extending his hand. "I hope you had a most pleasant journey. My name is Ramesh Kumar. And these-" he motioned to two men in police uniform, standing stock still, hands clasped behind their backs, "-are Aarav and Reyansh, the two heads of your security team. I assure you, they and their men will keep you and your families safe at all times during your holiday here in India." He swept his hand towards the exit doors. "Enjoy your stay," he smiled.

Aarav and Reyansh turned sharply on their heels, barking orders at their men, who formed a flank around Freddie and the others, escorting them to the limousines waiting for them outside.

Later that night, after the children had been put to bed, Freddie had gone to clean his teeth, when Jim suddenly heard screams coming from their in-suite bathroom. Jim burst into the room, imagining all sorts of horrible things, and then nearly collapsed in stitches of laughter at the sight that met his eyes. Freddie was literally standing on top of the toilet seat, a look of sheer terror on his face.

"Spider!" he shouted, pointing to the floor where a rather large spider was crawling across the room. Jim looked around for a glass or box to catch it in, as Freddie hated for Jim to kill them. He never meant the spiders any harm, he just preferred that they stay away - far away, from him. But suddenly, in his fright, Freddie accidentally stepped on the panel attached to the side of the toilet, which controlled the bidet attachment. A blast of water began shooting out, spraying Jim directly in the face, as he tried in vain to shield himself from the assault. The water spraying everywhere caused Freddie to slip, luckily falling down directly on the toilet seat, the jet of water now spraying out from between his legs. Now that his foot was no longer on the panel, the stream of water slowly dwindled down until it was just a trickle, and then stopped completely. There was a slight mechanical whirring noise as the bidet attachment retracted back into its receptacle. Jim stood there dripping wet, wiping the water from his eyes, as Freddie sat there looking horrified, still unsure of what exactly had just happened. Then they looked at each other, and burst out laughing.

"Are you ok?" Freddie asked with concern after they had finally stopped laughing.

"Oh, I'm fine. What about you? That was a pretty hard fall you took there," Jim said, extending his hand to help Freddie up.

"Wait!" Freddie shouted, pulling his legs up to his chest. "Where's the spider?"

"Don't worry, it's gone now," Jim said.

Freddie stood up. "Well, I would kiss you," he said to Jim. "But, uh…"

Jim just laughed. "That's alright. I don't blame you. I wouldn't kiss me either," he said. Then he sighed. "Well, I think I'll have a shower now."

"What if it comes back while I'm asleep and crawls in my ear and lays its eggs?" Freddie asked later as they lay beside each other in bed.

"It won't come back. It's more scared of you than you are of it," Jim told him. He cuddled up close to Freddie, pulling him tight. "Anyway, don't worry. I'll protect you."

So Freddie lay there trying to sleep, and not think about the spider, when suddenly he felt a light, prickly sensation moving rapidly over the skin of his arm. He flung the covers off, leaping out of bed. "Aaahh! It's crawling on me!" Then he looked over at Jim who grinned, waggling his fingers at Freddie, showing that it had been him, and not the spider. "You bastard!" Freddie shouted good-naturedly, flinging a pillow at Jim which he swatted away, laughing.

Jim supposed he really shouldn't have. Freddie wasn't having much luck with insects since their arrival in Bombay. They'd been standing out on the balcony just before they'd come inside to get ready for bed, when Freddie had gone to take a sip of his drink and found a large moth ‘the size of a fucking pterodactyl’ spluttering in his glass. But Jim just couldn't help messing with him. Even after they lay back down again to go to sleep, it still took Jim quite a long while to stop himself laughing.

The next day they all left the hotel (they were staying at the world-renowned five-star luxury Taj Palace Hotel), at 8 AM to go on a 12-hour all day private guided tour of some of Bombay's most important historical and cultural sights: the Gateway of India, the Victoria Terminus, Marine Drive, Chowpatty Beach, Gandhi's home, Malabar Hill, the Dhobi Ghat laundry, the Flora Fountain, the Kala Ghoda Art Precinct, Bombay University, and Bollywood's Film City, which Freddie absolutely adored. He even got to meet many of the famous Bollywood actors and actresses, including Madhuri Dixit and Anil Kapoor (who Freddie secretly thought looked pretty damn hot!).

“I am a big fan of your work, Mr. Mercury. You all must come and have dinner with me,” Anil insisted.

But Freddie politely declined. Not because he didn’t want to. He would have loved to, it was just that he felt extremely nervous and shy around people he didn’t know well.

“Chai then,” Anil said, to which Freddie at last agreed. And they had a wonderful time as they sat there chatting, and drinking the delicious Indian tea served with tea biscuits.

Then they departed, and at noon the group had lunch from Dabbawalas, India's famous lunch box delivery men. And the last stop of the day was a visit to Crawford Market, the biggest wholesale market in Bombay. It was what might be called "functional chaos" and a complete assault on the senses that threatened to overwhelm. People, cows, goats, shops, and market stands set up on sidewalks, were all crammed together. The sounds of cars honking, dogs barking, music, and the shouts of the street vendors and running children filled the air. The pungent smell of cooking food, choking exhaust from the thousands of cars, and the putrid scent of rotting waste in the gutters, mixed with the cloying sweetness of flowers and the spiciness of herbs. And there was food enough to satisfy anybody's taste - sweet, sour, salty, and everything in between. It was everything all at once - both beautiful and ugly - and Freddie loved it all. He even showed the others how to haggle properly to get the best price, something he'd learned as a young boy with only a few rupees in his pocket from the meager allowance his parents sent him while he was at boarding school. And Freddie made sure they all got to try one of his childhood favorites, a drink called _falooda_ , which was like a sort of milk shake, made of milk, rose water, and a sort of red tapioca-sized confection balls which turned gelatinous when immersed in the milk.

When they finally arrived back at the hotel at 8 PM, the vehicle loaded down with shopping bags (most of them Freddie's), it seemed Freddie wasn't quite ready for the night to end, and it was declared that tonight would be boys’ night out. It was to be Freddie, Brian, Roger (both of them, as Kashmira's husband was named Roger too), John, Jim, Phoebe, and Javed for a night out on the town away from the wives and kids.

"Alright, boys. Behave yourselves. And don't forget we're supposed to be leaving for Panchgani tomorrow morning. The cars will be here to collect us at the hotel just a little before noon," Mary told them all before they left for the evening. She grabbed Freddie's arm as he was walking away. "Freddie, I'm serious," she whispered sternly into his ear.

"Of course, darling. Don't worry," Freddie smiled. So why was it every time Freddie said _don't worry_ , that that was exactly what Mary started to do?

But Freddie couldn't leave without saying goodbye to the children first.

“Did you have fun today?” he asked them.

“Yeah!” the both shouted excitedly.

“Good,” he smiled. "Give Daddy a kiss goodbye," he told Kashmira. "Mummy'll be the one to put you to bed tonight, so the both of you be good and mind what she tells you, and Daddy'll see you in the morning. We'll be going to Panchgani and you'll get to see where Daddy went to school when he was a little boy."

"Daddy…," Kashmira said.

 _Oh no_ , Freddie thought.

"Why were all those children coming up to us and asking us for money?" Kashmira continued. It had happened just as they were leaving the market. At first Aarav and Reyansh had tried to run the children off, but Freddie stopped them, and handed out every single rupee he had left in cash.

 _Oh fuck_. But then Freddie scolded himself. He ought to be glad for these little teachable moments, when he could explain something of the world to his children. But why did children always have to ask the hardest questions? These things were difficult enough to explain to adults, let alone children.

"Because they're poor!" Little Freddie answered his sister before Freddie could say anything.

"But why?" Kashmira asked. _Always why at this age_ , Freddie thought to himself.

"Because they haven't any money, Kash! Duh!" Little Freddie told her.

"Hey! Don't talk to your sister that way," Freddie scolded. "Tell her you're sorry."

"Sorry, Kash," Little Freddie apologized with a sigh. "But it's true, Daddy!" he said.

"I know it's true, but you don't talk to your sister that way. She's only little, and she doesn't understand," Freddie told him, and Little Freddie hung his head. Then Freddie sighed, sitting down on the bed. "Come here, baby," he said to Kashmira, taking her on his knee. [[Lucky Man by Emerson, Lake, & Palmer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmT2KvF4P5g) starts playing softly in the background] "The truth of the matter, darling, is that sometimes, often times in fact, life is dreadfully unfair for most people in this world, except for a very privileged few," Freddie told her, stroking her hair. "That's just the way things are. Some people are born into families that have a lot of money, and other people, through no fault of their own, are born into families that have less. But that doesn't make them any less of a person, though some people treat them that way. A person's worth should never be based on how much money he or she has. I mean, just because I'm famous and I have a lot of money, doesn't make my life any more valuable than that of any other man out there on the street," he explained. "But anyway, the best way to help people isn't to go around feeling ashamed or guilty, but instead to be thankful for how truly lucky we are, and not to squander the opportunities we've been given, that a lot of people won't ever get the chance to have. And also by helping out where we can and doing our part, like participating in things like Live Aid, for example. Does that make sense, honey?"

Kashmira and Little Freddie both nodded their heads.

"Shall I say a prayer for them?" Kashmira asked.

"Yes, darling. When Mummy puts you to bed, you can say a nice prayer for them. It's always good to pray for those less fortunate than ourselves," Freddie told her. "Ok, Daddy's got to go." He kissed her goodbye, and then walked over towards the door, but stopped just before going out. "Come here, Freddie," he said in a neutral tone, beckoning him with his finger. Little Freddie came over as he was told, and Freddie saw there were tears in his eyes, he guessed from his having scolded him a bit earlier. He really looked like he might start crying any second. Sometimes Little Freddie was a bit sensitive about being scolded, especially if it was Freddie doing the telling off, because like most little boys, he always sought his father's approval and hated the feeling of having his father disappointed in him when he'd done something wrong. So Freddie was glad he didn't have to do it very often. In fact, until now, he hadn't had to scold either one of his children this entire trip, which he was grateful for. Freddie put his arms around him, hugging him close. "Come here. I'm sorry I scolded you earlier, alright?" he told him, giving him a kiss on the head. Then he held him away a little, taking his face in his hands. "All I’m saying, darling, is that I know she probably asks about a million questions a day, and that it can be frustrating. But that’s how little children learn - by asking questions, you see. And anyway she loves you. You're her big brother and she looks up to you. So if she asks a question, even if it seems silly, just try your very best to be patient with her, and answer her as kindly and gently as possible, alright?”

"Ok," Little Freddie said, nodding his head and wiping his eyes.

"That's my boy!" Freddie gave him a wink, punching him playfully on the shoulder. That won him a smile from Little Freddie. "Alright, be good and mind your mother." He bent down and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you. I'll see you in the morning, alright?"

"Ok," Little Freddie nodded his head again.

Then Freddie went out and joined the others where they were waiting for him in the hallway.

"Alright, my darlings," he said, putting on his sunglasses, even though it was dark outside. "Let's do it!"


	5. Boys' Night Out In Bombay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of silliness and fun before dealing with more serious issues in the next chapters as they continue their trip to Panchgani and Gujarat.

First they went to a bar for dinner and drinks, where Freddie was very helpful with the menu, suggesting things the others might like to try. He even found a tasty vegetarian dish for Brian. Freddie was enjoying himself enormously and was clearly in his element here in Bombay, and they were all glad to see the smile on his face. It was refreshing seeing him so happy, especially after their rather disastrous trip to Zanzibar.

Aarav and Reyansh stood guard on either side of the table, until Freddie demanded they, ‘sit their arses down and eat'!

"Oh, no, Mr. Mercury," Aarav protested. "We've been given strict orders not to interfere, only to protect."

“Well, just eating isn't interfering, is it?"

After some thought, Aarav and Reyansh both shook their heads.

"There you are then," Freddie said. "So sit down, and order anything you'd like." Aarav and Reyansh both thanked him with a polite head wobble and sat down, though they still kept out a wary eye lest anyone try and get too close. But Freddie and the others had found the people of India to be nothing less than some of the kindest, nicest people they had ever encountered in their travels to countries all around the world. This was also about the time that the drinks began arriving, and the party really began. 

A little later, a stunning-looking woman in a rather revealing dress, decided she wanted to join their party, and made a bee-line for Freddie. Aarav and Reyansh started to move to stop her, but Freddie gave them a wink, telling them it was alright. The woman forced herself between Freddie and Jim, with her right buttock precariously perched on Freddie's leg and her left on Jim’s. She then crossed her legs and, every so often, her hand slipped from around their necks, to her side as she yanked her hemline a little higher up her tanned legs.

“Have you got a girlfriend?” she asked Freddie.

“No, I haven’t,” he replied.

“Have you got a wife?” she asked.

He leaned across her, put his hand on Jim’s knee and said: “Yes. This is the wife!”

With that the poor woman almost died! She babbled hurried excuses and ran off into the crowd to hide, while they all died laughing.

It was at the end of the meal that a rather tipsy and red-faced Phoebe suggested they take part in the bar’s karaoke hour.

“You could take ‘em all,” he said with a laugh, and then a hiccup, which he promptly excused himself for.

Freddie agreed, as long as they didn’t do any Queen songs, because that seemed a bit tacky and unfair. So having paid for three songs, they all went up on stage together, properly sloshed by now, and first sang [ Cover Of The Rolling Stone by Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Ux3-a9RE1Q). 

“Well, we’re big rock singers. We got golden fingers. And we’re loved everywhere we go…” Freddie sang, with the others singing backup. “Except Zanzibar,” he added. 

“Well it’s true, we haven’t ever been on the cover,” he told the crowd at the end. “But fuck ‘em! That’s their loss!”

Then they sang [ Lola by The Kinks](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LemG0cvc4oU).

“I met her in a club down in South Bombay…,” Freddie ad-libbed, making everyone laugh. 

And at the end they sang [ Squeeze Box by The Who](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4n02PD18cFs), completely bringing down the house.

After that, things began to get a bit fuzzy…until they all woke up the next morning…

*******

Freddie woke up with the sun shining in his eyes. He lay there for a moment feeling like death, then sat up slowly, holding his spinning head. He looked down at himself. _This isn’t my_ shirt, he thought. Then he looked around slowly, taking in his surroundings. The hotel room (one he didn’t recognize!) was a complete mess. He looked beside him where Jim lay diagonally across the bed, snoring with his mouth open. Phoebe sat in the corner, a lampshade on his head. Javed lay sprawled out on the other bed, his shirt only half-way tucked into his trousers, his glasses skewed, and an inexplicably large smile on his face. Brian was slumped over a table nearby. Roger, Kashmira’s husband, lay face down on the floor in nothing more than his underwear. And there was no sign whatsoever of Roger, John, Aarav, or Reyansh. There was a squeaky sort of noise coming from the ceiling that caught Freddie’s attention, and he looked up to see what looked like a championship boxer belt hanging over one of the blades of the ceiling fan that was going slowly round and round.

He just shook his head, then wished he hadn't - that hurt! When he looked back down, that’s when he saw it - what looked like the form of a sleeping woman, passed out on the floor in the middle of the room. _Oh, shit._ He got up from the bed, noticing as he did so that there was sand all over the floor. But he ignored it for now, and crept over quietly. The woman had on a beautiful traditional Bollywood dancer outfit, complete with veil, obscuring her face.

“Miss! Miss!” Freddie called, gently shaking her arm. Suddenly, the woman awakened, flinging back her arm to reveal that it wasn’t a woman at all – it was Roger!

“Ugh! What?!” he demanded. Then the realization struck him. He sat up, looking down at himself. “What the bloody hell have I got on?!” he asked. “And where are my clothes?!”

Just then everybody else began to stir as well.

“Where’s John?” Brian asked, having realized he was missing.

“I don’t know,” Freddie said. “Has anyone checked the bathroom?”

So Brian got up to do just that. “Oh my God!” he shouted, and Freddie and the others ran in, hearts pounding, imagining the worst. But it soon became apparent why Brian had shouted out like that, and it didn’t have anything to do with John, who was passed out in the empty bathtub, and wearing Freddie’s shirt by the way! The state of the bathroom made them all gag - clearly curry and alcohol don’t mix.

“Quick! Somebody grab his feet,” Brian said, covering his mouth and nose with his shirt and trying not to breathe. They carried John into the main room and laid him out on the floor. Then Brian went over and slammed the bathroom door shut, pressing his back against it.

Freddie knelt beside John, gently patting his face to wake him up. Suddenly they all heard a mysterious hissing, spitting noise coming from a large woven basket with a lid near the front door that they hadn’t noticed being there before.

“Er, guys…” Brian said, just as John was sitting up. “I think there might be a cobra in that basket over there.”

John stayed where he was, as the others slowly crept towards the basket. Suddenly the basket began quivering as even more frightening snake-like sounds emitted. They all began pushing each other towards the basket, Javed ending up at the front, with Freddie behind him.

“You’re Indian!” Freddie told him, as if just by his being Indian that suddenly made him some sort of expert snake charmer or something.

“So are you!” Javed said.

“Parsi! Parsi!” Freddie corrected him. Suddenly the shoving stopped.

“Er…Javed…you’ve got a little something, uh…” Brian began, pointing at the back of Javed’s trousers.

“What? What have I got?” Javed asked, practically panicking, trying to look behind him.

“Perhaps, you’d better come have a look in the mirror,” Brian told him. He took Javed over to the full-length mirror beside the wardrobe. Javed looked behind him into the mirror, and saw what looked like tattooed writing in Hindi, partially obscured by his trousers and underwear. He pulled them down just slightly to reveal the horrid, awful truth. It was a tattoo - right above his arse that said:

“Oh!” Javed gasped. “Property of Freddie Mercury?” he read out slowly. “ _He bhagavaan! Mainne kiya kya hai!_ (Oh, God! What have I done?!)”

Their attention was suddenly drawn back to the basket which was shaking even harder now, and the sounds coming from it truly terrifying.

Javed gulped, and slowly made his way over to the basket, with the others following close behind. He closed his eyes, whispering a quick prayer in Hindi, then lifted the lid. Coiled in the bottom of the basket was exactly what they had expected - a giant king cobra with a small, almost jewel-like head and glittering black eyes above the outstretched hood, it's tongue flicking in and out menacingly.

"Aaahh!" They all screamed as Javed slammed the lid back down before it could strike.

*******

"Does anyone know where the hell we are, or what the fuck happened last night?" Freddie asked.

"And even more important than that-," Javed said, "-how the bloody hell did I get this tattoo?!"

"This might be a clue," Roger, Kash's husband, said, pulling a railway ticket from his pocket. Freddie came over to look. The destination said Kalyan.

"Kalyan?! Oh, fuck!" Freddie groaned, holding his head in his hands.

"Kalyan?" Brian asked, curiously. "Where's that?"

"We're at least an hour from Bombay," Freddie told him.

"An hour?!" Roger shouted, while the others protested.

"Does anyone have the time?" Freddie asked.

Roger looked down at his wrist, then remembered his normal clothes were missing, apparently including his watch. "Great! Must've left my watch in my other trousers. A very expensive watch that was too," he sighed.

"Looks like it's a little before nine right now," the other Roger answered.

"Alright. If we leave right now, I think we may still be able to make it back to Bombay in time," Freddie said. "Ok, first things first. Phoebe, darling-"

"Don't worry, Freddie. I'm already on it," Phoebe said. "First I'll go down to the front desk and get a ride arranged to pick us up and take us back to the hotel. I'll apologize profusely to the front desk on behalf of Mr. Freddie Mercury for the state of the room whilst slipping them a large tip, and tell them where they can bill the damages too, and that they may uh...want to call animal control while they're at it. Then I'll go to the hotel shop and buy the largest bottle of painkillers they have, some bottled water, and some er...breath mints," he spouted off. "Will there be anything else?" he smiled.

"Er...no, dear. I think that about covers it," Freddie said, shocked at the efficiency of Phoebe even in his hung-over state.

"And I'll uh...help him," Javed said.

When Phoebe opened the door, they found Aarav and Reyansh outside standing guard.

"Are we really in Kalyan?" Freddie asked them and they both nodded their heads.

"Fuck!" Freddie swore again.

"We're so sorry, Mr. Mercury," Aarav apologized. "But as you know, we were given strict orders not to interfere, only to protect."

"No, of course, darling, I completely understand. And I'm the one who's sorry. I'm the one who should be apologizing, not you, dear. I've kept you both out on duty all night long," Freddie lamented.

"Oh, no, Mr. Mercury. That's our job," Reyansh told him. "As head of your security team, we've been assigned to protect you 24/7 during your stay here in India." He went on to explain they'd had the hotel room just next door, and had taken it in turns to stand guard, so the other could freshen up and get some sleep.

"Phoebe, darling, take care of both rooms," Freddie said. Phoebe nodded as he and Javed went out, and Freddie motioned Aarav and Reyansh into the room, closing the door behind them. "I suppose the two of you know all about last night?" Freddie asked.

Aarav and Reyansh wobbled their heads yes, huge grins plastered on their faces, as they tried to hold back laughter. They looked as giddy as two school boys.

"Ok, we need to know exactly what happened, so we can come up with some sort of plausible cover story for all of this," Freddie told them. "We're going to be in enough trouble as it is now." And all the others agreed.

"Oh, it's a rather long story, Mr. Mercury," Aarav said, a twinkle in his eye. "Perhaps it would be better to discuss it on the way back to Bombay."

So first they all sorted out their clothing. Freddie and John started to switch their shirts back, until Freddie remembered the state of the bathroom where they'd found John earlier.

"You know what, darling?" Freddie said, wrinkling up his nose. "Keep it."

Jim couldn't find his socks, until Brian opened the microwave in the kitchenette, where it appeared somebody had been trying to dry them.

"Yours?" he asked, handing them to Jim.

"I hope this cover story of yours is going to include an explanation as to why I'm dressed like this!" Roger said.

"Don't worry, darling," Freddie told him. "We'll take care of it on the way."

When Phoebe and Javed returned, it was decided if they were to cover their tracks, something would have to be done about the smell as well. The stench of alcohol, cigarette smoke, curry, sweaty bodies, and God only knows what else, did not make for a pleasing aroma. There was no time for showers, and anyway the bathroom was completely unusable.

"Not to worry, darlings. I've got just the thing," Freddie said, pulling a slender tube of perfume from his pocket.

"No! No way, Freddie! I'm not wearing a lady's perfume!" Roger protested, despite the fact that he was currently wearing a lady's dress!

"Well, it's that or nothing, darling," Freddie said.

So they formed a sort of assembly line, Freddie spraying on the perfume, Javed handing out the painkillers, and last of all Phoebe with the water and breath mints.

"Water? Breath mints?" he smiled like some sort of concierge.

Before leaving, Freddie stood on the bed, and took the championship boxing belt down from the ceiling fan. Then they all put on their sunglasses, to protect their eyes from the painful light, and made their way downstairs to the lobby (Roger with his veil down to hide his face), and then outside where the limo Phoebe had arranged to take them back to the hotel in Bombay, had just pulled up outside. And behind that, the animal control van from which two men got out, muttering to themselves in Hindi about something to do with a cobra. Freddie and the others shielded their faces in embarrassment, and quickly climbed into the limousine.

*******

On the way back to the hotel, they rode with the windows rolled down so they could "air out", as it were. Then Aarav and Reyansh began their tale of the previous night's escapades…

*******

After the karaoke, they'd left the bar and were walking down the street when Javed asked, "Who'd like to watch a fight?"

A little further on, they came upon a building made of corrugated sheet metal. They paid the man at the door, and slipped inside what appeared to be some sort of abandoned factory that had been repurposed into a small boxing arena. The air was filled with cigarette smoke and the sounds of shouting, as they made their way down to their seats in the front row. They had even more beer brought to them, as they watched the fight between two local Indian boxers, which ended in a knock-out for one of the men.

"I could have taken him!" Freddie proclaimed loudly to the others at the end of the match. 

That's when the winner, having overhead, began yelling at him.

"What's he saying?" Freddie asked.

"He's calling you out," Javed interpreted. "He says he'd like to see you try."

"Alright, darling. You're on," Freddie said pointing his finger at the men, and removing his shirt. Against their better judgement, Aarav and Reyansh decided to let him go ahead. Freddie already had on his boxing shoes that he always wore, and since this was extremely small-time, there wasn't much else to put on, other than a pair of ratty old used boxing gloves somebody tossed to him. Freddie stood in one corner rolling his neck from side to side, with Brian and Roger rubbing his shoulders to pump him up. That's when he looked over and noticed a seedy little man in the audience taking bets, and Javed was betting against him!

"I-I…," Javed stammered, realizing he'd been caught out.

"That's alright, darling. Bet against me," Freddie told him. "But if I win, you have to get a tattoo of my choosing. And I get to pick where it goes."

Javed hardened his face defiantly at the challenge, and gave his rupees to the man.

Finally, the ref gave the signal. Freddie and the other man came out and touched their gloves together, and then the match began. It wasn't a very long fight as it turned out. Freddie ducked and feinted this way and that, protecting himself with his gloves upheld in front of his face, but had yet to throw a blow, when suddenly the man undercut him, punching him right in the gut.

"Agh!" Freddie cried out in pain, falling down into a sitting position on the floor. He slung an arm over one of the ropes to support himself.

"Get up, Freddie! Get up!" Brian and Roger shouted, kneeling beside him on the other side of the ropes as the ref came over to count him out.

The other man turned to the cheering audience, his arms raised above his head. "I knew it would be an easy match," he muttered to himself. " _Kamabakht ghondoo_ (fucking faggot)."

"Say that again, darling."

"Huh?" The man turned around, completely confused.

And that's when Freddie punched him directly in the face, laying him out cold. The crowd cheered as the ref knelt by the man counting him out. After the count of ten, the ref waved his arms indicating the man was out, and the match was over. He took the belt from around the man's waist and gave it to Freddie. The crowd went wild as Roger and Brian took him on their shoulders…

After the match, Freddie made sure Javed kept his side of the bet, and despite all his begging and pleading, they stopped in at the nearest tattoo parlour where Javed howled in pain as he got the aforementioned tattoo, and the others looked on and laughed.

*******

"Well that explains the belt and the tattoo," Freddie said, as Javed breathed a sigh of relief, glad the tattoo didn't mean what he'd thought it meant.

"What about what happened to me?" Roger asked.

*******

Apparently, after the boxing match they'd decided to go to another bar to further celebrate Freddie's boxing victory. This particular bar had a stage, near where Freddie and the others were sitting. Soon a man (a pimp looking little man if we're being honest) appeared on the stage announcing there was to be a Bollywood dance contest, for a prize of 7,500 rupees. Not an extreme amount of money, but still nothing to scoff at. 

Roger was sitting by, happily enjoying another beer, when he noticed the others all looking at him. "What?" he asked.

"Oh, Roger…," Brian called to him in a sing-song voice. And there was a mischievous gleam in Freddie's eye that Rodger didn't like the look of.

"No!" he told them. "No fucking way!"...

All the girls were thrilled with their little prank, and helped do Roger's hair, nails, and makeup, and even procured him the beautiful dress and veil from a trunk of costumes kept backstage.

Out front, the men watched the proceedings with an enthusiasm as lukewarm as the beers they sipped. Some of the girls were very pretty, no doubt. And one could do worse than beers and tits on a Thursday night. But when number eight came out, they all ran to the stage, practically salivating with their tongues hanging out. The way she moved so sensually like a goddess, with the bracelets around her wrists and ankles jangling in time with the music; her teasing winks from behind her veil, and the tantalizing way she batted her eyelashes; not to mention her perfect figure, and a midriff that left them begging for more. Yes, there were still more contestants after her, but to the men at least, there was no need to see more. Their minds were made up. Here was the clear and obvious winner. And seeing the reaction of the audience, the little man from earlier came out on the stage to announce just that.

"It appears we have a winner! Contestant number eight!" He shouted to the crowd. Then he turned to Roger. "What was your name, honey?"

Roger only tittered and batted his eyelashes in reply.

"Hmm, not much one for words - an advantage!" the man joked with the other men in the audience. "Here you are, honey. You've earned it," the man said to Roger, handing him the money. Roger took the money tittering and batting his eyelashes again in a show of thanks, as the men clapped and whistled their approval. But then disaster struck. As he was turning to leave, he tripped over the man's microphone cord and fell, revealing to all the world the truth beneath the dress.

A hushed silence fell over the crowd until one man pointed a finger and stated the obvious. "That's no girl - that's a man!"

"We've been tricked!" another man shouted, and suddenly they all began rushing the stage.

Freddie and Brian helped Roger up as the men lurched forward, swiping at his dress. Now it was time for one of Freddie's favorite phrases, 'Take the money and run!', which was exactly what they did - Roger hurriedly stuffing the money in his bra as they ran backstage and out a back door. Aarav, Reyansh, and the others ran out front and met them around back. Not even Aarav and Reyansh could stop this crowd - their only hope lay in flight…

*******

"Well, at least you won first place, darling," Freddie laughed, back in the current moment.

"You always did make such a pretty girl, Roger," Brian teased.

"Shut up!" Roger told them both, a scowl on his face…

*******

When they'd finally stopped running, they found themselves walking along a sidewalk beside a deserted stretch of Juhu beach.

"It's so fucking hot out here," Freddie complained miserably as they plodded along. That was until John, sweet innocent little John, came up with what in their drunken state, seemed like a perfect solution to the problem at hand.

Aarav and Reyansh had been momentarily distracted, looking behind them to make sure they truly had outrun the angry crowd, when they turned back around and noticed their charges were no longer walking in front of them. They turned to the right and saw them all running merrily down the beach, carelessly stripping off clothes as they went and tossing them to the four winds, only to then jump in the waves in the complete raw.

"Hey! Hey!" Aarav and Reyansh shouted, running as fast as they could towards the water. "All of you get out right now! No one is allowed on the beach after midnight! And certainly never naked! You could all be arrested!" Keeping their arses out of jail seemed to fall under the mode of protection.

So they all got out of the water obediently, searching through the sand for their clothes - hence all the sand on the hotel floor and how Freddie and John got their shirts mixed up.

"Sorry, dear," Freddie apologized as Aarav and Reyansh escorted them from the beach. "It was just so hot."

*******

"And the cobra?" Brian asked.

*******

Having left the beach, they were walking back towards the main part of the city, and happened upon a late night market stall that was still open. The stall was situated on a street corner, and the owner was a man selling various assorted items of no particular interest. There was also another man there with him, a snake charmer with a real-life cobra, swaying side to side in time to the music from the man's flute. Suddenly Brian stopped dead in his tracks.

"What is it, darling?" Freddie asked him.

"It's just so sad about the cobras," Brian said.

Freddie didn't say anything, just turned to stare at the snake.

"I mean, can you imagine what it must be like for them?" Brian continued. "They're kept locked up in captivity, crammed in little tiny baskets and boxes all day with barely any room to move. The snake charmers cut out their venom sacs, break off their fangs, or sometimes even sew their mouths shut, so they can work safely with the animals. But snakes can't eat without their fangs, so they slowly starve to death over the course of weeks, or months even. And did you know the snakes aren't really dancing to music? No, that's all just an illusion. Snakes don't even have ears to hear with! Or at least not like we've got," he told them, and the street vendor was starting to look really bloody annoyed with Brian right about now for revealing all the secrets. "The snakes are just responding to the swaying of the snake charmer's flute being shoved in their faces. They see it as a threat to themselves, and that's what causes them to lash out," he went on. "And if I had my way, I'd hunt down all snake charmers in India and free every last cobra."

Freddie stared at the snake a few moments longer, then turned to the owner of the stall. "How much for the cobra?" he asked, taking money out of his pocket.

"No, Freddie, it's too much," Brian protested.

"Now look here, Brian," Freddie said, pointing a finger at him as he swayed unsteadily on his feet. "You're my friend. In fact, you're more than just my friend. You're my-" he paused a moment, temporarily at a loss for words. "-best friend!" he finished. _Yeah that was it._ "I know we fight a lot, but you've always been like a brother to me. And I love you," he said. "I love all of you!" he declared, taking in all of them with a sweeping wave of his arm, including Roger (Kash's husband), who was currently bent double vomiting in the gutter. "Even you!" Freddie told the street vendor.

"Me?" the street vendor asked, eyebrows raised, as Aarav and Reyansh rolled their eyes at this drunken display of emotion.

"I love you too, Freddie," Brian said. "I mean...like you said, as a brother." Then he and Freddie hugged. Finally Freddie pulled back slightly, to look up at Brian's face.

"So, darling, if you want a cobra to liberate him back out into the wild or whatever," he said, his voice thick with emotion. _And fuck! Were those tears in his eyes?_ "Then, by God, you shall have it!" He turned back to the street vendor. "How much?" he asked.

The street vendor thought about it for a moment. It was obvious these were wealthy men. They didn't sound quite like Americans. British maybe. But sure to have lots of money at any rate. And were very clearly drunk. "Hmm. Shall we say 10,000 rupees?" he ventured, which Freddie handed him in cash, not even bothering to haggle. Now the street vendor was kicking himself, wishing he'd asked for more.

"And how much for the snake charmer?" Freddie asked.

"Sorry, sir. The snake charmer isn't for sale," the street vendor told him. _Too fucking bad._

"Fine, darling. Have it your way," Freddie told him. "Just the cobra then."

*******

"Don't worry, Brian," Javed said. "The Indian government has really started cracking down on snake charmers now. I'm sure the animal control men are already releasing him back out into the wild where he belongs, even as we speak."

Brian gave him an appreciative smile.

*******

Finally, it was decided that they should call a ride to come and take them all back to the hotel. But Roger (the other Roger) stopped them.

"Are you mad?!" he asked them, standing up and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when he'd finished being sick. "You can't take a cobra in a car. It's liable to get carsick. And trust me you do not want to deal with a carsick cobra!" he said.

They all just stood there staring at him, trying to reason that out.

"Besides, no driver in his right mind is going to let you bring a snake into his vehicle. It's completely illegal!" he went on.

"Well, what are we meant to do then, darling?" Freddie asked him. "We can't very well walk all the way back to the hotel. It's too far."

"No, no. You must take the train, and just sit the basket there on the seat beside you, see," Roger told them.

No one was in a place to argue with him, and it did _sort of_ make sense. So they walked to the nearest train station. Freddie walked up to the little man behind the window, a huge drunken smile plastered on his face.

"May I help you, sir?" the man asked, laying aside the magazine he'd been reading to pass the time. He wasn't a rock fan, and so didn't know who they were, and honestly didn't care.

"Yes, we'd like to buy a ticket," Freddie told him.

"How many people in your party, sir?" the man asked.

"Ten adults and a cobra," Freddie said.

"Excuse me?" the man asked, a confused, concerned look on his face.

"Ten adults, darling," Freddie repeated.

"Very well, _darling,_ " the man sighed. "Destination?"

"Bombay," Freddie said.

The ticket salesman shook his head. They were already in Bombay, but he didn't get paid enough to argue with drunken people. "The Suburban district or South Bombay?" he asked.

Freddie just stood there looking confused.

The man sighed again. "Sir, where are you trying to arrive at?"

"The hotel," Freddie told him.

"Name?" the man asked.

"Freddie Mercury," Freddie said.

"Not your name! The name of the- Oh, never mind!" The man printed them all tickets to a destination away, far away, from him. But not too far away, just far enough away to teach them a lesson, though if they somehow got lost and ended up somewhere in Delhi, it served them right. "Here you are, sir," he said, handing him the tickets. "Safe journey." And finally they were out of his hair.

So they got on the train, and for the next hour, Aarav and Reyansh pissed their pants laughing as they tried, but failed miserably, to navigate their way - stumbling off at all the wrong stops, then realizing their mistake and getting back on, but on the wrong train! When they finally did arrive in Kalyan, a man from the train had come around to look at their tickets.

"This is your stop - Kalyan," he told them.

"No, no. We're trying to get back to Bombay," Freddie told him.

"Well it says here your destination is Kalyan," the man showed him on the ticket. "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to exit the train."

It was about two o'clock in the morning by then, and they'd all had enough and were in no fit shape to continue.

"Fuck it, darlings!" Freddie said. "We'll figure it out in the morning."

Then they'd gone to the nearest hotel, paid for two rooms, and crashed for the night.

*******

"It's a miracle you didn't end up lost somewhere in Bangalore," Aarav laughed.

They were quickly approaching the hotel now, so they stopped off at a clothing stall so Roger could buy some new clothes, which he changed into in the car.

Now they just needed to come up with their cover story.

"I don't know, Freddie. I don't like to lie…," Brian said.

Freddie sighed. _Brian and his fuckin' sentiments._ "Fine, darling. We'll just say we had a long night. It was late, and we accidentally got on the wrong train on the way back to the hotel, and got lost. All of that's completely true, and there's no need to tell them about the rest."

But when they pulled up in front of the hotel, it was like rats abandoning a sinking ship.

Javed was the first to leave.

"Where are you going?" Freddie asked.

"I'll meet you all in Panchgani," he said. "After I've seen a man about tattoo removal…" he walked away muttering to himself in Hindi.

Then Phoebe. "Er, Freddie. You did say I could have some time off to catch up with some old friends. And I think I'd like to do that now if you don't mind," he said. "I'll freshen up at their house. I'm sure they wouldn't mind." He reached over pulling the boxing belt closer towards him on the seat. "And I'll hold on to this for you, just for the time being."

And what could Freddie say? He had promised him after all.

So the rest of them got out of the car and walked up to the hotel, except for Aarav and Reyansh, who hung back.

"Well, aren't you going to come inside?" Freddie asked them.

"Oh, no, Mr. Mercury. We'll just wait for you here outside," they said.

"Bloody cowards - the lot of you!" Freddie told them.

Roger stuffed the Bollywood dress into a nearby dustbin. Then with a nervous gulp, they all went into the hotel. When the lift opened on the top floor, all the women were waiting for them out in the hallway, arms crossed over their chests.

"Oh, sorry. Wrong floor," Freddie said, pressing the button to close the doors, but Mary put her hand on the door, stopping them.

"Get out," she told them. So they all got out, hanging their heads, and stood beside each other in front of the lift. _This was even scarier than the cobra._

"Darling, I can explain," Freddie began. "You see what happened is-" Then he just abandoned the whole cover story idea completely. "You wouldn't believe what Roger-"

"Me?!" Roger asked incredulously. "What about Brian and his fucking cobra?"

They all began talking over each, pointing the finger until…

"Enough!" Mary shouted. 

There was a hushed silence, followed by, "It was Freddie!" they all declared, pointing their fingers at him. Freddie shot them all dirty looks as they shoved him forward.

Mary paced back and forth in front of them, hands clasped behind her back. "Now, I don't know what happened last night. And I really don't care," she told them calmly. "But what I do know, is that the cars to take us to Panchgani will be here in an hour to pick us up. So you had all better get your _arses_ in the shower - because that perfume can't hide the fact that you reek! You all smell like a bunch of drunken whores."

That remark made Freddie crack up, which caused the others to start snickering as well.

"Oh, you think that's funny do you?" Mary asked.

"No! No, ma'am!" they all cried hastily.

"It's not funny at all," Roger said.

"Right," Mary said, resuming her pacing. "As I was saying before - you had all better get your _arses_ in the shower, clean your teeth, and make yourselves presentable before the cars arrive to take us to Panchgani. _Or else_."

And they were all certain they didn't want to find out what that _or else_ meant.

"Have I made myself quite clear?" Mary asked them.

"Yes! Yes, ma'am," they answered.

"Crystal," Roger added.

"Right." Mary then returned to her room.

The other women stood there shaking their heads at them, before finally walking away themselves.

Once they'd gone, the guys all looked up at each other and grinned. Freddie gave them all a wink, and then they sauntered off to their rooms to take a hot shower and scrub away last night's sins before their trip to Panchgani.


	6. Panchgani

Luckily for them, all the guys were ready to go by the time the cars arrived at the hotel an hour later to pick them up. But as it turned out, the cars weren't actually taking them to Panchgani, but rather to the train station to catch a train from Bombay to Pune, and from there they would travel by private chartered bus the rest of the way to Panchgani. What with both Javed and Phoebe being temporarily absent, it seemed the details had gotten mixed up a bit. But it was quite a happy mistake, as all the children were absolutely thrilled to be riding a real train, something they'd never done before.

"Ooh, Daddy, look at the train!" Kashmira exclaimed. "Are we really going to ride it?"

"Of course!" Freddie told her.

"Yay!" she shouted, jumping up and down.

"Are you excited?" Freddie asked teasingly, as she most obviously was.

"Yeah!"

"Ok, hold tightly to Daddy's hand, alright?" he told her.

"Say, Reyansh," Aarav said in a purposely loud tone to his partner. "Look over there." He indicated with his head in the direction of the ticket counter. "Isn't that the same man from last night?"

"Why yes I believe it is. The one who misprinted the tickets. A complete accident I'm sure," he winked at Aarav. "He must be working a double shift."

"Is that him?" Freddie asked. He handed the children off to Mary, and then he and the other guys began walking towards the ticket counter.

"Darling, where are you going?" Mary called after him. "Javed and Phoebe already have all the tickets arranged, so there's really no need to-"

But Freddie ignored her and walked up to the ticket booth, where he and the others waited, casually leaning on the counter until the man looked up to acknowledge them.

"Hello, darling. Remember us?" Freddie asked.

Suddenly all of the color drained from the man's face. "N-no, sir. I-I'm very sorry to say that I don't," he stuttered. "B-but if you'd like to purchase a ticket, I can-"

"No, no, we've already got all of our tickets, dear, and thank goodness we have too, because you know, something very strange happened when we were here last night, or should I say this morning," Freddie said.

"O-oh, really?" the man asked.

"Yes, you see, this morning about- What was it? 1 AM?" Freddie turned around to ask, and Aarav and Reyansh nodded their heads. "We came through your line here, and bought tickets for Bombay, but somehow we ended up with tickets to Kalyan, which is over an hour away from our hotel."

"W-well, I'm so very sorry to hear that, sir. M-my sincerest apologies. S-sometimes the machines they…H-here. A-allow me to give you a full refund of your money." He wrote a note in the ledger with a shaking hand, and opened the cash drawer. "H-how many were in your party, sir?"

"Ten adults," Freddie told him.

The man dutifully counted out the money, and handed it to Freddie, then took out a handkerchief and began mopping his face. "T-there you are, sir. O-once again, I'm so sorry...A-and...u-uh...i-if you'd like to file a formal complaint-"

"No, no, darling, I'm sure there's no need for all of that!" Freddie told him. "I understand. These things happen sometimes. Like you said, dear, it was probably all just a little mistake with your machine there. Because, I mean, it's so silly of me to even suggest such a thing, but surely you wouldn't have given us the wrong tickets on purpose, right? Just to get rid of us or something like that," Freddie laughed, turning around to the others who laughed as well, making it sound like a joke.

"O-oh, no, sir. I-I assure you I would never-"

"Right. Of course you wouldn't, darling. I just thought perhaps you'd like to get your machine looked at, you know, before it happens again to somebody else."

"O-Oh, yes, sir. I-I'll phone my supervisor right away and-"

"Excellent, darling! You have a wonderful day, dear," Freddie told him with a wink.

"Y-yes, sir. Y-you, too," he said as Freddie walked away. "S-safe journey." He mopped his face again, and blew out a sigh of relief.

The train journey was to be quite a long one - three or four hours, which Freddie hated because he got so bored. So Mary steeled herself, thinking it would be like the aeroplane trips all over again. But Freddie was unusually quiet as he stared out the window, lost in his wandering thoughts as he watched the Indian countryside slowly passing by.

So much so that Mary asked him, "Are you alright, darling?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said, turning towards her. "In fact, I'm better than fine. How could I possibly be doing anything less than sparkling when I've got all my darlings here with me?" he asked, hugging Kashmira and Little Freddie close and giving them each a kiss. But Mary could see past the smile, to the hint of something flickering in his eyes. And there was a slight trace of nervousness in his voice when he asked her, "We're not going straight to the school when we arrive, are we? Or…?" Though he hid it well as always.

"No, darling. That's tomorrow," Mary told him. "From what I've heard from Javed and Phoebe, the school's prepared a very special little celebration for you. All the boys are very excited to be meeting their rock star idol. But today's all about just getting there, and getting checked into the hotel and things like that."

"Ok," Freddie nodded his head, and he seemed a bit better after that. He looked down at Kashmira and Little Freddie. "You know when Daddy was a little boy, I used to make the trip to school with my father. We'd leave from Zanzibar on a great big ship to come to Bombay. But we weren't there for just a few hours, or a few days even. No, we were there for eight whole weeks," he told them.

"Eight weeks!" Little Freddie said. "That's a long time!"

"It is. It's a very long time," Freddie agreed. "It was sort of an adventure, like the kind you read about in fairy tales. At least that's the way I told myself to look at it. And then I'd take the train all by myself from Bombay to Pune, just like we're doing now, except it wasn't called Pune then. It was called Poona. But anyway, and then from there I'd take the bus to Panchgani where I went to school." There was a sort of faraway look in his eye after he'd finished speaking, but he quickly snapped out of it.

"Well, anyway, enough about that for now. Have you all been enjoying yourselves and having a good time?" he asked, to which they all agreed. "Yeah? What's been your favourite part so far?"

Kashmira said her favourite part had been when she and Little Freddie had gotten to ride the little Ferris wheel together at Chowpatty beach.

"Yes, that was a lot of fun, wasn't it?" Freddie smiled at her affectionately. 

Little Freddie agreed that had been one of his favourite parts as well, along with swimming in the various hotel swimming pools with Felix, Jimmy, and Robert.

Mary's favourite part had been sunbathing by the pool, and shopping at the market in Bombay.

And Jim had enjoyed the spice tour he and Freddie had gone on together in Zanzibar, and also the Hanging Gardens of Malabar Hill that they'd visited where the hedges had been sculpted into various animal shapes.

"And what about you?" Mary asked Freddie.

"My favourite part's just been being here with all of you, and having a good time," Freddie said with a smile. "But uh..the spice tour was very nice. And the Hanging Gardens were really stunning. Of course I absolutely loved the Kala Ghoda Art Precinct and Bollywood. And shopping in the market. I honestly don't think I could pick just one, you know. I've loved it all!"

Freddie and the others did the best they could to fight their hangovers with drinks of coconut water and Darjeeling tea with honey, lemon, and ginger; as well as a lunch of _samosas_ and _aloo chaat_ , with curd rice at the end for dessert. And for the children there was _maggi_ (noodles) with cheese.

Then came the _fantastic drowse_ as Roger called it, that always accompanied a good meal, and it seemed it was time for a nap. Warmed by the rays of the sun coming in through the window, Freddie leaned back comfortably against the seat, his eyes getting heavier and heavier by the moment. The sound and feel of the wheels rumbling beneath the floor, rocking the train to the gentle beat, and the rhythm of the rail, soon had him lulled fast-asleep…

*******

_The sound of children's laughter came to him from somewhere far away…_

_"Freddie!"_

_He opened his eyes to a familiar scene. He was back on the grounds of St. Peter's. In front of him a group of younger boys laughed and giggled, shoving and jostling each other for position as they crowded around a peephole in the wall with a direct view into the older boys' showers._

_"No! Stop! Get away from there!" Freddie shouted, running towards them with arm outstretched. But halfway there he was stopped dead in his tracks when he heard a voice calling his name._

_"Freddie! Freddie!"_

_"Huh?" He spun around. Shielding his eyes from the sun, he looked up into the cloudless blue sky where the voice seemed to be emanating from…_

*******

"Freddie! Freddie!"

He awoke to Mary gently shaking his shoulder and calling his name.

"We're here," she smiled softly when he opened his eyes.

They had arrived in Pune, their half-way stop in between Bombay and Panchgani.

"You know one of the first concerts I ever attended was right here in Pune," Freddie commented to Brian as they waited while their luggage was unloaded from the train and onto their private chartered bus. "It was Lata Mangeshkar. They used to call her The Nightingale of India, and she was absolutely wonderful!"

The train ride had been fun for something new and different for a change. But Freddie thought it was nice now that they were all together instead of separated by compartments like they had been in the train. Even so, after a little while boredom began to slowly creep its way in.

"I wish somebody had thought to bring a Scrabble board or something," Freddie lamented, resting his chin in his hand.

"Well, actually…" Brian stood up and began rummaging through one of his bags in the luggage rack. "My wish is your command!" He pulled out both a Scrabble and Trivial Pursuit board. "I figured these might come in handy at some point during our trip," he said. "I've got Scrabble and Trivial Pursuit. Which would you prefer?"

Freddie of course selected Scrabble, which he, Brian, Roger, and John played, while a group of the others took the Trivial Pursuit. It kept Freddie's thoughts focused, and everyone sufficiently entertained until their arrival in Panchgani a little over two hours later.

As promised, Javed met them at the hotel in Panchgani, after a very painful first tattoo removal session.

"Welcome - Ah! - to Panchgani," he announced in a strained voice, rubbing with one hand at his lower back.

*******

Mary noticed that since their arrival in Panchgani, Freddie had that same air of constantly being on guard, tense, and on edge. It was something Jim noted as well later on when he and Freddie were alone together in their room.

"Do you want something to eat?" Jim asked, currently enjoying a delicious dish of _misal pav_.

Freddie was out on the balcony, smoking a cigarette. "No, dear, you go ahead," he told him, taking a drag. "I'm not that hungry." He took a sip of the Stoli in his glass. Champagne just wasn't cutting it tonight - not even Cristal.

What with it having been a very arduous day of travel, and another big day planned for them tomorrow, Jim figured Freddie would want to turn in early.

"Aren't you coming to bed?" Jim asked. Freddie was back out on the balcony again having another cigarette and drink - this time in his boxer shorts, after having finished his nighttime routine. Freddie didn't answer, but crushed out his cigarette and tossed back the rest of the vodka. Then he came back inside and climbed into bed beside Jim, but just as Jim was reaching to turn out the light, Freddie stopped him.

"Wait!" he said. "Come on, let's stay up for a little while."

So they sat up in bed watching television together, but no matter how hard Jim tried to fight it, his eyelids kept closing more and more until he only had a narrow slit of vision. Then suddenly he jerked awake, having completely nodded off without realizing it.

"I'm sorry, Freddie. I'm about to fall asleep," he apologized. 

They turned off the lights, and Freddie reluctantly lay down in the bed with Jim cuddled up close. Jim would do everything in his power to keep Freddie safe from any harm, even to the detriment of his own health and well-being, but there were just some things Jim couldn't protect him from. Freddie lay there awake in the dark for a long while, a trillion and one thoughts swarming through his mind like a horde of angry hornets, but it had been a long, tiring day, and eventually his body had no choice but to give in to the need for sleep…

*******

_"Freddie! Freddie, help me!"_

_Freddie's eyes snapped open. He was back in the same scene as before, only this time one of the older boys, a seventeen-year-old named Robert, and one of the school's masters (head boy/prefect), had emerged from the showers, and nabbed the smallest of the younger boys, Michael. Robert, an unattractive, overweight, and reprehensible individual, held the younger boy completely at his mercy._

_"You bunch of fairies been spying on us while we were bathing, have you?"_

_"Let him go!" Freddie shouted, running at him._

_"No! It's either him or I tell the headmaster about all of you! He'll tell your fathers and you know what'll happen then!"_

_All of the other boys shrank back._

_"Freddie! Freddie, please, help me," Michael begged with tears in his eyes._

_"Take me instead," Freddie said._

_Robert slowly looked him up and down, studying him. "Alright. Fine!" he said at last, shoving the other boy roughly aside._

_"Run, Freddie! Run!" Michael shouted._

*******

Freddie awoke, petrified. But it was only Jim bringing him his morning cup of tea.

"I know Phoebe always brings you your cup of tea at eight o'clock, but seeing as how you've given him a few days off, I thought I'd be the one to bring it to you today," Jim smiled. He'd gone out early to the shops to find Freddie the Earl Grey tea he loved. He'd had a hell of a time, but eventually found some. Then he'd come back and prepared it using a tea kettle he'd gotten from room service. He'd even added a little milk and two sugars, just how Freddie liked it.

Freddie sat up and forced a smile on his face so as not to let Jim see how shaken he was. "Ah! Giving Phoebe a run for his money, are you? Thank you, darling," He reached up and gave Jim a kiss. "That's very, very nice. You're too good to me, you know. I don't know what I'd ever do without you."

Jim sat beside him on the bed as he drank his tea. "Are you sure you're alright, Freddie?" he asked. "I know you didn't feel like eating last night, so I thought maybe you aren't feeling well."

"No, no. I'm fine, darling, don't worry," Freddie told him. "It's just tension and a little bit of nerves to be honest. And you're right - I didn't feel like eating last night, but I'd quite like something now, actually," he said, if nothing else than to reassure Jim that he was alright.

So they had a breakfast of _kachori_ , a sort of Indian version of scrambled eggs that Phoebe often prepared for Freddie at home. As well as a glass of pink champagne on Freddie's part, which made Jim feel a bit consternated. _They had pink champagne here at the hotel but not Earl Grey tea?_ Anyway, he felt better seeing Freddie eat. But Freddie was the master of moving food around the plate to give the appearance of having eaten a good amount, when in reality he'd eaten very little.

They weren't supposed to arrive at the school until 12 PM, but those short four hours quickly slipped by, most of which Freddie spent outside on the balcony with a cigarette and drink as he had the night before. And before any of them knew it, the cars were there to take them to the school.

Freddie put on a brave face and got into the car with the others, who all seemed terribly excited.

"Well, this should be interesting," Brian smiled. "Getting to see where the great Mr. Mercury made his start."

Freddie gave him a closed lip smile in return, and with his dark sunglasses hiding his eyes, to the average person he looked as cool as cucumber, like he did this sort of thing every day.

But Mary was smarter than most, and kept a close watchful eye over him. Even so, it wasn't until they were pulling up in front of the school, that she happened to glance down and see that Freddie's knuckles were white from where he was gripping the arm rests. And she knew then that something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

"Freddie?" She reached out and touched his arm. But it was too late. The car door was already being opened, and in that instant he was no longer himself, but Freddie Mercury, the rock star that everyone expected him to be. It was showtime. He'd been given his cue, and the rest no long mattered, despite whatever else may have been happening inside...


	7. St. Peter's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, as of yesterday afternoon, my job has been closed down for the next 3 weeks due to coronavirus, so I've been quite prolific today. It's the first time I've ever been getting paid while writing, my dears. 😂 Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.

One of the little boys held the limousine door open for them, while the rest of the boys and school staff stood in a crowd in front of the school gates. The boys all cheered, waving signs they had made. Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John thanked the little boy who had held the door, and then came over and began signing autographs for the others.

"Hello," Freddie greeted them.

"How are you boys doing today?" Brian asked.

"This looks like a very nice school you've got here," Roger said.

A little boy of about seven or eight, lost for words in his excitement, simply reached out and hugged John, who reciprocated with a large smile.

"Welcome to St. Peter's School, Panchgani," the principal, one Mr. Morris W. Innis, welcomed them once they'd worked their way down the line.

"Yes, thank you very much for having us," Freddie thanked him, and they all shook his hand.

The first thing on the agenda was lunch, served directly from St. Peter's own kitchen. Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John sat down right at one of the tables to eat with the boys. Whilst they were eating, Freddie looked around surreptitiously, then pinched off a piece of flatbread which he then flicked at Roger, making the boys chuckle. Roger looked up with a grin and retaliated with a lentil, and then threw a pea at John, who launched back a grain of rice. Soon an all-out war of tiny missiles and projectiles was underway, until the principal walked by with a loud, "Ahem!" Freddie, Roger, and John all pointed their fingers at a completely unsuspecting Brian who, absorbed in his meal, had been quite oblivious to the battle ensuing around him. He looked around at them, mouthing _what?_ , and then looked up at the principal who only smiled and continued his stroll amongst the tables.

Then they were taken to the auditorium where a group of boys had dressed up like The Hectics, the first band Freddie had formed with his schoolmate friends right here at St. Peter's. Dressed in the standard of white shirts, black ties, pleated trousers and identically greased hair, they played a couple of lively boogie-woogie cover songs from Elvis Presley, Cliff Richard, Fats Domino, and Little Richard. Then after the last song, the boy at the piano, the one who was supposed to be Freddie, began playing and singing Bohemian Rhapsody. Everybody cheered and Freddie smiled with pride as he watched. At the end, Freddie and some of the other original members of The Hectics, those who had managed to attend, came up on stage and posed for pictures with the boys.

However, his classmates, though happy to see him, found it difficult to connect. He was no longer the Freddie they knew, but then again they weren't the same boys they had been at school either. They led completely different lives now - too different from each other. And they could no longer relate.

Next they were taken to the gymnasium where Freddie was challenged to a table tennis match against one of the older boys - the school's current reigning champion. The boy was good. Very good. But Freddie was still better, and won in the end.

"Good game," Freddie told him, shaking his hand, and he posed for another picture with the boy.

Then there was a boxing match, which Freddie and the others all watched with great entertainment. And at the end Freddie posed for yet another picture with both boys.

After that, there was one more small ceremony in which Queen presented an autographed copy of each of their records for inclusion in the school's collection for the use of all the boys.

And finally they were to finish up with a tour of the campus and grounds. But before that, Little Freddie came up to his mother.

"Mummy, can I go and play cricket with the other boys?" he asked.

"It's _may I_ , Freddie," Mary corrected him. "And ask your father."

Little Freddie ran over to his father. "Daddy, may I go and play cricket with the other boys?" he asked. "Please," he begged, and Freddie could see in his eyes that this was something he really wanted to do. He looked behind Little Freddie to where a group of boys his age were waiting just as anxiously hoping he would say yes.

"I'll go with him and keep an eye on him," Aarav offered. Freddie looked his way, and then turned back to his son.

"Alright, but you're to mind Aarav just as you would mind me, and do as he says. You understand?"

"Yes, Daddy. Thank you! Thank you!" Little Freddie gave him a quick hug.

"Alright." Freddie kissed him on the head and sent him on his way.

The other boys cheered and led the way to the cricket pitch.

"Thank you for looking after him," Freddie said to Aarav.

"Of course!" Aarav replied with a smile. "I used to play cricket when I was his age. And I must say I was quite good too." Then he turned and followed the boys outside.

Their first stop on the tour of the campus was a sort of records room where in the school's journals it was marked down the dates of Freddie's enrollment (as Farrokh Bomi Bulsara on Monday, February 14, 1955) and departure from St. Peter's (Monday, February 25, 1963), the various plays he had performed in (usually women's parts), the festivities he had taken part in (by himself and then later with The Hectics), as well as his performance in sports - boxing, cricket, table tennis (at which he had excelled), and cross-country running (at which he'd been absolutely dismal). They even had a copy of Freddie's very first essay he'd ever written - which everyone wanted to read of course. And they had the picture of when he'd been awarded the trophy for Best All-Rounder, Junior.

"Oh, my God! I can't believe you still have all of these things!" Freddie said, gently touching the dusty frame.

"Of course!" The principal, Mr. Innis, replied with a smile. "Here at St. Peter's we're very proud of our most famous alumni."

Next they were shown the classrooms, which had seemingly changed very little since Freddie had been here. He soon found himself lost in memory, remembering back to a time when he'd only just begun to discover his own sexuality. He'd formed a sort of crush on his teacher at the time, Mr. Davis. He'd always been kind to Freddie and encouraged him and The Hectics in their musical pursuits. It had been once, bored with his maths lessons and doodling in his notebook, that he'd begun daydreaming about what it would be like if he just reached up and kissed Mr. Davis. Perhaps he'd take a chance when he was leaning over him trying to explain something to him. He imagined Mr. Davis smiling and blushing like a fool, a hand held to his cheek. Then he and his classmates bursting out into a song and dance number like in the Hollywood movies the school showed sometimes (Cue Abba's [ _When I Kissed The Teacher_ ](https://youtu.be/BWnKGYnuE8o)). He was rudely brought back to reality by a sharp whack across the knuckles with a ruler.

"Bulsara, pay attention!" the principal, Mr. O. D. Bason, commanded, on his daily patrol of the classrooms.

Then they were taken to the dormitories.

"I was in the Ashleigh house," Freddie told them. 

These too were barely different, despite how many years he'd been away. Sadly, Freddie remembered it had also been Mr. Davis who had taken him to the principal's office after a fight had broken out in the dormitory between himself and Bruce Murray.

Freddie and the other boys had all been in the dormitory, when suddenly Bruce had started to hit him.

"Let's box, Bucky!" he said. And although Freddie said no, he just started. Within just a few moments, and quite against his will, there was a boxing match going on, and he was in the middle of it. The boys were all screaming and shouting, and throwing pillows at them. Because of the noise, Mr. Davis suddenly entered the dormitory and stopped the fight. Bruce lied and said Freddie was the one who started the fight, and that he was just defending himself. All the boys backed him up, so Mr. Davis had had no other choice but to take Freddie to Mr. Bason's office, though it was with great sadness and remorse in his eyes that he did so. Mr. Bason decided Freddie had to be punished, and what a terrible punishment they picked for him. Freddie was made to go to the barber shop and have his hair cut really short. He hated Bruce for that. He loved his hair, and now it would never be the same again. He would even have preferred to receive "six of the best" with the cane (he'd got quite a lot of those in his time here too), rather than face this punishment. He was so angry, sad, and upset at this terrible injustice done to him, that he even wrote a letter home to his parents about it later, but of course there was nothing to be done about it.

It was as they were exiting the dormitories, that Kashmira made it known to her mother that she needed to use the toilet.

"Excuse me, where are your loos?" Mary asked politely.

"Right this way, ma'am," one of the school staff said, guiding Mary and Kashmira down the hall.

Mr. Innis continued on with the tour. "And if you'd all like to step this way, I'll show you the grounds, starting with our beautifully manicured garden…"

The others all began following him out the door, talking and laughing amongst themselves, but Freddie couldn't move. It was as if his feet were frozen to the floor - all his muscles locked up tight. _Just stop it, Freddie_ , he chided himself. _Pull yourself together goddamn it. There's nothing out there to hurt you. Just a bunch of flowers, shrubbery, and trees, that's all._ So then why was he shivering?...

***BONUS* Here's some pictures from Freddie's time at St. Peter's.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***TRIGGER WARNING*** Remembered past rape/non-con (underage) & sexual violence in the next chapter. The rape scene parts are marked with *** symbols at the beginning and end, and are also in italics font, so you can skip past them if you would prefer not to read them. They can be skipped and the story still understood without reading them.***
> 
> It is something that supposedly really happened to Freddie when he was fourteen-years-old at St. Peter's boarding school according to the book Freddie Mercury by David Bret.


	8. Look What They've Done To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***TRIGGER WARNING*** Remembered past rape/non-con (underage) & sexual violence in this chapter. The rape scene parts are marked with *** symbols at the beginning and end, and are also in italics font, so you can skip past them if you would prefer not to read them. The story can still be understood without reading them. They can be skipped and the story still understood without reading them.***
> 
> This is something that supposedly really happened to Freddie when he was fourteen-years-old at St. Peter's boarding school according to the book Freddie Mercury by David Bret.

"You coming, Freddie?" Brian asked, holding the door for him.

His heart was savagely pounding in his chest and his throat felt tight, like it might close up. A lump formed in his throat, choking him. But he swallowed hard, and was somehow able to speak. "Yes, yes. I was just…"

"Mm, I know what you mean," Brian smiled at him warmly. "This place must bring back a lot of memories for you."

It was like wading through deep water, but through sheer force of will, Freddie made himself walk forward, following Brian outside.

Freddie looked neither left nor right, but instead focused in on what was directly in front of him - Brian's massive mane of curls. And he thought he'd never been more grateful for them in all his life. They formed a sort of comforting shield, blocking his vision. In fact, he wished he could just bury his whole head in there - there was so much of it, he wasn't sure Brian would even notice. He could just see it now.

Brian: Has anyone seen Freddie?

Roger: Er, Brian…

Freddie nearly laughed to himself imagining it. _Well, this wasn't so bad!_ , he tried to convince himself. He was outside now, and nothing bad had happened to him so far. The cool air of the garden was refreshing after the heat and stuffiness of the school. And if he could just stay here behind Brian until they got out of the garden, he knew he'd be alright. _Besides, it couldn't possibly still be here after all this time! That had been over twenty-four years ago!_ But Brian, who along with Jim, shared a deep passion and love for gardening, was taking his sweet time, taking in all the various flora and fauna.

"Hello, Mr. Bird!" Brian called up to a bird perched on a limb nearby, and Freddie couldn't help but roll his eyes. Then Brian happened to glance down, and noticed one of his shoelaces had come undone.

"Oh, bother," he sighed, bending down to do them up again. "I should have done these up in a double knot. You know, I nearly wore my clogs today, but I knew we'd be doing a lot of walking, so I thought I'd better not. Clogs aren't exactly conducive for that sort of thing. There. That's better." He stood up and that's when he noticed Freddie staring at what appeared to be some sort of old gardener's shed. "What's that?" he asked. But from Freddie there was no reply. Brian turned to look at him again. Freddie was breathing so hard; a cold sweat had broken out on his forehead and he was trembling. "Freddie, what is it? What's the matter? What's wrong?" Brian asked. "Freddie, what's going on? What's happening?"

But Freddie couldn't answer him. His vision had shrunk down to a narrow field, fuzzy and blurred at the edges, as if he were looking through a tunnel, with the garden shed at the end. And Brian's voice was distorted and muffled, like it was coming to him from some underwater place far away.

"Don't move, Freddie. Just stay right here. I'm going to go get you some help."

*******

_But Freddie wasn't there anymore…_

_"Run, Freddie! Run!"_

_But it was too late. Robert was on him in less than a second, and had overpowered him. He gripped Freddie by the upper arm, hard enough to leave finger shaped bruises, and dragged him across the yard, drawing ever closer to the old gardener's shed._

_"No! No!" Freddie cried, struggling against his grasp, but it was useless._

_Arriving at the shed, Robert flung open the door and shoved Freddie inside. He came inside and slammed the door shut, bolting it closed behind him. He grabbed Freddie, slamming his back up against a work bench along the wall._

_"Please! Don't!" Freddie begged._

_"Shut up!" Robert stomped on Freddie's foot as hard as he could, then kneed him in the groin, and punched him in the stomach - making sure not to strike him anywhere that wouldn't be covered by clothing. "You wanted this, right? You and all the other fairies. So now you'll take it like the little bitch that you are!" He spun Freddie around, bending him over the work table, and forced him down until Freddie's cheek was lying against the wood. Freddie tried desperately to get up, but Robert pressed an elbow down into his back. His trousers and underpants were yanked down from behind, and a meaty hand came around to cover his mouth, muffling his cries. Then came a sharp, white-hot pain, like a fire poker stabbing him over and over again, threatening to rip him in two. And he was helpless to do anything except take it, as he lay there and sob. The pain continued until, finally, there came a sort of shuddering gasp from Robert. Suddenly all movement ceased, Robert panting, out of breath behind him. Then Robert withdrew and Freddie was released, shoved aside roughly, where he fell down hard, smacking his naked bottom on the dirt ground, his trousers and underpants still at his thighs. Robert put himself away, zipped up, and adjusted his trousers, tucking in his shirt. "You tell anyone about this, Bucky, and you remember what I said is going to happen. I'll tell the headmaster all about what sort of tricks you've been up to - you and the other poofters. He'll tell your fathers, and then you'll all be sent down. They don't allow faggots at this school." He stepped over Freddie and exited the shed, leaving Freddie there alone. Freddie sat there a long time, trapped in a daze. Finally he pulled himself up and fixed his clothing. Then he turned around, placing his hand on the door. The metal was burning hot, scorching his hand, but he didn't care. He stared down at it with indifference as if it weren't really his hand at all, but someone else's. He pushed the door open and stepped out into the sunlight. It was a beautiful day, although sweltering. Big puffy clouds skittered across the baby blue sky, as birds happily chirped and sang together in the trees. A cooling breeze sprang up, rustling the leaves of the trees, and his hair. Freddie stood there blinking as the blinding rays of the sun beat down on him. Then he turned and slowly walked away…_

*******

Brian didn't want to leave Freddie alone, but he knew he had to go for help. He ran a short distance up the path until he came upon Roger and John who were stood together talking.

"Oh there you are, Brian," Roger said. "We were wondering what happened to you and Freddie." Then he noticed the look on Brian's face, and that he was out of breath. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Freddie's having some sort of attack - anxiety or panic. I'm not sure," he told them.

"Well, what do we do?" Roger asked anxiously.

"Well, the first thing is to stay calm, and not panic ourselves," Brian said. "Roger, could you go and fetch Jim and Javed? And try not to alarm Freddie's parents and sister."

"Right," Roger said, and he took off in that direction.

"And John, if you wouldn't mind coming and staying with Freddie for a moment, I'll go and talk to Mary," Brian said.

So he and John went back down the path to where Freddie was.

John approached Freddie slowly so as not to startle him, and was careful not to get too close or touch him. "Freddie, it's John here. Roger's just gone to get Jim. They'll be here any moment."

Just then Mary and Kashmira were coming out of the door, having just returned from the loos. Brian came up to them. He smiled down sweetly at Kashmira. "You stay right here, honey. I'm just going to borrow your Mummy for a second, alright?" He took Mary aside, and explained to her what was going on.

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed, placing her hands over her mouth. "I knew there was something off about him since yesterday when we got on the train to come here," she said.

"Don't worry. He'll be alright," Brian assured her. "Has this kind of thing ever happened before? Is he taking any medications or…"

"No, no. Nothing like this has ever happened before. I've never seen him like this. I-I don't know about the medications. Phoebe or Liza would be the ones to ask about that. They handle all those sorts of things for him," Mary told him.

"Right. We need to get him out of here as quickly as possible and back to the hotel. Do you think you could sort of gather everyone up and…"

"Yes, of course," Mary said. She went back over and took Kashmira by the hand. "Come along, darling."

Brian hurried back to where John and Freddie were. Just then Roger returned with Jim and Javed in tow. When he'd approached the group, he'd tried to keep the worry out of his voice, and simply said, "Er, Jim, Freddie needs you for a moment. And Javed, Brian would like a quick word if you don't mind." Then on the way back, once they were out of earshot, he'd told them what was happening. And Jim said no, he'd never seen or known Freddie to have any sort of attacks of any kind.

"Javed, do you happen to have the number to where Phoebe is staying?" Brian asked.

"Y-yes, yes," Javed stuttered in reply. Unfolding a piece of paper from his pocket, with trembling hands he dialed the numbers on the huge cellular phone he always carried with him at all times. The line rang and rang, but there was no answer.

"What about Liza at Garden Lodge?" Brian asked.

Javed dialed the number, and Joe picked up right away. 

"Garden Lodge, Mercury residence."

Brian took the phone from Javed, and explained the situation to Joe. Joe said that yes, over the years he had seen Freddie have one anxiety attack after another. But that he knew of, Freddie wasn't on any sort of medications for it, and oftentimes the only thing to do was to pin him down until the anxiety had passed. Though they should be very careful, as sometimes it could turn quite violent. One time during the middle of an attack, Freddie’s hand shot up and went straight for Joe’s throat. He was like a drowning man clutching for air. ‘Freddie, calm down. Freddie, calm down,’ Joe said. He freed himself from Freddie’s grip and eventually calmed him down.

Brian thanked Joe and said he hoped it wouldn't come down to that. Then just as they'd hung up, the phone rang again. It was Phoebe calling back. Brian told Phoebe what was going on, and surprisingly, it seemed that Phoebe too was aware of Freddie's issues with anxiety. He said that on two occasions Barbara Valentin, who had been called first by Winnie (one of Freddie's earlier boyfriends from Germany), telephoned him to go over to help Freddie who had seemed to have suffered a sort of fit. He had apparently just blacked out but then had displayed symptoms of severe shaking. They just had to hold him steady and still until the tremors passed whereupon he would regain consciousness. Doctors were obviously called and they diagnosed the results of too much alcohol and use of drugs, but Phoebe wasn't so sure. Freddie being Freddie merely brushed the episodes aside when they asked him about them and how he was feeling. There was no pattern for these attacks and Freddie displayed no concern.

And unbeknownst to all of them, Barbara Valentin (another one of Freddie's German lovers) had also been witness to more of Freddie's attacks, apart from just the two incidents Phoebe had mentioned. She'd once found him in a kind of trance, beating his head against a radiator till both were covered with blood. And another time Barbara had to be rescued by her assistant when Freddie began to strangle her in his sleep. But Freddie had no idea he was doing these things. And yet another time Freddie had gotten sick for no apparent reason. He was taken ill in her apartment and she didn’t know what to do. She called her gynaecologist, whom she trusted as a friend. He came right over, and found Freddie quite delirious. Suddenly he woke up in a terrible state. She said, “It’s OK, this is my gynaecologist.” “Oh my God, I can’t believe it,” said Freddie. “Am I pregnant?”’

Phoebe also denied Freddie being on any sort of medications for anxiety, but said that he was leaving for Panchgani now, and would be there as soon as possible. They rang off, and after a quick discussion, it was decided that Brian and Jim should be the ones to approach Freddie. So everyone else moved back to give them some room.

"Freddie, it's Brian and Jim," Brian said gently. "I think you might be having an anxiety or panic attack. But don't worry. There's no need to be frightened or scared. You're alright. You're okay. You're here with us - all of us. Roger and John are here too. And you're safe." Brian stopped a short distance away, and let Jim go on from there alone, but he continued talking calmly to Freddie. "Jim's just going to put his hand on your shoulder. Is that alright? Careful, Jim," he warned.

As soon as Jim's fingers touched his shoulder, Freddie snapped. "Don't touch me! Get off of me! Leave me alone! Let go of me you bastard son of a bitch!"

"Jim! Jim! Get back!" Brian shouted, concerned for Jim's safety.

But Jim just put his arms around Freddie and hugged him close, blocking Freddie's sight of the gardener's shed as he did so. "Shhh. Shhh. I've got you. I've got you," he soothed, holding him tight.

As soon as he could no longer see the shed, Freddie was instantly back. He stood there blinking rapidly, and behind his sunglasses tears slipped out of the corners of his eyes of their own accord.

"Hey. Hey, Freddie. You alright? You okay?" Brian asked.

Freddie made as if to begin speaking several times, but no words came out.

"Come on," Jim said. "Let's get you out of here."

Brian, Roger, John, and Jim formed a close circle around Freddie, with Javed leading the way. Just then a man came out of the door from the school and into the garden. 

"Excuse me. Sir." Javed stopped the man. "Could you please tell us how to get to the front of the building from here?"

"Of course," the man said. "If you'll just follow the building around this way-" he pointed to his left, "-it'll lead you directly to the front gates."

They thanked the man, grateful they wouldn't have to try and take Freddie all the way back through the entire school.

But in their rush, all of them failed to notice the man watching from a grassy knoll nearby…

Once they were around front, Javed quickly hustled Freddie and the others into one of the waiting limousines, which immediately set off for the hotel. Then he returned to where the rest of the group were congregated.

Mary was just telling the others about Freddie when Javed arrived. She merely told them he wasn't feeling well, avoiding going into any further detail. Then she turned to Reyansh. "Would you please be so kind as to go and fetch Aarav and my son from the cricket pitch? Thank you." Reyansh went straightway and soon returned with Aarav and Little Freddie following behind him.

"What's wrong, Mummy?" Little Freddie asked.

"Nothing's wrong, darling," she told him. "Daddy just isn't feeling well, and he's gone back to the hotel to lie down for a bit. It's about time we were leaving anyway. Besides, look at the state of you!" She took his face in her hands. Little Freddie was red-faced and dripping sweat. "You need a rest." She smiled, smoothing his hair affectionately.

"Thank you so much for having us," she thanked the principal, Mr. Innis, taking his hands warmly in hers. "It means so much to all of us to be able to come here, especially Freddie."

Afterwards they too returned to the limousines and were taken back to the hotel.

*******

"How are you feeling, Freddie?" Brian asked with concern, handing Freddie a bottle of water as they were on their way back to the hotel.

"Don't worry about it, mate," Roger told him. "That sort of thing can happen to anyone."

"Of course!" John chimed in.

"Absolutely!" Brian agreed.

"I mean God! It was so hot! And getting even hotter," Roger said.

"I personally was burning up out there," Brian added.

"Sweltering," John said.

Suddenly Freddie slammed his fist down on the armrest beside him. Then he pressed the button to lower the window slightly, letting in a little fresh air to blow across his face.

The rest of the car ride was quiet, with the others offering their silent support.

When they arrived at the hotel they helped Freddie up to his and Jim's room.

"Don't you worry about anything, Freddie, alright?" Brian said.

"You just get some rest," John told him.

"Yeah, mate. And we'll come by and check on you later," Roger nodded.

After Freddie and Jim had gone inside, Brian turned to the others. "Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I could certainly use a drink after that."

"Me too," Roger said.

"Me three," John agreed. 

So they went to the bar downstairs to have a drink out on the patio.

*******

As soon as he and Jim came into the room, Freddie went into the bathroom and closed the door. After a little while when he didn't emerge, Jim got a little worried and went and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Freddie, you alright in there?" he asked. There was no reply but then Jim heard the shower running, so that made him feel better. Maybe a nice cool shower was exactly what Freddie needed. He closed the blinds and turned on the ceiling fan so Freddie could rest when he got out.

In the shower, Freddie turned the water on as hot as it would go until it was nearly burning his skin. He lathered up and scrubbed at his body furiously, as if by doing so he could remove the memory from his skin. But even in here he wasn't safe.

_For a moment he was back there again. He'd waited until the showers were abandoned. He shoved his ripped, bloody trousers and underpants to the bottom of a dustbin, then went into one of the empty stalls to try and wash away the aftermath...and the blood. The dried blood from the earlier assault was turned liquid once more by the water. It being Saturday, thankfully the water was warm. Freddie watched with feelings of detachment as the red droplets dripped down his legs and onto the shower floor before being washed down the drain…_

Suddenly he was back. But the blood was still there.

"Jim! Jim! T-there's blood! I'm-I'm bleeding!"

Jim nearly burst down the door, and was by Freddie's side in less than a second.

"Freddie, are you alright? What happened? Did you cut yourself?" Jim found the blood was coming from a place on Freddie's leg where he must have somehow cut himself on the shower door without realizing it.

"It's alright, Freddie. It's just a scratch," Jim assured him.

He helped Freddie into the bedroom area and sat him on the end of the bed.

"Just keep this pressed on there," Jim told him, handing him a hand towel. "And I'll be right back."

Jim flew down to the front desk to ask if they had any first aid supplies. He soon returned with a bottle of antiseptic, with which he used to clean the wound, and then applied a small gauze bandage.

After everything that had happened, Freddie was completely exhausted.

Jim fetched him a pair of boxer shorts. "You lie down," he told him. "I'll tidy up in the bathroom." When he'd finished doing that, he came back into the room and found Freddie curled up on his side in the bed. Jim turned off the lights and lay down beside Freddie, cuddling up close. But Freddie flinched at his touch, so Jim gave him some space. "If you need anything, Freddie, I'm right here," he said.

_That night Freddie had lain awake, curled up on his side in his bed, with the sounds of the other sleeping boys all around him._

_"Freddie," Michael called in a whisper, leaning over towards him. "Freddie, what happened?"..._

After a little while it seemed Freddie finally drifted off to sleep. Only then did Jim consider stepping out of the room to stretch his legs and get some fresh air, but only just for a moment in case Freddie woke up and needed him. He met Mary in the hallway.

"How's Freddie?" she asked.

"I think he's doing okay," Jim told her. "He had a shower and now he's resting." He decided not to mention to her about Freddie cutting himself in the shower, afraid it would lead to an interrogation from her.

"Mm. Alright," Mary said, seemingly satisfied, and returned to her and the children's room.

*******

"Something terrible must have happened to him in that gardener's shed," Brian said as he, Roger, and John sat out on the hotel bar's patio with their drinks. Luckily it was just the three of them out here right now, so they could discuss these things without fear of being overheard by someone. They all fell silent and sipped at their drinks. Though none of them wanted to say it aloud, it wasn't hard to imagine what that _something_ must have been.

"Hey. Excuse me."

Their attention was suddenly drawn to a man standing just outside the patio area, near the road.

"Yes?" Brian called to him.

"I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment," the man responded.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Brian asked.

"I'm an old classmate of Freddie's," the man said.

"Well, I'm sure Freddie would love to talk to you," Brian told him. "But he's currently indisposed of at the moment. Perhaps you could come back and try again tomorrow."

"Oh, I know he is," the man replied. "I was there in the garden at the school and I saw what happened. I just thought you might like to know why."

That gave Brian and the others pause.

"Besides it's not him I wanted to talk to anyway, it's you," the man continued.

"What did you say your name was again?" Brian asked.

"It's Michael," he said. "Freddie and I used to go to school together at St. Peter's."

"Just a moment," Brian said to him. He and the others hunkered down at the table for a brief discussion. "I'm not sure we should be trying to find out something that Freddie himself obviously hasn't wanted to tell us yet," Brian put in. "Especially from a stranger. I mean we don't know this man from Adam. He could be lying about being Freddie's classmate. He could be anybody." But then on the other hand...perhaps he really did know something, and maybe by knowing, they could find some way to help Freddie, or at least prevent the sort of thing that had happened this afternoon from happening again in the future. In the end it was decided the good outweighed the bad, and Brian walked over to the rail that separated the patio area from the road. "Well, Michael, you certainly have our attention," Brian told him. "Come around through the front, and we'll buy you a drink."

Michael seemed to be a nervous sort of bloke, fidgeting restlessly with the edge of his napkin until his vodka and tonic arrived. He took a sip as Brian, Roger, and John looked at him expectantly.

"Alright," he said at last. "It happened in the spring of 1961. Freddie was fourteen, and I had just turned thirteen, but was rather small for my age. I was the smallest of the boys in my class. A group of us at the school, Freddie and myself included, knew that we were gay from quite early on, but we were terrified to do anything about it. The consequences of being caught out those days were horrendous, so instead of actually doing anything, we would get our kicks from spying on the older boys while they were bathing, all except Freddie. He didn't think it was right, and tried to stop us. Unfortunately, I was nabbed by "The Master" - this seventeen-year-old head boy whose real name was Robert. But Freddie sacrificed himself for me. He told Robert to let me go and take him instead. I shouted to Freddie telling him to run, but he didn't stand a chance. Robert carted him off to the gardener's shed where he was knocked about a bit and forced to have sex with him. Freddie finally told me about it a couple of weeks later, but when I asked him why he hadn't reported the matter to the Principal, he made up an excuse saying that it was because he'd enjoyed the experience so much. Later, of course, he told me the truth was because he'd been petrified that if he told what had happened, he'd end up being sent down….."

A hushed silence fell over the table.

"After that his marks (grades) began to slip and when he failed the Class 10 examinations, his parents brought him back home to Zanzibar. I never saw him again after that, so you can imagine my surprise when I heard he was coming back here again. I couldn't quite believe it until I saw him with my own eyes. I didn't come up to speak to him because I was afraid his seeing me might bring up those old memories from the past, but I guess they found him anyway…"

It seemed there wasn't much left to say after that, and Michael politely excused himself saying he needed to get back home. He stood up from his chair. 

"I didn't come here to tell you all that to be morbid or to try and spread gossip and rumours," he said. "I just thought as his friends, you should know what happened. And maybe now you can find some way to help him."

They all thanked him, and then Brian showed him out.

"If there was some way to track that bloody bastard down, I'd-I'd…," Roger said when Brian returned to the table.

"I know, Rog. We all would," Brian said, placing a hand on Roger's clenched fist. "We all wish we could make it so that it never happened."

They all sat there, contemplating this new information they had just received.

"You know, I know we'll never be able to fix what happened, or make it go away," Brian said after a while. "But I think I might have an idea of something we can do to help Freddie, to keep him from leaving here with only bad memories of this place."

"Really?" Roger asked, turning towards him. "What did you have in mind?"


	9. Let Us Cling Together

That night Mary was putting the children to bed.

"Awww, we like it when Daddy puts us to bed," Little Freddie said.

"Daddy's resting," Mary told him, smoothing his hair affectionately. "And anyway, what am I to you? Chopped liver?"

"Yes," Little Freddie grinned mischievously.

"Freddie Mercury!" Mary gasped, pretending to be scandalized, while Little Freddie laughed.

Just then Freddie came into the room.

"Daddy!" the children exclaimed excitedly.

"Freddie!" Mary came and wrapped him in a hug. She kissed him on the cheek and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Are you alright? How are you feeling?"

"I'm...I'm…" Freddie didn't finish, but he and Mary truly were soul mates, and no words were needed.

"Are you sure you're feeling up to this?" Mary asked him. "I can put them to bed for one night…"

"No, I want to," Freddie told her.

"Of course, darling," Mary said, touching his cheek.

Freddie came over to the bed where the children were, and nestled himself between them on top of the covers with his legs stretched out and his back leaning against the headboard.

"Are you sick, Daddy?" Kashmira asked him.

"No, darling," Freddie told her. "Daddy just wasn't feeling well earlier. But Daddy's feeling a bit better now."

"Do you need some medicine?" she asked.

"Mm-mm. No, baby. Daddy's got all the medicine he needs right here," he said, cuddling Kashmira and Little Freddie close and giving them each a kiss.

"Tell us a story!" Little Freddie said.

"Hmm. I was thinking we'd try something a bit different tonight," Freddie told them. "Yes. I think you ought to tell me a bedtime story."

"What? Us tell you a bedtime story?" Little Freddie asked incredulously. He and Kashmira laughed.

"Yes," Freddie insisted. He readjusted making himself a bit more comfortable. "Right. I'm ready for my story now," he told them. "Go on then. Let's have it."

Little Freddie and Kashmira looked at each other and giggled.

"Alright...Once upon a time..." Little Freddie began.

"Once upon a time..." Freddie repeated.

"There was a little boy," Kashmira added.

"And what was this little boy's name?" Freddie asked.

"Er…," Little Freddie said.

"Well, surely he's got a name, hasn't he?" Freddie asked.

"His name was er...Alfred Mason," Little Freddie said at last.

"Right. And where did this little boy live?" Freddie asked.

"He lived in London," Little Freddie said.

"And he had a unicorn, panda, and a polar bear," Kashmira put in.

"My God! Well, I hope he had a zookeeper," Freddie said, making the children laugh.

"And they all had a rock n' roll band," Little Freddie continued. "Alfred played piano. The unicorn played the drums. The panda played the guitar. And the polar bear played bass. And that was the name of their band - Alfred & The Zookeepers!"

Freddie and the children all had a good laugh at that one. "Very talented, these chaps," Freddie said. "Go on."

"They were the best band in all the land," Little Freddie said.

"And one day The Queen invited them all to come and play for her at her palace," Kashmira said.

"Mm. I didn't realize Her Majesty was such a fan of rock n' roll," Freddie quipped.

"But-but they couldn't!" Little Freddie said. "Because er...because…a giant dragon swooped down out of the sky and was holding the palace hostage! And he said the only way he'd let them pass is-"

"If he could have a tea party with The Queen," Kashmira said.

"Fine," Little Freddie sighed. He'd been hoping for something a bit more swashbuckling than that. "Alfred said, 'You'll have to let us pass so we can go inside the palace and talk to The Queen.' But the dragon said, 'Only one of you may pass and the rest of you must stay here outside with me as a guarantee that you'll keep your word.' So the dragon allowed Alfred to pass while the others stayed there outside. Alfred went into the palace and The Queen said, 'Oh, Alfred! Save us from the dragon! Save us from the dragon, please!'" Little Freddie pleaded in a high pitched voice, hands clasped together, while Freddie and Kashmira laughed. "And Alfred said, 'I've already spoken to the dragon and he said the only way he'll leave you alone is if you'll agree to have tea with him.' And The Queen said-"

"'Yes.' So they all had a wonderful party together with lots of tea and cucumber sandwiches and sponge cake. Because he was a very nice dragon, after all," Kashmira said.

"Then Alfred & The Zookeepers performed a concert for The Queen right there in her palace. And at the end, The Queen said, 'That was the best music I ever heard in my whole life. Truly you are the best band in all the land. And you saved us all from the dragon. So now I shall knight you Sir Alfred.' And afterwards, she gave them all instruments of solid gold-"

"-covered in sparkly jewels," Kashmira added. "And they all lived happily ever after."

"The end," Little Freddie finished. Both children looked over at Freddie who pretended to be asleep, snoring.

"Wake up, Daddy! Wake up!" Kashmira giggled, shaking his shoulder.

"Oh! Oh!" Freddie "awoke" with a start. "That was such a good bedtime story, I fell right to sleep," he said. Then he took each of their faces in his hands in turn, and gave them a kiss. "Daddy loves you both so much. More than anything else in the whole wide world. You know that, don't you?"

Little Freddie and Kashmira nodded their heads, smiling, delighted in their father's affection. "Love you, too, Daddy!" they said.

"Alright, it's time for bed now," Freddie told them, giving them one last kiss. "Good night. Sweet dreams. Daddy'll see you in the morning."

Then he came over to Mary. "Good night, darling. Sweet dreams." He bent down to kiss her cheek.

Mary returned his kiss and then took his face in her hands. "Sweet dreams, Freddie. You know if you need anything at all, I'm right here."

*******

Freddie closed the door quietly behind him.

" _Beta_!"

He turned around to see his mother standing in the doorway of the room across the hall.

"Hey, Mama," he came over to give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

" _Beta_ , I've made you some tea and some of those little cheese biscuits I know you love," his mother said.

"What? How did you manage to do that? Have you got an oven in there?" he joked. "All we've got is a tea kettle, and we had to ask room service for that."

"I have my ways, _beta_ ," his mother answered him slyly. "Come inside."

Freddie came inside and his mother closed the door behind them.

"Where's Papa?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, he decided to go for a walk to get some fresh air," his mother said. "Now sit, sit!" she told him motioning to the bed. So Freddie sat down on the side of the bed, and his mother brought over a cup of tea and a plate of the little cheese biscuits, just as she'd said.

"There you are, _beta_ ," she said, handing them to him. 

"Thank you, Mama," Freddie said, taking them from her. He sat them carefully beside him on the bed.

" _Beta_ , what happened to you this afternoon?" his mother asked. "Mary said you weren't feeling well and needed to come back to the hotel to lie down. Are you sick? Have you got a fever?" she pressed her lips against his forehead, checking for fever, as many parents did, with a kiss. Even though Freddie was a grown up man, thirty-eight years old, he was still her baby. "Let me measure your temperature."

"Oh, no, Mama. Come on, now. I'm fine. It was just one of those things, you know," Freddie protested.

"Shhh! Hush now, _beta_! Don't tell your mother no," his mother told him. She went over to her and her husband's suitcases and began rummaging around. She returned shortly with a thermometer and a small tub of Vaseline. "Here we are. Now just turn around, _beta_. It won't take very long, and it won't hurt a bit."

"What?! Mama, no!" Freddie exclaimed, backing away horrified.

"Oh, _beta_! You're always so stubborn!" His mother went back over to the suitcases and returned again a few moments later, this time with a different thermometer.

"Under your tongue, then," she said, popping the thermometer into Freddie's mouth.

"I swear - you and Brian," Freddie mumbled around the thermometer.

"Ah! Ah! No talking!" his mother told him as she watched the wall clock. After enough time had passed she took out the thermometer and held it up to the light to read it.

"37°C (98.6°F)," she said.

"See, I told you I was alright," Freddie told her, already munching on the cheese biscuits. He was starving.

"Hmm. Very well, _beta_ ," his mother said. She put the thermometer back in the suitcase, then came and sat down beside him on the bed. "So what did you think?" she asked.

"What did I think of what?" Freddie said.

"Visiting the school," his mother said.

"Oh, well, I thought they gave us a very friendly reception. I couldn't believe they still had all of my old things. That was nice. And Brian and the others seemed to enjoy themselves...It brought back a lot of memories, I guess," Freddie said with a sad smile.

Suddenly his mother burst into tears. "Oh, _beta_!" she cried, throwing her arms around him. "I never wanted to send you away to that school! But there in Zanzibar at that time, the standard of education for boys was not so good. We wanted to send you somewhere where you could study properly, to give you a good start in life, a good future. We always thought perhaps you'd become a lawyer or an accountant. I cried when we left you, but you just mingled with the other boys. You seemed quite happy, and some of our friends' children went there as well. But I felt like a terrible mother, sending you away. Every day I prayed to God to forgive me, because I couldn't forgive myself. After every holiday when we had to leave you and you had to go back, it was like losing you all over again. And I said to myself, how long can my heart endure this? When we brought you back to Zanzibar I was so happy. It didn't matter that you had failed your exams, I was just glad to have you home. And I said never again. Never again will my boy be sent away from me. Oh, _beta_! I'm so sorry! Can you ever forgive me?"

Freddie put his arms around her, holding her tight as he rubbed her back. "Shhh. There, there. Please don't cry, Mama. You know I can't stand to see you cry, hmm? You're breaking my heart." He took her face in his hands. "Listen. Look at me. I've always said it's a wonderful school and I was very privileged to have been able to go there. I know what sacrifices you and Papa made so that I could attend. And if you hadn't sent me there, who knows? I might not have any of this. It taught me a lot. I learnt how to fend for myself, and how to be independent and not to rely on anybody else, and how to be responsible. It made me a stronger person. It's part of what made me who I am. I know it was very hard for you and Papa to send me away," Freddie told her. He hugged her close again. "But that was a long time ago. Nothing that happened was your fault. You were forced to make a difficult decision, and you only did what you thought was best, what you thought was right," he said, and he began to wonder who was he talking to? His mother or himself? "You've got to let it go, and forgive yourself." _Both of us._ And he gave her a kiss on the forehead.

*******

When he returned to his and Jim's hotel room, Freddie found Jim in bed, stretched out on top of the covers watching TV.

"You want some cheese biscuits? My mum made them," Freddie offered the little lunch-box his mum insisted on packing for him, just as she did every Thursday back in Feltham when Freddie came to visit.

Jim took the box. "How did she-"

"I've no idea," Freddie told him. "I asked her the same thing. You know what she said? She said, 'I have my ways.'"

Jim laughed out loud at that. "I love your mum. She's the best."

Freddie went to get ready for bed.

"Did you want to stay up for a little while?" Jim asked when he returned.

But Freddie was tired and said he was ready to turn in. So Jim shut off the lights and cautiously snuggled up to Freddie. This time Freddie let him, and soon drifted off to sleep. Once he was sure Freddie was sleeping peacefully, only then did Jim allow himself to fall asleep, his arm protectively around Freddie.

*******

The next morning, Freddie awoke to what sounded strangely like bells. _Goat herders_ , he thought. Sometimes they went right through the streets here. He noticed Jim was gone too. _Must have gone down to get some breakfast, and hopefully some tea._ Freddie closed his eyes to go back to sleep, but then he heard the bells again. They sounded as if they were coming from right outside. _What was that?_ Freddie got up and nearly went out onto the balcony in nothing but his boxer shorts, but then thought better of it. _That might be too hot for some people to handle_ , he laughed to himself as he put on his robe, tying the sash around his waist. When he opened the doors to the balcony and stepped out, the sight that met his eyes was the furthest thing from what he had been expecting. Everyone - Brian, Roger, John, and all the others (except his parents), and all the boys from St. Peter's were sitting on bikes, directly below his balcony. Even Kashmira was there on a little pink bicycle, and Phoebe who had arrived overnight. They must have rented out every bicycle in town. And they were all ringing their bells.

"Finally! Here comes his nibs," Jim said.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty," John called up, making them all laugh.

Freddie blinked his eyes in the morning sunlight, thinking this was some sort of strange dream. But it wasn't. He was clearly awake. All this was really happening.

"Well, it's about time you got your ar- er, butt out of bed!" Brian shouted.

"Brian what the-" Freddie started to say.

"Ah, ah! Little ears," Brian reminded him.

"What is this?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, we just thought you might be up for a, erm...BICYCLE RACE! is all...Got one waiting for you right here...," Brian told him, balancing an empty bicycle beside him.

"What?! A bicycle race?!" Freddie exclaimed. "But I haven't even got dressed yet."

"Well, hurry up and put some clothes on, then!" Roger shouted up to him. "Sounds to me like somebody's a bit chicken!"

"More like a BIG chicken," John said. Then he and Roger began clucking like chickens, and soon everybody else had joined in as well.

"Alright, I'll show you! I'll show you all of you!" Freddie told them. He dashed inside, splashed some water on his face, slapped on a little cologne, gave his hair a quick brush, then put on his jeans, a t-shirt, and of course his Adidas trainers and shades, and was downstairs and outside in less than five minutes.

Brian smiled as he handed the extra bike off to Freddie. Then they all moved out into the road, first making sure there were no pedestrians or vehicles or goat herders.

"Alright, on your marks. Get set…," Brian said. "GO! Last one to the lake is a rotten egg!" 

They all set off, with Freddie soon taking the lead, and Brian, Roger, and John following close behind. And Brian couldn't help but grin at the others when, as they were going down a hill, Freddie closed his eyes and let go of the handlebars, stretching his arms out as far as they would go, and letting the wind rush over him as if he were flying. Brian and Roger let out whoops of excitement, punching the air with a fist.

Freddie pulled up first in front of the lake's docks. He straddled his bike, breathing hard, completely exhilarated. 

Brian waited until the others had all arrived. "Now, we've got another little surprise for you, Freddie," he said, motioning to Freddie's left. Freddie turned to see a fleet of oarsmen and their wooden boats pulled up on the sand. "You alright with a little boat ride around the lake?" Freddie was struck speechless.

Reyansh stayed behind to guard the bikes, which were laid gently on their sides in the sand. Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John each got into separate boats with a group of boys from the school. And the wives and children got into another boat with Aarav to watch over them, all except Little Freddie who rode in his father's boat with the other boys from the school. And lastly, Jim, Phoebe, the other Roger, and Javed were all in another boat together. The oarsmen took them for a ride, rowing them all around the lake. 

"How's it going over there?" Brian called to Freddie, whose boat was adjacent to his.

"Oh, it's great!" Freddie answered, all smiles.

When they arrived back on shore, they thanked the oarsmen, and then rode their bikes into town where they returned them to the rental shop. Then Freddie kept the street vendors busy, buying bags of _jalebis_ (an Indian sweet) for everyone, including all the boys. And for Jim and Mary, he bought a Panchgani special - rose flavored ice cream in the shape of a red rose.

Then it was time for the boys to return home. They walked them back to the school, and the boys stood outside the gates, shouting and waving goodbye.

When they returned to the hotel, Brian, Roger, and John enticed Freddie out to the patio for a drink. 

"Did you have a good time today, Freddie?" Brian asked.

"Of course! It was absolutely wonderful, darlings! I think we showed the boys a real boogie time." Freddie took a sip of his drink. "Anyway, thank you. I don't know how I'd ever get along without the three of you to keep me on my toes, I tell ya."

"You wouldn't," Roger joked, and they all chuckled.

"Well, we just wanted you to have something nice to look back on when you think of this place," Brian told him. "And even more than that, Freddie, we just want you to know that we're here for you always. Even if you just need somebody to listen."

"I-I don't think I'm ready to talk about anything just yet," Freddie said. "But it's nice to know that when I am, you're all here for me."

"Of course, Freddie!" Brian told him. "We care about you, and we're here to help you in any way that we can. No matter what happens, or has happened, I promise we'll get through it together. As long as we have each other, we can make it through anything. Because you are loved, Freddie. More than you'll ever know. And not just by your billions of adoring, screaming fans like you might think sometimes. But me, Roger, John, Mary, Jim, Phoebe, Kash, your parents, Little Freddie, Kashmira - we all love you, and nothing, nothing can or will ever change that. Ever."

*******

It was their last day in Panchgani. Tomorrow they would begin making their way to the last stop on their holiday - Gujarat, where Freddie's parents were from. But Freddie apparently had one last trick up his sleeve for Jim before they left.

"You go and have an hour’s lie-down," Freddie said to Jim, when he returned from having his drink with Brian and the others. "I'm just going to pop down to the shops for a bit. I'll be back soon, don't worry." 

Jim, who was completely knackered after their fun filled afternoon, didn't object, but laid right down immediately and was soon fast asleep, snoring away. He didn't even stir when Freddie returned a short while later, hiding something away surreptitiously in the room's wardrobe.

Later that night he and Freddie sat stretched out on the bed, watching TV together. Suddenly Freddie turned to him.

"You wanna shag?" he asked completely casually.

"Well, uh...yeah I guess," Jim said, a bit thrown off. These things weren't usually proposed as such - they just sort of _happened_. "If you're sure you're feeling up to it, that is." Then he watched, totally confused, as Freddie got up and went over to the wardrobe.

"Well, here you are then," Freddie said, pulling out a beautiful Indian shag rug he must have bought when he'd gone down to the shops this afternoon.

Jim burst out laughing.

"Is that not the kind of shag you thought I meant, dear?" Freddie asked, barely able to contain his laughter. "Come over here and show me then, darling."

"Oh, I'll show you," Jim grinned, getting up from the bed…

Afterwards, they lay beside each other on the newly christened rug, completely spent, and breathing heavily.

"Oh," Freddie said, still trying to catch his breath. "So that's what you thought I meant."

They both laughed then, and that's when Jim knew - Freddie was back.

***BONUS* Here are some pictures of a young Freddie during his time in Panchgani.**

****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *WARNING* there's going to be the parental spanking of a child (not abusive) in the next chapter poor Kash :'( so if that's not your thing or if it's going to bother you, then you may not want to read ahead. But there will also be some fluff afterwards to make up for it.


	10. La Vita è Bella (Life Is Beautiful)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Travel to Gujarat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *WARNING* there's going to be the parental spanking of a child (not abusive) in this chapter poor Kash :'( so if that's not your thing or if it's going to bother you, then you may not want to read ahead. But there will also be some fluff afterwards to make up for it.

The next day was another travel day. They were to take the bus back to Pune, and then the train again back to Bombay, where they would spend the night before making their way to Gujarat the next day. But upon arrival in Pune, before heading to the train station, Freddie insisted to Brian and the other boys that they needed to go shopping.

"What for?" Roger asked.

"A little gift for our friend," Freddie winked mischievously.

Later, when they were on the train, Freddie's mother came into his compartment and sat down beside him.

" _Beta_ …," she began.

"Yes, Mama, what is it?" Freddie asked.

His mother wrung her hands nervously before answering. "Well, since we're staying another night in Bombay, I was just wondering - only if there's time of course...if we could visit my sister - your Auntie Sheroo."

"Of course!" Freddie said. "And if there's not time, we'll make time. This holiday is for you and Papa before anybody else," he told her. "And we're going to do exactly as you please."

Then it seemed there was something more she was hesitating to ask.

"Come on. Out with it," Freddie told her.

"If Sheroo wanted to accompany us to Gujarat, would that be alright? Your father and I would pay for it of course. It might be the last chance she gets to go back there as well. You know she's not in very good health," his mother said.

"It's like I said before, Mama," Freddie said. "It's whatever you and Papa want. And if you want her to come, and she wants to come, then by all means she should come. I'll inform Phoebe and Javed to make the arrangements."

His mother's face broke out into an enormous smile. "Oh, thank you, _beta_." She kissed him on the cheek. "You don't know how much this means to me."

When they arrived at the train station in Bombay, Freddie was glad to spot their "friend" working the ticket counter again. The man spotted them as well, and hurriedly tried to hide behind his magazine, but it wasn't working. They were headed straight for him. So he tried enticing passersby to his line instead.

"Ma'am! Ma'am! I know you need to buy a ticket!" he hissed at a lady from around his magazine. But the woman just gave him a strange look, and began walking even faster. He tried again - this time with a man. "Sir! Sir!" But all too soon he found Freddie Mercury leaning on his elbow on the counter, a huge grin plastered on his face.

"Hello again, darling! It's us!"

"O-oh. H-hello," the man gulped nervously. "H-how can I-"

"Did you get your machine looked at, then?" Freddie asked.

"Y-yes, sir," the man said. "I-it was just a little problem with the machine, b-but-"

"Of course it was, darling!" Freddie gave him a wink. "I knew it must be that. And just to show there are no hard feelings between us, we have a little gift for you." He placed a small gift box on the counter.

"T-thank you, sir," the man said. "B-but I'm not allowed to accept gifts-"

"Oh, well, that's too bad, darling," Freddie said, taking the box back. "In that case, I'm afraid we _will_ have to file a formal complaint about what happened the other night."

The man quickly reached over and snatched the box from Freddie's hands. He opened it slowly to reveal the most beautiful golden pocket watch.

"Open it," Freddie told him with a smile.

So the man did, and inside was inscribed the message - _Your friends from Kalyan - F.M., B.M., R.T., & J.D. _

"A proper pocket watch that is, too," Roger said. "Something a man could pass down to his sons."

"And grandsons," Brian added.

The man seemed at a loss for words, opening and closing his mouth several times before finally speaking. "Why?" he asked, looking up at them.

"Anyone who works in a train station ought to have a decent pocket watch," Freddie told him. "To keep track of the comings and goings of the trains and all that."

"But-"

"Listen, darling," Freddie said. "We wouldn't have had nearly as good a time if we hadn't gotten lost in Kalyan. That was half the fun! So, it's our little way of saying thanks for the memories and for arranging that little adventure for us - one that I'm sure none of us will ever forget."

"T-thank you! Thank you so much!" the man said, and there were tears in the corners of his eyes.

They all smiled at him.

"What did you say your name was again, darling?" Freddie asked.

"Sambhunath," the man answered.

"Sammy, then," John said.

"Take care, Sammy," Freddie said, giving him another wink. "Until next time." Then he and the others turned and walked away.

"S-safe journey," the man called out at the last moment, but Freddie and the others were already out of earshot.

It was a few weeks later, as he was walking home from the station, that he recognized some familiar faces in a record shop window. He gasped, and went right inside and bought their record. When he arrived home, he put the record on and soon discovered he was a Queen fan. He loved all their songs, but the one that seemed to speak to him the most was _Spread Your Wings._

"Sammy was low just watching the _trains_ over and over again…," he sang to himself. And when the chorus came he belted out, "So, honey, spread your wings and fly away! Fly away, far away! Spread your little wings and fly away! Fly away, far away!"

The very next day, emboldened by this message that seemed to somehow be destined just for him from his new found friends, he decided he was tired of settling for last place. He traded in his magazines for a study guide to the RRB exams - the first step in achieving his lifelong wish of becoming a fully-fledged train conductor.

And he always kept the pocket watch. Even years later, once he'd finally become Captain Sambhunath Shan, it was the only watch he ever used, and he often thought back fondly on the friends that had given it to him, whose music had inspired him to pursue his dreams.

*******

They spent the night in Bombay, and the next morning went to visit Freddie's Aunt Sheroo Khory at her home in the Dadar Parsee colony - the largest Parsi and Zoroastrian enclave in the world.

 _Was that like a leper or penal colony?_ Roger wondered to himself, but was glad he didn't voice his question aloud.

It was absolutely gorgeous and very posh (upper class) - with beautiful houses with large open spaces between them, parks, gardens (including the famous Five Gardens created by Mancherji Joshi, a renowned Parsi), and well laid out streets.

"Oh, Freddie!" Sheroo cried when they arrived on her doorstep. "I knew you wouldn't forget about your Auntie Sheroo!" She threw her arms around him. Freddie returned her embrace and bent down to kiss her on the cheek.

"We brought the whole crew," Freddie told her. "I hope you don't mind."

"Well, I've never had this many visitors in my house before," Sheroo said, taking in all the others standing behind Freddie. "But the more the merrier I always say. Come in. Come in."

Once they were all inside, Freddie introduced her to everyone. Jim was introduced as the gardener once more. There was a look of sadness in Freddie's eyes that said to Jim, _I'm so sorry, darling. But I promise I'll make it up to you later._ Jim understood. He knew Freddie's Aunt Sheroo was highly religious. But still it hurt a little.

Sheroo was especially delighted with the children. She had fallen into regular correspondence with Mary, trading photographs of Freddie in boyhood and Freddie the famous rock star, and so had seen pictures of the children, but this, of course, was the first time she was seeing them in person.

Then Sheroo had a treat for them all. "Even when Freddie would stay with Jer, his other aunt, he would always come to me after breakfast, and would spend entire days with me. He was very good at drawing, and I encouraged him," she recounted to them. Then she shuffled into the kitchen and returned shortly with a hand-drawn picture - two horses in a storm, signed “Farrokh" at the bottom. "He drew this when he was only eight years old," she told them, passing the picture around for all to see.

Next, she showed them over to her piano - the same piano Freddie had first played when he was just a little boy. She explained to them that it had been she who had first discovered Freddie's musical talents. Once, while Freddie's parents were visiting, his mother began playing the piano and he copied it right away. "He was so small that he had to turn the stool up on its end to reach the keys," she said. "Then he began the tune that his mother had just played. I asked him who taught him and he replied that he'd heard mummy playing it. Then another time he was listening to the radio. It was Indian music and when it was over he played the same tune. Still, we didn't believe he could do it right off like that. We thought someone must be teaching him. But he did once more and I realised he had real talent. That's when I encouraged his parents to arrange for him to have special music lessons at school. He must have been about nine or ten."

Little Freddie softly ran his fingers over the dusty keys.

"Can he play?" Sheroo turned to Freddie and asked.

"Yes, he can," Freddie told her with a nod. "He plays very well."

"May I?" Little Freddie asked.

"Of course you may!" Sheroo said.

Little Freddie sat down, then he turned to look at the others. "What shall I play?" he asked.

"You may play whatever you like," Sheroo told him.

Little Freddie turned back around, placing his fingers on the keys. He thought about it for a moment. "This is a song Montserrat Caballé sings. She's an opera singer from Spain, and she's Daddy's favorite," he explained. "It's the [_Barcarolle - Belle nuit, ô nuit d'amour_](https://youtu.be/ymaRQO3jys0). It's a piece from the opera _The Tales of Hoffmann_ composed by Jacques Offenbach. But unfortunately I don't know the words because they're all in French." Then he began to play, the beauty of the song leaving them all breathless. Unbeknownst to all of them, it was a song little Kashmira would one day sing at the Gran Teatre del Liceu in Barcelona, Spain, earning her a twenty-five minute standing ovation, having taken up opera after retiring at the age of thirty-five from dancing as a ballerina with the Royal Ballet. They all clapped for him when he'd finished. He turned around again to face them.

"Would you like to play another?" Sheroo asked. "I'd love to hear you sing."

"Alright," Little Freddie agreed. "We sing this one in the choir at school all the time. It was really hard for us at first because it's in Latin, but we've learnt all the words now." And he launched into a beautiful rendition of [ _Ave Maria_](https://youtu.be/CS-odKIr-Ho), showcasing the amazing voice he'd inherited from his father. Everyone stood mesmerized. It was as if they were hearing the voice of an angel. For Sheroo it was like seeing her beloved nephew as a child all over again. And Freddie himself couldn't help but stand there, arms crossed over his chest, grinning like mad. He really was the proudest papa in the whole world at the moment. But Little Freddie didn't seem to notice any of it. At the conclusion of the song, he transitioned perfectly into a new piece that none of them could ever remember having heard before, though it had undertones similar to some of his father's music. He closed his eyes in concentration, continuing the song a little while longer, before coming to an end. Everyone clapped for him again, and he gave them all an appreciative smile.

"What was that bit there at the end?" Sheroo asked.

"Oh, that," Little Freddie said. "It's just a little song I've been working on." He shrugged self-consciously, looking down as he traced the grain of the piano seat with a finger. "I haven't got the lyrics worked out quite yet, you see."

"I'm sure you'll have them straightened out in no time," Sheroo told him.

Little Freddie looked up, giving her a shy smile.

"How's your eye?" Freddie asked his aunt later, taking her face in his hands to examine her. At one point he had wanted to take her on a tour of Europe, but she'd declined, stating her poor health, and failing eyesight, and he'd sent her money for a badly needed eye operation.

"It's much better now. Thank you," she said.

"Well, that's good," Freddie told her. "You're going to be doing a lot of sight-seeing."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

Jer came over to her and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Sheroo, we've already talked to Freddie, and Bomi and I want you to come with us to Gujarat."

Sheroo gasped, one hand held over her mouth, and another over her heart. She looked between the two of them, hardly daring to believe it. Then she burst into tears, wrapping her arms around him. 

"Oh, Freddie! Freddie! Thank you! Thank you so much! It's like a dream come true! I never thought I'd ever see Gujarat again in my lifetime." She pulled back slightly and reached up to kiss his cheek. Freddie smiled down at her. He took her face in his hands, wiping away her tears with his thumbs.

"But- I haven't even got any of my things together yet. I-"

"Don't worry. I'll help," Jer told her.

"So will I," Mary offered.

"Us too," the other wives said.

With everyone helping, they soon had Sheroo's things packed in record time. Javed carried her bags, and Phoebe gave her his arm and assisted her out to the waiting vehicles. Sheroo had to hug and kiss Freddie one more time before getting into the car with his parents. Then they were on their way.

*******

It was another long car ride - three and a half hours, and the two long days of travel were beginning to take their toll, especially on Kashmira, who, in her defence, had only just turned five-years-old. She was cranky and restless, and had been misbehaving all day and just being generally naughty. Freddie said her name warningly and gave her a stern look to behave. She settled down slightly and behaved a bit better after that. But later she began acting up again, and it became quite clear that it was going to take more than just a stern look and a stern word from Freddie to get her to behave. However, Freddie and Mary both tried to be very patient and understanding with her, thinking things would calm down once they _finally_ reached the hotel, and everyone got settled into their rooms and had something to eat in their bellies. But it was after they'd checked into the hotel, just as Mary had finished tidying away their things in their room, and room service had brought them their dinner of _patra ni machhi_ , that Kashmira's misbehaviour crossed the line.

"Kashmira, darling," Mary called to her. "Put your dollies and playthings away, please, and go wash your hands for dinner." Then she turned to Little Freddie. "Freddie, darling, you too," she said.

"Yes, Mummy," Little Freddie said. He put his action figures away, and went into the bathroom to wash his hands. Kashmira, however, continued on playing.

"Kashmira, I know you heard me, young lady," Mary said firmly when Kashmira didn't obey. "Put your dollies and playthings away, and go wash your hands for dinner."

But Kashmira had no intention of doing as she was told. "No, Mummy, I'm playing!" she shouted, stamping her foot.

Mary gasped. "Young lady!"

That's when Kashmira heard her father call her name.

"Kashmira, come here right now," Freddie told her sternly, beckoning her with his finger. She'd quite forgotten that her father was still here. She thought he'd gone back to his and Papa Jim's room.

"Oooh!" Little Freddie gasped.

"Freddie," his mother said his name gently, shaking her head.

Kashmira started crying then, covering her eyes with her hands. She came over slowly to where her father was sat at the end of one of the beds. She knew she was in big trouble. She knew she wasn't allowed to raise her voice to her parents, or any adult for that matter, or tell them _NO!_ , and certainly not stamp her feet. _But Mummy was being really unfair!_ However, she didn't think Daddy would see if that way...

"Did you just shout _NO!_ at Mummy and stamp your foot at her?" Freddie asked.

Kashmira didn't answer, just stood there crying the way she was.

"Look at me, Kashmira," Freddie told her, gently taking her hands away from her eyes. "Are you supposed to talk to Mummy like that?"

"Mm-mm." Kashmira shook her head in reply, wiping at her eyes with the heel of her hand.

"No," Freddie agreed. "You don't ever talk to Mummy like that. You don't ever raise your voice to her, or tell her _NO!_ , or stamp your feet at her. You're to mind what she says, and say, 'Yes, Mummy', and do as she tells you immediately, without any whining, or crying, or talking back," he said. Then he had been going to spank her, but decided to give her one last chance, and instead let her off with a warning. "If you ever talk to Mummy like that again, I'm going to spank you," he told her. "Do you understand me?"

Kashmira nodded her head.

"Answer me, Kashmira," Freddie told her.

"Yes, Daddy," Kashmira answered him.

"In fact, Mummy ought to spank you right now for talking to her like that, and I wouldn't blame her one bit if she did," Freddie said. "And another thing - from now on, if Mummy has to tell you more than once to stop playing with your toys and put them away, they're all going to be taken away for a whole week's time. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Daddy," Kashmira said.

"Go stand in the corner," Freddie told her. "And think about how you're going to behave from now on." 

So Kashmira did as she was told, and went over to the corner and stood there crying. But it was far better than getting a spanking. Freddie left her there to reflect on her behaviour for five minutes, and then called her back to him again.

"Come here, Kashmira," he said. 

She came and stood in front of him, still crying.

"Right. Are you going to behave yourself now, and do as you're told, or do I need to give you a spanking?" Freddie asked her.

"I'm going to behave," Kashmira answered between hitching sobs.

"Are you going to talk to Mummy like that ever again?"

"No, Daddy," Kashmira said.

"And from now on, are you going to mind what she says, and do as she tells you, and stop playing with your toys and put them away when she asks you to?"

"Yes, Daddy."

"Come here." Freddie took her on his knee and cuddled her close. "I hope you're telling the truth, Kashmira," he said to her gently. "I haven't had to spank you for a long while." And it was true. Freddie hadn't had to spank her for nearly seven months. "And I'd hate to have to do it, especially now. Mummy and I are both really proud of the way you and Freddie have been so well-behaved the entire holiday. It'd be sad if I had to spank somebody right here at the end." He gave her a kiss. "Don't ever do that again."

Kashmira nodded her head.

"Right. Go and tell Mummy you're sorry, then put your toys away, and go wash your hands for dinner like she told you." Freddie set her down off his knee. Kashmira went over to her mother.

"I'm sorry, Mummy," she said tearfully, looking up at her.

"It's alright, darling," Mary knelt down and gathered her into a hug. Then she looked Kashmira in the eyes, and took her hands in her own. "But you can't talk to Mummy like that and be naughty and disobedient, alright?"

Kashmira nodded her head.

"Promise Mummy you'll never do that again."

"I promise," Kashmira said.

"If it happens again, even though Daddy and I both love you very much, and we don't want to do it, I'm afraid you'll have to be punished," Mary told her. "Do you understand?"

"Yes, Mummy," Kashmira answered.

"Alright, sweetheart." Mary gave her a kiss and smoothed her hair, placing a lock behind her ear. Then she straightened up. "Now then, please go and put your dollies and playthings away, and then go and wash your hands for dinner."

"Yes, Mummy," Kashmira said, and went and did as she was bid. After she'd finished putting her dollies and other playthings neatly away, she went into the bathroom to wash her hands. When she came out, she looked over at Freddie who gave her a wink and a smile.

"Good girl," he said.

Kashmira took her seat at the table, and everything was going along just swimmingly, until…Mary set a plate of the _patra ni machhi_ in front of her. To say that Kashmira was not at all impressed with the fish, stuffed heavily with green coconut chutney and wrapped in a banana leaf and then steam cooked, was quite an understatement.

"I don't like this," she said.

"How do you know you don't like it?" Mary asked. "You haven't even taken one bite yet."

Kashmira just made a sort of whining noise in reply.

"You should try it, Kash. It's really good. Honestly." Little Freddie took a large bite, trying his best to encourage her. "Mmm. See? It's delicious."

"No! I don't want to eat that!" Kashmira said.

"Well, that's too bad," Mary said. "I suppose you'll just have to go to bed hungry, then. That's what we're eating."

"I want a biscuit (cookie)," Kashmira said.

"You may have a biscuit after you've finished all your dinner," Mary told her. "Now eat your food."

But Kashmira shoved her plate away, and pushed her chair back from the table.

"You're mean!" she shouted, arms crossed over her chest, and beginning to cry.

And that was the last straw. Without a word, Freddie came over and took her calmly by the hand, and began leading her towards the in-suite bathroom. Kashmira instantly realized her mistake.

"No, Daddy, no! I will eat it! I will! I will!" She cried. But it was too late. "Daddy, no! Daddy! I will! I will! I will eat it!"

Freddie took her into the bathroom, and shut the door behind them. The walls were quite thin, however, and afforded very little privacy. Mary and Little Freddie, from their places at the table, could, uncomfortably, hear everything that was going on in there. They heard Kashmira still pleading and crying, followed by five hard, sharp smacks, and then Kashmira crying even harder.

Freddie, sitting on the side of the bath, took Kashmira on his knee and held her close as she sobbed against him. "I always love you, but I expect you to behave," he told her gently. "You're a good little girl, and I know you can do better." Then he gave her a kiss. It broke his heart that he had to spank her on holiday. But consequences were consequences and poor choices were poor choices. And disrespect and direct, willful disobedience weren't something that Freddie and Mary, as parents, could just ignore and “let go", as it were. Especially after she'd been warned and given another chance to behave, and then chose to disobey again anyway. Still, he couldn't be too upset with her. He knew she got the diva attitude from him; it was just that sometimes she let it run riot, and that's what oftentimes got her into trouble. He held her close on his knee and rubbed her back until she calmed down and had nearly stopped crying. Then he reached over and took some toilet tissue. "Look at me," he said. He wiped away her tears, and then held the tissue to her nose. "Blow," he instructed. Kashmira did it. Freddie wiped her nose and threw the tissue into the bin. He gave her another kiss. "Come on," he said.

Freddie and Kashmira emerged from the bathroom and she was brought over to her mother.

"What do you say, Kashmira?" Freddie prompted.

"Sorryyy, Mummyyy," Kashmira said, starting to cry all over again.

Mary took her in her lap. "Shhh. There, there, darling," she said. "I'm sorry you had to be punished, and I know Daddy really hated to have to do that. But it's like we talked about before, sweetheart. You cannot talk to Mummy like that, and be naughty and disobedient that way. You have to do what Mummy and Daddy tell you. Alright? Do you understand?"

Kashmira nodded her head against her mother's chest in reply.

"Alright, darling." Mary gave her a kiss. She held her close, rubbing her back until she stopped crying.

Afterwards, Kashmira was made to sit back down at the table and finish her dinner, this time without a biscuit at the end, although Little Freddie was offered one. He looked over at his sister, who sat with tears in her eyes, and then turned back to his mother.

"Mmm, no, thank you. Maybe later," he said.

Then it was time for a bath (no bubbles allowed tonight either), and to clean her teeth, and then into her pajamas and straight to bed. And it was a very sad and sorry little girl Freddie put to bed early that night.

"Good night. Daddy loves you." He gave her a kiss. "Close your eyes now and go to sleep." He pulled the covers up over her. "Sweet dreams. Daddy'll see you in the morning." Then he went over to the table and sat down with Mary.

Kashmira couldn't help but cry a little, feeling more than a bit sorry for herself.

Freddie turned to look at her. "Kashmira," he said her name warningly, giving her a stern look. "Close your eyes right now, and go to sleep."

Kashmira did as she was told and closed her eyes, and despite everything, was soon fast asleep. Later she was awoken to the feel of her brother gently shaking her shoulder.

"Kash! Kash! Wake up, Kash!" he called to her in a whisper. The room was dark now except for the light coming from the bathroom through the slightly cracked open doorway. She sat up slowly. 

"Shhh." Little Freddie put a finger to his lips and then handed her a biscuit, the one he had declined from earlier. "Hurry! You have to eat it fast before Mummy comes," he told her. Little did he know his mother was already watching from the crack in the bathroom doorway, but it was such a sweet scene she couldn't even begin to be angry or upset. Kashmira complied at once, stuffing her mouth with bits of biscuit, smearing her mouth and fingers with chocolate in the process. "Listen, Kash," he said. "I know it's really hard sometimes, but you have to try and be good, and do what Mummy and Daddy say. You're my little sister, and I don't like it when you get in trouble and get spanked. It makes me sad when you cry. And surely you don't want me to be sad, do you?" Kashmira shook her head. "Alright then. You have to be good." He held out a crooked pinky finger towards her. "Swear it, Kash," he said.

"I swear," Kashmira said, mouth full of biscuit. She wrapped her own pinky finger around his. Little Freddie leant down and kissed their entwined fingers to seal the promise. Then he got up and crept into the kitchen and soon returned with a paper napkin. He wiped her fingers and mouth, making sure there were no traces of chocolate left, and then tossed the napkin in the bin. "Lie down," he instructed. Kashmira did as she was told, and he pulled the covers up over her. "Now, go back to sleep." He gave her a kiss on the brow, and then returned to his own bed for the night.


	11. My Sweet Lord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little Freddie teaches his family & friends a lesson in religious tolerance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize this chapter's probably going to be a bit controversial, but as Freddie once said (about people hating on his moustache): "A lot of people hate it but I don't give a fuck, I tell ya. I don't give two shits!" I write what I want.
> 
> *RELIGIOUS DISCUSSION AHEAD* You've been warned. Read at your own discretion.

The next day Freddie came to say good morning with lots of kisses and tickles, which soon devolved into an all-out roughhousing/wrestling match. In the end Kashmira ended up sitting on top of Freddie's chest, pinning his hands down on either side of his head. Freddie struggled to free himself, but pretended he couldn't, while Kashmira giggled. Little Freddie came over and counted him out, slapping the mat (or in this case the mattress) beside his father, like they did in wrestling.

"One! Two! Three! Ding Ding! Kash wins! Yay!" He held up Kash's arm in victory.

"And that's quite enough of that." They all turned to see Mary who stood there with her arms crossed. She never did approve very much of their horseplay, afraid somebody might get hurt. But all the same, a tiny grin played across her lips. "Come and have your breakfast."

"Awww!" Little Freddie said, but he slouched over obediently to the table. Kashmira began to get down too, but Freddie held onto her for one moment longer.

"Come here, darling," he said, pulling her close. "Are you still Daddy's best girl?" he asked her seriously.

"No," Kashmira giggled teasingly.

"No?! No?!" Freddie reached up and tickled her until she squealed with laughter.

"Yes! I am! I am your best girl!" she gasped.

Freddie smiled at her affectionately. "Give Daddy a kiss," he said. So Kashmira bent down and gave him a big kiss and they both smiled. "Daddy loves you very, very much, sweetheart," he told her, stroking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Right. Off you go," Freddie said, helping her down as he sat up.

After that Kashmira was back to her normal sweet angel and daddy's girl self.

*******

After breakfast everyone met outside in front of the hotel. Freddie's mother had taken to her instructor role like a duck to water, excited to teach her grandchildren about their Parsi culture and heritage.

"The city we're staying in now is called Valsad," she began. "In Gujarati that means 'covered in banyan trees' because so many grow here. But during the time of the British Raj it was known as Bulsar. That's how Freddie's father and his uncles got their last name Bulsara, because this is where they were born and brought up."

"Wow! That is so interesting," Brian smiled.

Roger gently elbowed Freddie and leant towards him.

"I guess we know who the teacher's pet is!" he said, making Freddie and John snicker. "All the same I kind of feel like I should be taking notes or something. I'm scared your mum might spring a pop quiz about all of this on us later."

Cars soon arrived to pick them up, their destination - Udvada, a town about thirty minutes away. Everyone began getting into the vehicles, except for Freddie's father, who stood smiling broadly, hands clasped behind his back.

"Aren't you coming, Papa?" Freddie asked him.

"No, no. I've got some errands to do around here," he said. "You all go and have fun. Just be sure you're back by dinner time."

 _That sounded rather curious_ , Freddie thought. _But whatever._

On the way, Jer told them all about Udvada and how important it was to the Parsi people.

"The name Udvada means 'grazing ground of camels', but of course now it's a fishing town. It's a very important pilgrimage site for us Parsis, because of the _Atash Behram_ \- victorious fire. It is the most sacred of all the Zoroastrian fire temples in India and the oldest continuously burning fire-temple fire in the world. Its fire has been burning for over 1,270 years," she told them. "And in fact, Freddie's grandfather, my father, was a very highly respected priest there before he passed away."

She then went on to explain how during the Muslim conquest of Greater Iran during the 7th century, a group of Parsis fled from Greater Khorasan in the year 715 in order to preserve their religious customs and beliefs. They traveled by ship from Hormuz in the Persian Gulf to the west coast of India, carrying their sacred fire with them. Upon landing at Diu, the refugees moved along the coast and founded the settlement of Sanjan, which lies about 30 km south of Udvada, in the modern day state of Gujarat. Here she paused to recount to them one of the oldest stories in Parsi folklore: _Like Sugar In Milk_.

"When the Parsis first founded Sanjan, the ruler of the land was King Jadhav Rana, a good man," she began. "But the land was already full of people and couldn't accept any more refugees. Now the language of the Indian and Parsis was different, so to welcome the strangers and communicate this message, the king sent them a glass of milk filled to the brim. The Zoroastrian priests being wise, immediately understood the message, and since they were peace loving religious people, they wanted to send back a message. They added a spoonful of sugar to the glass of milk, to indicate that they would not bring the glass to overflowing and indeed make the land, community, and lives of the citizens richer, sweeter, and more prosperous by their good values, knowledge, and hard work. King Jadhav Rana was so impressed with this gesture, that he granted them asylum, and permitted them to practice their religion and traditions freely. He welcomed them with gifts, and helped them settle in the new land of India. The Parsis thus settled and assimilated, blended in India like the sugar in the milk."

Over the course of the next several centuries however, the kindness and generosity of King Jadhav Rana was forgotten, and the Parsis were faced with continuous adversity and persecution, forcing them to flee from Sanjan, first to the nearby caved in the Barhot hills, then Bansda, Navsari, Surat, Valsad, and finally Udvada, where the present fire temple was consecrated in 1742.

As it so happened, they did get to see the fire temple, but they couldn't go inside. Non-Parsis weren't allowed on the premises. But it was all okay because Freddie had made sure there would be plenty of time later in the week for his parents and aunt to visit the fire temple before the end of the holiday and their return to England. In the meantime, the others were permitted to take pictures from the gates.

Then they continued on to the main attraction of the day - the Zoroastrian Heritage Museum & Information Centre. The building was located across from the beach, and surrounded by a pleasant garden, giving it a calm, peaceful atmosphere. Once inside, Jer walked them through the various displays, exhibits, and information panels telling about the advent, culture, rich heritage, and turbulent history of the Parsi people, as well as the roots and journey footprints of their community and their adaption and contribution to Indian society. There was also information about the founder of their religion, Zoroaster, and his teaching and beliefs about _Ahura Mazda_ (Wise Lord). The museum also contained sculptures, photographic illustrations, and portraits - including pictures of the Zoroastrian dynasties. But the best part of all were the original Zoroastrian artifacts on daily life, customs, practices, and the rituals of death, marriage, and the _navjote_ \- the holy fire ceremony Freddie and all young Parsi boys went through as their indoctrination into the Zoroastrian faith. There was even a replica of the inside of a fire temple, complete with a model showing a Parsi priest tending to a holy flame; dressed in white, he wore a white cloth face-covering rather like a loose-fitting surgeon's mask. Phoebe and Mary had both been afraid Freddie would be bored stiff, but surprisingly he seemed to find it all very interesting.

Afterwards they had lunch at the museum's cafeteria, where they got to try some real, authentic Parsi cuisine. Then it was time for the cars to take them back to their hotel in Valsad, where the rest of the afternoon was spent lounging around the pool while the children played in the water. Freddie glanced over at his father who, never much one for words, was now talking animatedly with his mother. He seemed excited and happy. Almost too happy, as he hadn't been the entire trip up until now. And Freddie noticed he kept anxiously consulting the time on his watch, as if he were waiting for something. But at four o'clock on the dot, it seemed the time had finally arrived for whatever it was. Freddie watched as his father got out of his pool chair and came to stand in front of everyone.

"Could I have everybody's attention just for a moment, please," he called out in his big, booming voice. They all turned to look at him. "I've arranged with the hotel staff for us to all have dinner together in an hour on the beach," he announced, to everyone's delight.

"Well that's very nice, Papa," Freddie said. "What's the occasion?"

"Family, friends, and food," Bomi answered. "I never expected to see my hometown again, but now here I am, with my wife and children and grandchildren. What could be better? That's cause for celebration." And Freddie supposed he couldn't argue with that.

So in an hour at five o'clock, they all met together down in the lobby, and the staff led them out to the hotel's private, secluded area of the beach, where tables had been pushed together and wooden chairs set up, enough to accommodate all of them. The decorations were simple yet elegant - the brilliant white of the billowing table cloths, dotted with plates of fine china and glasses of Chardonnay, contrasting beautifully with the amazing black sands of Tithal Beach. It looked like something out of a magazine. Not to mention the food was delicious once they'd all been seated and served. It was the perfect ending to a wonderful day with smiles and lots of laughter all around. It was during dessert (which in keeping with the theme, was chocolate cake dyed black, with vanilla frosting and vanilla ice cream on the side), that Bomi pulled a white, rectangular box from beneath his seat.

"And now I have a surprise - a very special gift for my eldest grandson," he said. "Freddie, my boy, come here."

Little Freddie got up and came over to his grandfather. He cast a glance at Freddie who gave him a reassuring wink. Bomi put an arm around his waist and handed him the box.

"Thank you, Dādā," Little Freddie said, taking the box from him. "What is it?"

"Well, open it up and see," Bomi told him. Little Freddie opened the box to reveal a white tunic and belt - the _sedreh_ and _kushti_ \- the sacred garments used in the _navjote_ fire ceremony. "These have been passed down in our family for generations," Bomi said. "They're the same ones I wore, and your papa wore for his _navjote_ when he was little. And now they'll be the same ones that you'll wear for yours. All the arrangements have already been made."

"What arrangements?" Freddie asked his father.

"Well for Freddie's _navjote_ , of course," Bomi answered him. "I've arranged for Freddie to have his _navjote_ in three days at the _Atash Behram_ in Udvada, the one you all saw today. Can you believe it? My grandson having his _navjote_ at the most sacred _Atash Behram_ in all of India. But then again, I suppose it does help having a world famous rock star for a son."

"Oh, wow! That's great!" Brian smiled. But there was only silence from Freddie and Mary's end of the table.

"Or not…," Roger said to him quietly.

"Papa, would you mind if we had a quick word?" Freddie asked at last.

"So, I suppose Freddie hasn't ever told you that we had the children christened in the Church of England when they were babies, then?" Mary interrupted before Bomi could say anything. Freddie shot her a disproving look.

Sheroo gasped.

"Whaaat?" Bomi asked disbelievingly, in little more than a whisper.

"Er, that broccoli from earlier sure was delicious," John suddenly commented nervously into the awkward silence that ensued, and Brian and Roger both agreed.

"Right. This discussion needs to be continued elsewhere," Freddie said firmly, standing up from his chair. Bomi, Jer, Kash, Mary, and Sheroo followed suit. After they'd left, Little Freddie came back and sank into his chair, deflated.

Freddie led them back towards the hotel until they were out of sight and earshot of the table, then stopped.

Bomi started in right away. "What is she talking about, Farrokh?" he asked. "Oh, please, tell me it's not true, son."

But Freddie made no move to deny it.

"How could you let this happen, Farrokh?!" Bomi demanded.

"What do you mean how could I let this happen?" Freddie said. "They're her children, too, you know."

"And you're their father! You could have put a stop to it!" Bomi objected.

"Look," Freddie said. "As far as I was concerned, if she wanted them christened in the church, then as their mother she had the right, and I wasn't opposed to it. Nor am I opposed to him having the fire ceremony. It's just that he's old enough now to decide for himself if that's what he wants to do or not."

"And why wasn't he allowed to choose for himself whether he wanted to be christened or not?" Bomi asked angrily.

"Will you calm down?" Freddie said to him. "Now come on this whole thing's getting rather ridiculous. It's like Mary said before. Children are christened when they're babies, so as his parents, we made that decision for him. But the fire ceremony doesn't take place until the child is older, old enough to decide for his or herself whether that's what they want to do or not. And if things had been the other way around and the fire ceremony took place when they were babies, then we probably would have done that. And if the christening took place when they were older, then I would still have wanted Freddie to make his own decision about whether he wanted to have that done or not. And if Freddie does want to have the fire ceremony done, then I'm perfectly fine with that, but it's got to be his decision. And anyway, just because he's been christened doesn't mean he has to follow the Church of England or anything like that. But if he decides later on that that is what he wants to do, then we've already taken the appropriate steps for him so that he can do that. But it's up to him."

But it was like Bomi hadn't listened to a word Freddie had said. "So the rumours we and your aunt have been hearing ARE true, then," he said coldly.

"What rumours?" Freddie asked.

"[That you've abandoned your faith, and converted to this...this ABOMINATION!](https://books.google.com/books?id=QHQjOWScIToC&pg=PA48&lpg=PA48&dq=freddie+mercury+%22converted+to+christianity%22&source=bl&ots=JfItDRMrgh&sig=ACfU3U3UqPWCKFXhmWokW694ExtALbfrYw&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiUqdST9IbpAhXKmq0KHVGzD5MQ6AEwBnoECAcQAQ#v=onepage&q=freddie%20mercury%20%22converted%20to%20christianity%22&f=false)" Bomi spat. There was silence for a moment, and then Freddie spoke.

"Papa, you know I haven't practiced for a long time now," Freddie said quietly. 

Mary stepped up and laid a hand on Freddie's arm. "Whatever Freddie's beliefs are, they're his own. He keeps them to himself instead of trying to shove them down other people's throat!" she said hotly. 

And that part was true. Freddie had his own beliefs from which he got comfort, and although he was not at all without faith, he never talked about religion in a group of friends, not even with Joe, Mary, Phoebe, or Jim, as he didn't want to sway others one way or another. He thought those sorts of things were personal and ought to be kept private, and weren't an appropriate topic for general conversation. Although Freddie himself supposed he couldn't help but to have been influenced by the surprising fact that all the schools his parents had ever sent him to were Christian schools. And at St. Peters', a Church of England school, all the boys had been required to attend Sunday mass and sing in the choir. So what exactly had his parents thought was going to happen? And he guessed if somebody cared to take the time, and were to look hard enough back into his past, there were clues he'd inadvertently left along the way. [ Like how his exam to pass his A levels which would get him into the Ealing College of Art and Technology was a painting of the Crucifixion. He painted Jesus nailed to the Cross and it was so well reviewed it did gain him entry to Ealing. ](http://flamingnose.blogspot.com/2019/01/?m=1) Or that many of the songs he'd written for the first Queen album such as [ Great King Rat](https://youtu.be/VHC85XWII7E), [ Jesus](https://youtu.be/z0J_kuTib1w), [ Liar](https://youtu.be/Wl96cYyMGbs), [ Mad The Swine](https://youtu.be/CdtIhHy-krw), and [ My Fairy King](https://youtu.be/VeVjEg4znQk), [ all contained varying degrees of references to God, Jesus, and the Bible](https://www.songfacts.com/facts/queen/jesus). But the only real definitive proof anyone could claim to have would perhaps be that sometimes at the end of concerts he would say, 'God bless you' to the audience, or how once during an interview with his reporter friend, David Wigg, [ he'd pointed upward and said 'He's looking after me'](https://youtu.be/8HN53Fo7CtY?t=2m9s). [ Or when Jim would be lying in bed beside him at night, and hear him praying](https://books.google.com/books?id=3CYWAwAAQBAJ&pg=PT317&lpg=PT317&dq=%22Freddie+didn%E2%80%99t+practise+Zoroastrianism%22&source=bl&ots=ySSQv6Clya&sig=ACfU3U1Df6xFkAvj1xAmvNzxIkq0ezpFAA&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjMmaHuhofpAhUEYawKHSrDDfAQ6AEwAHoECAIQAQ#v=onepage&q=%22Freddie%20didn%E2%80%99t%20practise%20Zoroastrianism%22&f=false). [ Jim would sometimes ask who he was talking to, and he’d just shrug and whisper, 'I’m saying my prayers.' ](https://kanashimi-no-belladonna.tumblr.com/post/31812080087/but-in-all-the-years-i-knew-him-he-never) And as far as Little Freddie and Kashmira went, he'd always tried to keep things very open, for this specific reason that the two sides of their family were of different religions - Mary and her parents members of The Church of England, and his parents Zoroastrians. He'd taught them to say their prayers at bedtime, and when they came to him with questions, he answered them the best way he knew how. But he also made sure they were taught not to judge others - we're all God's children; and to always be respectful of others' religious beliefs.

"Turn your back on your family name and your family heritage if it pleases you, Farrokh," Bomi said. "But this...this is unforgivable. You are dead to me now. You are no longer my son."

"Papa, please," Freddie pleaded. 

They were suddenly interrupted by Little Freddie and Jim's arrival on the scene - Little Freddie still carrying the apparel box from earlier, containing the _sedreh_ and _kushti_ , under one arm.

"Stop it! Just stop it, ok!" Little Freddie reached into his shirt with one hand, and pulled out a necklace. On its chain were a beautiful golden cross, and a _faravahar_ , the ancient symbol of the Zoroastrian faith - a bearded man with one hand reaching forward as he stands above a pair of wings that are outstretched from a circle representing eternity.

"Where did you get that?" Sheroo asked.

"Papa Jim made it for me," Little Freddie said.

Sheroo gasped.

"That's right, he's my Papa!" Little Freddie told her, and Jim rested his hand on his shoulder. The main part of the necklace was made from Jim's very own cross necklace he'd brought with him from Ireland, he being Catholic after all. And the Zoroastrian pendant he'd bought that very afternoon from the museum's gift shop and added it to the chain before gifting the necklace, which now represented both faiths, to Little Freddie. "I believe what Jesus said," Little Freddie told them. "But I believe what Zoroaster said, too. Why can't I have both?"

"Because it doesn't work that way!" Bomi and Mary both shouted at him at the same time.

"Fine!" Little Freddie told them with tears in his eyes. "If I can't have both, then I don't want either one!" He threw the box down, the pristine white garments spilling out onto the black sand. Then he reached up and yanked the necklace from his neck, throwing it down as well, before running away across the sand. Bomi rushed forward to rescue the clothing, blowing and brushing and shaking out the offending black sand.

"Well, congratulations," Freddie said. "I hope the two of you are proud of yourselves."

"Farrokh-" Bomi said

"Freddie-" Mary began

But Freddie cut them off.

"It's _Freddie._ And no! The both of you have had your say. Now it's my turn to talk, and you'd both damn well better listen," he said. "I am completely ashamed and disgusted with the both of you! Who do you think you are? How dare you treat him like that!" 

Bomi and Mary kept quiet, casting their eyes downward to avoid his gaze. 

"His happiness is very important to me," Freddie went on. "So if that means his having a fire ceremony or even a bar mitzvah, for God's sake, then I'll find him a bloody Rabbi! And no one's going to stop him, not even the two of you!"

Phoebe suddenly appeared at Freddie's shoulder. "Here you are." He handed Freddie a piece of paper with a list of local Jewish Rabbis. "Might I suggest Rabbi Ezekiel Isaac Malekar," he said, pointing to a name on the list. "I hear he makes a mean chocolate babka."

"Oh, thank you, dear," Freddie said.

"Of course!" Phoebe smiled, and then turned and headed back in the direction of the table.

"Wait..." Bomi said, mouth ajar, pointing after Phoebe. "How did he…?"

"The point is-" Freddie continued, folding up the piece of paper and putting it in his pocket. "The point is, I don't care what religion he decides to follow. He's my son, my little boy, and I'll fully support him and love him no matter what he chooses to believe. And if you really love him you will too," he told them. "You know, I guess most people think of God as a sort of caring, loving father. So, can you imagine if Freddie called me Daddy, but Kashmira decided to call me Papa, and I said to her, 'No, you're calling me by the wrong name, so I'm not listening to you. Go away!' I mean, can you imagine it? Can you imagine any decent father doing something like that? I can't. And I don't think _Ahura Mazda_ , or God, or Jesus, or Zoroaster, any of them would approve of anything that just happened here." Then he grew stern again. "Right. Now you listen to me, the both of you. I will not allow Freddie to be upset like this," he told them. "Fix it now. Otherwise the holiday ends here." And with that, Freddie turned on his heel and stormed off, with Jim in toe.

*******

Back at the table, it was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. Somebody coughed. 

Brian cleared his throat. "So…," he said, trying to break the nervous tension. "I guess we all had fun today, right? Getting to learn all about Freddie's ancestry and culture. Who knew Freddie's family came from such an interesting background!"

"Yeah. And I thought this was a lovely dinner," Roger added. "The food was wonderful."

"And the erm, decorations," John said. "They're very nice."

Just then Freddie and Jim reappeared.

"Oh, here he is!" Brian smiled. "Is everything alright, Freddie?" he asked quietly when Freddie came and sat down at the table.

But Freddie didn't answer. He merely tilted his head back and drained his glass of Chardonnay, which Brian supposed was an answer in and of itself.

*******

Mary bent down to retrieve the necklace. Luckily the chain wasn't broken, but had only come unclasped. She carefully studied the intricate _faravahar_ pendant in the palm of her hand. Then she sighed.

"I think it's time we put our differences aside, and focus on what's more important-" She lifted her eyes to look at Bomi "-the things we share in common."

Bomi looked back at her, a pained expression in his eyes, and nodded his head in agreement.

***BONUS* 1983 - Freddie Mercury with his godson 'Freddie Mack' (Reinhold Mack's son), on the day of his christening.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's true that Freddie's grandfather, Jer's father, was a very highly respected priest. You can read an interesting newspaper article from The Sunday London Times dated November 1996 that mentions it here: http://www.queenzone.com/forums/739833/sunday-times-article-about-freddies-childhood-interesting.aspx
> 
> P.S. The title for this chapter comes from the song My Sweet Lord by George Harrison of The Beatles. It's a song he wrote as a call to abandon religious sectarianism by blending Christianity & Hinduism together, which I think makes it a perfect theme song for this chapter. You can listen to it here on YouTube if you're interested: https://youtu.be/8qJTJNfzvr8


	12. Baptism By Fire

Bomi shook his head. _How had things gotten so out of hand?_

Jer came and laid a hand on Bomi and Mary's arm. "I think it's wonderful that Freddie wants to practice both of his family's religions," she said, looking from one to the other. "It just means he's that much closer to God."

Mary placed her hand on Jer's hand, and gave her an apologetic smile.

*******

Mary and Bomi found Little Freddie sitting alone on a rock farther down the beach, his face buried in his arms against his knees.

"Freddie…," Mary tried gently. 

"No! Just go away and leave me alone! I don't want to talk to anybody!" he cried. "I want Daddy and Papa Jim! I want to go home!"

Mary knelt down and placed a hand on his knee. "Darling, Dādā and I are both terribly sorry about what's happened," she said. "We understand if you're angry with us, and you've got the right. You know, Daddy was right. It should be up to you what religion you choose to follow. One, or both, or something completely different. It should be your decision," she told him. "Anyway, Dādā and I have both talked it over, and there isn't going to be any more fighting."

Little Freddie looked up then, tears in his eyes. "You promise?"

"We promise," Mary and Bomi said together, then looked at each other.

"Besides," Bomi said with a cough. "Any man who said 'Love thy neighbor as thyself' and 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you', must have been very wise. Perhaps you could tell me more about some of his other teachings."

"And 'Good thoughts. Good words. Good deeds.' is a message that I know would have made Jesus very happy," Mary said, refastening the necklace around Little Freddie's neck. "I'm sure Zoroaster had many more wonderful sayings, and I'd really love to hear them."

Little Freddie took the pendants in his hand, staring down at them, then looked up at his mother and grandfather who both smiled.

"I do want to have my fire ceremony," he told them. "But only under one condition - If when we go back home to London, I can also have my first communion and confirmation in the church. I've been studying for them every day."

"Of course, darling. Whatever you want," Mary smoothed his hair affectionately.

"But only if you'll come, too," Little Freddie turned to his grandfather.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," Bomi told him.

*******

Bomi, Little Freddie, Mary, and the others all returned to the table, Bomi with his arm around Little Freddie's shoulders.

"May I please have everyone's attention for a moment," Bomi said. "My grandson has an announcement he'd like to make."

"I'm going to have my _navjote_ fire ceremony in three days at the _Atash Behram_ in Udvada," Little Freddie told them. "And I'd like for you all to come."

There were cheers of congratulations all around. Freddie still looked quite cross about the whole affair, but he was satisfied that at least everything had been put back to rights.

"I'm not trying to ruin the good news or excitement or anything," Brian spoke up. "But I thought non-Parsis aren't allowed on the fire temple premises." 

It seemed they'd all forgotten about that. Little Freddie's face fell, along with Bomi's heart. Then Bomi looked up.

"Well, that's true," he said. "But I think I might have an idea for how you all can still participate in the ceremony…"

*******

The next two days were spent with Bomi walking Little Freddie through the ceremony and teaching him all the required prayers. It seemed like such a short amount of time to have to try and learn all of those things, but Freddie wasn't the least bit worried about it, to be honest. Little Freddie was a very intelligent little boy, and a fast learner, and he knew he'd do just fine.

They also made time for them all to sight-see and visit some of the various nearby places Freddie's mother and father remembered from their childhood and youth, both of them having lived and been brought up in Gujarat.

Finally the day of the ceremony arrived. There were only a few minutes before the cars were supposed to arrive to take them to Udvada, and Bomi couldn't find Freddie anywhere.

Brian and John were waiting together in the hallway outside their rooms.

"Well, you look quite nice!" Brian said when Roger walked up to them in his pale gray suit and black shirt. "Here, let me help you with that tie."

"I wasn't sure what outfit to pick," Roger said as Brian adjusted his tie, which was white. "What exactly does one wear to a fire ceremony?" It seemed the women had gotten off easy enough by wearing the elegant, vibrantly colored _gara_ _saris_ of hand-woven silk and fine embroidery - the traditional dress Zoroastrian Parsi women wore on special occasions.

"I'm sure what you've got on will be perfectly fine," Brian told him with a smile. Brian himself had on a nice shirt - white with black stripes, a black waistcoat (vest), and black trousers. And John was wearing a white collared shirt with a dark green tie that matched his trousers, and a black jacket.

Bomi passed them in the hallway. "Have you seen Farrokh?" he asked.

"No, sorry," Brian said. "But he's bound to be around here somewhere. I know he wouldn't miss this for anything."

Bomi thanked them and continued his search. He looked for quite some time, before eventually finding his son out on the balcony of his room. Dressed in a white shirt and white jeans, he stood with a cigarette and vodka tonic, staring out at the beach and ocean beyond. Freddie had already sent Jim down earlier.

"Aren't you coming?" Jim asked him, sitting on the end of the bed tying his dress shoes.

"You go on ahead, dear," Freddie had told him. "I'll be down in a little while."

"Oh, there you are," Bomi said. "The cars will be here soon, and there are a few things I thought you might like to go over in regards to the ceremony. Now-"

"I didn't know if I'd be allowed to take part in the ceremony," Freddie said. "I'm no longer a practicing Zoroastrian after all."

"Well, the priest doesn't know that," Bomi said. "Besides, you're still a Parsi, and you're still my son."

"Am I?" Freddie asked.

"Of course you are!" Bomi told him. Then he sighed. "Listen, Farrokh- er, I mean, _Freddie_ ," he quickly corrected himself. "I said some things the other night that I never meant, and that frankly, I'm ashamed of. I'm sorry, and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me." Freddie didn't turn around, merely took another drag on his cigarette and sip of his drink, but Bomi knew he was listening. "I'll be honest with you, I might not always agree with or like all the choices you make sometimes, but then again, what parent does? But it's just like what you said with Freddie - they're your decisions. And no matter what, you're still MY son, MY little boy, and I DO love you. Always. More than anything else in this whole world. And nothing will ever change that. Not ever. Even though I know it probably doesn't seem like it, and that's entirely my fault. I've never been good at showing affection, emotion. But it's the truth." Bomi stared at his son's back. "But in this case you were right - about letting Freddie decide for himself. You're a good father. Better than I ever was. I've done a lot of things I regret - like sending you away to that school so far away from your mother and Kash, and not being around enough when you were little. I was always away working, and I know I wasn't there for you the times when you needed me the most. I always put my work and your education first above everything else, and I can see now that that was a mistake. There are far more important things - like family and spending time together. I guess that's part of the reason why I was so excited about all of us going on this holiday together. It was sort of like I was getting a second chance, even though I know I don't deserve a second chance, mind you," he said. "But, now you see, as much as we hate to admit it, us parents or grandparents, we don't always get it right, despite our best intentions. And that's all I ever had for you - the best of intentions. I just wanted to give you the best possible start in life, and a good future...Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, we don't always know what's best. Sometimes we get it wrong. We mess up. You know-" he chuckled softly,"- I always wanted you to be a lawyer or an accountant, but for once I'm glad you didn't listen to me. And just look at you now. I know I don't tell you nearly enough, or perhaps I've never told you before, but...I'm proud of you. I'm proud to be your father, and I'm proud that you're my son. And I wouldn't change anything about you, or trade you for anyone else, even if I could. I really mean that."

Freddie just stayed the way he was.

"Son, look at me, please," Bomi pleaded. Only then did Freddie turn to face his father.

"Come here, _beta_." Bomi pulled him close. Wrapping his arms around him, he held him tight, as Freddie returned his embrace. "Oh, my boy. My boy."

Now, Freddie wasn't the crying type. Even when he was hurting and in pain, he would swear and curse, but never cry. And when Phoebe was given the unenviable task of plucking the hairs one by one from his back with tweezers before a show (poor Phoebe!) he never even flinched, not once. But though neither one of them would ever admit it, when they pulled apart from each other, it's possible that both their eyes might have been just the slightest bit damp.

Freddie coughed, clearing his throat. "So, what - What was it you wanted to go over with me about the ceremony?" he asked.

"Oh, that!" Bomi said dismissively with a wave of his hand. "I was just going to show you how to put the _sedreh_ tunic on Freddie, and how to tie the _kushti_ belt around it afterwards. But I'm afraid there's no time for that now. No worries though! We can talk about it in the car on the way," he smiled.

*******

The Parsi men, as it were, rode together in the first car - Bomi, Little Freddie, Freddie, and Sam, Kash's little boy. Then came the Parsi women - Jer, Kash, little Kasmira, Kash's daughter, Natalie, and Sheroo in the second car. Next in the third car were the non-Parsi men - Aarav, Brian, Javed, Jim, John, Phoebe, Reyansh, both Rogers, and their sons. And finally in the fourth car were the non-Parsi women - Mary and the other wives and their daughters.

On the way to Udvada, Bomi explained to Freddie, Little Freddie, and Sam the significance of the upcoming ceremony. Until now, at least in the Zoroastrian community, Freddie was considered accountable for all of Little Freddie's actions - both wrongful and righteous, because as his father, it was his responsibility to morally and religiously educate his child. But with the putting on of the _sedreh_ and _kushti_ , Little Freddie himself would now be the one responsible for his every thought, word, and deed, and be held accountable for them from this point on. Following the ceremony, he would be viewed as an adult and a fully-fledged member of the Zoroastrian community, with all of the rewards and repercussions that entailed. Then he instructed Freddie on the putting on of the _sedreh_ and _kushti_.

"At a certain point in the ceremony, when the priest and his assistants begin their prayers, you'll slip the _sedreh_ onto Freddie's forearms, like so-" Bomi showed him using an extra tunic, "-and as they are finishing their prayers you'll finish putting it on him. Then they will begin another set of prayers, and you'll tie the _kushti_ around him. You'll put the _kushti_ around his waist, pass the two ends behind his back, then bring them back to the front. You make a double knot at the waist in front, then make another double knot at the back, and let the two ends hang down behind," he said, finishing the demonstration. "You see? It's just as easy as that."

Freddie thought he had never been more confused about anything in his whole life. But he hid it well.

"Right," he said with a resolute nod.

When the cars pulled up in front of the _Atash Behram_ , they all got out and congregated in front of the gates. Bomi held open one side of the gate so he, Freddie, Little Freddie, and the other family members could pass through. Everyone else who wasn't Parsi, including Mary, would, unfortunately, have to wait outside.

"Good luck Freddie and, uh...Freddie," Brian smiled before they went in the gates. "I just wanted to say, we're all very proud of you, and we know you're going to do great."

"Thank you, Mr. May," Little Freddie answered politely. They could all tell he was very nervous.

"Thanks, Brian," Freddie said. He put his arm around Little Freddie's shoulders and they went in through the gates together.

Upon entering the _Atash Behram_ , they were greeted by the priest, who led them to a bathroom within walking distance of the initiation area. Outside the threshold of the bathroom was a white, powdered chalk design, called _chuna_ or _rangoli_ , as well as a string of tuberose flowers on the upper frame of the door called a _toran_ , for good luck. Here Little Freddie was to have a ritual cleansing bath called _nahan_ , using consecrated water from the well of the fire temple. But first came the _nirangdin._ Whereas the _nahan_ was for outward cleanliness, the _nirandin_ was for inward, spiritual purity. Little Freddie recited the _baj_ prayer, and then was given a pomegranate leaf to chew. After removing the chewed leaf, a small metal container was placed to his lips and he was given a sip of a special drink called _nirang_. Made from a liquid called _taro_ , it contained a pinch of the _bhasam_ , the consecrated ash from a fire at the fire-temple. Next, Little Freddie and the priest together recited the prayers of repentance, the _patet_ , at the conclusion of which the priest left the bathroom and stood outside the door while Little Freddie bathed. After the bath, he was given new clothes to change into - a pair of loose fitting white trouser resembling pyjamas, a shawl which was wrapped over his shoulders, back and chest, and a prayer cap.

Then Jer came to accompany her grandson on the ceremonial walk from the bathroom to the initiation area. She carried with her an absolutely enormous tray called a _sace_ or _ses_ containing the symbolic utensils (including a lighted lamp burning with clarified butter, and a fire burning on a censer with fragrant sandalwood and frankincense), two coconuts and shredded coconut pieces, roses, a garland (white and red flowers, with marigolds and mango leaves interspaced), a few pieces of _patasa_ (sugar candy), rice, a raw egg, a container of rose-water, betel leaves, betel nuts, dates, yoghurt, a metallic cup containing _kunkun_ (a red powder paste), unshelled almonds, pomegranate, pistachio nuts, raisins, a few gold and silver coins and Rupees, and the _sedreh_ and _kushti_ Bomi had handed down to him.

Just before the initiation area, Jer set the tray down, and began the _achu michu_ ritual to cloak him in an aura of protection against evil and the evil eye. First, she took some of the red powder paste, and made a long mark on Little Freddie's forehead called a _tila_ , representing a third, spiritual eye. Then she took a little of the rice and pressed it onto the wet paste, to which the rice adhered. Next, she took the raw egg from the tray, and holding it in her right hand supported at the elbow with her left hand, she circled her hand and egg around Little Freddie's head - six times in a clockwise motion, and once in an anti-clockwise motion, for a total of seven circles after which she broke the egg on the stone tiles beside his feet, symbolically destroying any collected evil, or as some believed - the evil eye. The procedure was then repeated with one of the coconuts, which was also smashed on the ground. Next, all of the items were removed from the tray except a little of the rice, betel leaves, betel nuts, and dates. Then, holding the tray, she walked a circle around Little Freddie seven times, and the contents of the tray were cast aside. Finally, she poured the rose-water into the now empty tray, which was circled seven times as before, after which she sprinkled the rose-water on both sides of Little Freddie. As the last part of the ritual, she dipped a piece of the _patasa_ sugar candy in the yoghurt, and placed it in Little Freddie's mouth, to remind him to always speak sweet words. Then she took some of the rice and showered it over his head as a blessing, accompanied with wishes for health, happiness, and contentment. Little Freddie bent down to touch his grandmother's feet as a gesture of thanks, humility and respect. Jer then reached down, and taking him gently by the upper arm, she pulled him into a hug, thus ending the _achu michu_ ritual.

Now it was time for the main part of the ceremony. They entered the initiation area, which was decorated with strings of flowers. The floor was covered with a white sheet called a _sofreh_. Here the priest sat with his back to a window, the bright morning sunshine streaming in behind him and filling the room with light. Little Freddie sat facing him on a low stool called a _patlo_ , also covered with a white sheet. And on either side of him sat the priest's two assistants, one of whom attended a small fire, brought from the larger holy flame, as all Zoroastrian rituals took place in the presence of fire. Jer brought the tray, which had been refilled with the unused items from earlier, along with the _sedreh_ and _kushti_ , and set it beside Little Freddie. Then she and the other family members took their seats to watch the ceremony; except Bomi and Freddie, who stood off to the side nearby.

One of the assistants, the one not attending the fire, handed Freddie the _sedreh_. He came forward and slipped it onto Little Freddie's forearms, just like Bomi had shown him earlier in the car, then stepped back. The priest and Little Freddie repeated the _patet_ prayers of repentance. Afterwards, they rose to stand facing one another, and Little Freddie made the _Din No Kalmo_ \- the Zoroastrian Declaration of Faith. He was required to say it three times, finishing with the _Ashem Vohu_ prayer. He and the priest then recited the _Ahunwar_ prayer together. Then the assistant motioned to Freddie, and he came over and finished putting the _sedreh_ on Little Freddie. The priest came to stand behind Little Freddie, and as they both faced the sun, they said the _Hurmuzd Yasht_ prayer together. 

Then as the priest began the _Hormazd Khodai_ and _Jasme Avangeh Mazda_ prayers, the assistant handed Freddie the _kushti_. He stared down helplessly at the two ends of the belt in his hands. _Oh fuck. How the hell had his father told him to tie this damn thing?_

"Daddy?" Little Freddie looked back at him expectantly.

"Right," Freddie said, determined. _First, you put it around the waist...Yes, that seemed alright...Ok, now what came next? Over the left shoulder? No, no, no, that wasn't right. Or was it under the right leg first, and then around the waist? No, that wasn't right either. Shit._

"Daddy?" Little Freddie asked again, this time a bit nervously.

"Hang on, hang on," Freddie told him. _And wasn't there something about tying? One knot in the front, and two in the back? Or maybe it was the other way around - one in the back and two in the front? Oh, God damn it!_

Little Freddie stood there wide-eyed but silent as his father tied him up like a Christmas ham. 

Jer's jaw literally dropped open at the spectacle, while Kash covered her mouth with both hands, tears of laughter pricking at her eyes. And Sheroo was in complete and total shock. Bomi, who had glanced away for just a moment, suddenly noticed the looks on their faces.

"What?" he mouthed, confused by their reaction. Jer jerked her head to the side, and Bomi turned to see the unfolding catastrophe. He gasped, and rushed over just as the assistant was heading in Freddie's direction, a bemused, questioning look on his face.

Freddie was at his wit's end, completely beside himself, when he felt a hand gently touch his own. He looked over to see his father who smiled at him warmly. He carefully disentangled his grandson, then guided Freddie in tying the _kushti_ \- properly this time. He tied a double knot in the front upon hearing the word _shyaothenanam_ (good actions) during the recitation of two more _Ahunwar_ prayers, thus showing that the tying of the _kushti_ was in itself a good action performed for _Ahura Mazda_ (Wise Lord); then another double knot in the back during the final _Ashem Vohu_ prayer.

Thus clothed with _sedreh_ and _kushti_ , Little Freddie and the priest recited together the _Fravarane_ \- The Zoroastrian Articles of Faith.

After that, the only remaining part of the ceremony was the benediction. Little Freddie was seated and his shawl wrapped around him once more. The priest reapplied more of the red powder paste and rice to the _tila_ mark his grandmother had made earlier on his forehead. Then he took the garland of flowers from the tray and put it around Little Freddie's neck, and in his hands he placed the other coconut, the roses, betel-nut leaves, betel nuts, the _patasa_ sugar candy, a little of the rice, the metallic cup containing the _kanku_ red powder paste, and the gold and silver coins and Rupees. The priest recited the final prayer - the _Tandarosti_ , invoking the blessings and good wishes of God for health and well-being, and as he did so, he sprinkled Little Freddie with a mixture of rice, rose petals, pomegranate, shredded coconut, raisins, and almonds, figuratively showering him with good fortune.

Now that ceremony had ended, the priest was paid his fees, and given the remaining rice as a gift.

Little Freddie put his other clothes back on over the ceremonial undergarments, and as his family came up to him to congratulate him, he handed them each one of the roses, as a thanks for being his guests. As he gave his sister, little Kashmira, her flower, he bent down and kissed her on the cheek. "One day it'll be your turn," he told her.

***

The others had been waiting anxiously outside, but when they saw Little Freddie and the rest of them emerge from the doors of the _Atash Behram_ , they all cheered. And when they approached the gates, they threw more of the mixture of rice, rose petals, pomegranate, shredded coconut, raisins, and almonds on them from little packets Bomi had made and given to them before the ceremony. Little Freddie was all smiles as he handed out the rest of his roses among them.

*******

When they returned to their hotel in Valsad, they had lunch on the beach. But this time there was no arguing or fighting, only joy and happiness. It was the celebration Bomi had always dreamed of.

And because it was such a special occasion, lunch consisted of _Gujarati Thali_ served the traditional way - using banana leaves as disposable plates.

And during dessert, Little Freddie was given many wonderful gifts, including envelopes with cash, _Kondapalli_ toys, some other toy animals carved from sandalwood, and _Rajasthani_ puppets.

*******

Later that night, Freddie and Jim lay in bed together.

"I've learnt a lot on this trip," Freddie said. "And no, it most certainly wasn't how to tie that damn _kushti_ belt, I tell ya," he joked, making Jim laugh. He'd already told Jim all about his little fiasco from earlier. Then he grew serious, and rolled over to face Jim. "It's that there's no other man I'd want to help me raise my children...or spend the rest of my life with," he said. "I can't thank you enough for all that you've done for me and the children these past months. You know, I've got enough money, I could buy you the whole world over, but it still wouldn't be enough."

"I don't want all that stuff," Jim said. "There's only one thing I want."

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"I just want you," he said.

"Well, you've got me, dear," Freddie told him.

Jim reached over then to stroke Freddie's face. "And that's payment enough."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to learn more about the navjote fire ceremony and see some pictures and videos, here are some links below:
> 
> 1\. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Navjote
> 
> 2\. http://www.avesta.org/ritual/navjote.htm
> 
> 3\. http://www.heritageinstitute.com/zoroastrianism/navjote/index.htm
> 
> 4\. http://m.pluralism.org/religion/zoroastrianism/initiation
> 
> 5\. YouTube Video of navjote ceremony - https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vvifDEq_1sU
> 
> 6\. YouTube Video showing how to tie the kushti belt - https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LhqsCa6GUpk


	13. Āvajō (Goodbye), India!

The next day they left Valsad to return to Bombay, where they said goodbye to Freddie's Aunt Sheroo. As a parting gift, Freddie gave her a beautiful white Mekhela Chador saree made from Assam silk, with elaborate gold and silver embroidery.

Sheroo hugged him tight. "Thank you, Freddie. For everything." She wiped her eyes. "You must write more often! Maybe you could even write me a letter of your own sometime instead of making Mary do all the hard work," she mock-scolded, with a playful smack to his chest. "Or call. Mary has my number, you know." Freddie promised to stay in closer touch. "And you-" she said, turning to Little Freddie. "I've got my eye on you, young man."

Roger had to smother a laugh. _Hopefully, it's her good eye_ , he thought to himself. Then he felt terrible for thinking such a thing, but all the same it was rather amusing.

"You're going places. Keep up the hard work and practice all you can, and I know you're going to go far. One day you're going to stun this world - just like your father," Sheroo told her great-nephew. 

"Thank you, Auntie Sheroo," Little Freddie replied politely, with a shy smile.

"It was nice to meet all of you," Sheroo said to the others. "It's good to know Freddie has so many wonderful friends looking after him." Then she motioned to Freddie and Jim, putting an arm around each one of them. "Freddie, Jim," she began. "I'm sorry about the way I reacted when I found out that - well, that Jim is more than just the gardener! It was just a bit - surprising and unexpected. But, now that we've met properly, I'm looking forward to getting to know each other. Anyone can tell that the two of you love each other deeply, and the children." She looked over at Jim. "Freddie and the children are blessed to have you in their lives. And one day...one day, when there's a wedding - I'd better get an invitation!" she laughed.

*******

They spent the night in Bombay, with a non-stop flight back to London's Heathrow Airport the next morning. But before leaving for the airport, Freddie called Javed, Aarav, and Reyansh into his and Jim's room. He had gifts for all of them.

"A little something to remember me by," he said, handing Javed a large wrapped box. "Well, besides the- you know," he motioned at Javed's derrière, and they both laughed.

"Oh, don't remind me." Javed unwrapped and opened the box to reveal a set of Aipan folders and files. 

"For all your documents and papers, dear," Freddie told him with a smile.

"Thank you. They're beautiful," Javed said, running his hand over the intricate designs on their surface.

Next were Aarav and Reyansh.

"Here you are. This is for you," Freddie said, passing them each their own gift, "As a thank you for looking after me so well. And for keeping our arses out of trouble. Well, except for his," he jerked his thumb at Javed, and they all had a good laugh.

Aarav was given an elegant brass tea set that Freddie was told had been made in Moradabad of Uttar Pradesh.

Reyansh had to laugh again when he saw his gift. He'd told them all how his wife was forever nagging him to stop eating so many sweets. So Freddie had gotten him a _mithai_ box in disguise, with a false bottom for hiding his sweets from the prying eyes of his wife.

They all thanked him again for their gifts.

"Well, you deserve it, darlings. That and more. You helped me give my parents something they've been dreaming about for a long time. No one else could have done better. And if I ever come back, I'd want it to be the three of you again. I don't want anybody else," Freddie told them. "Though I think we'll skip Zanzibar next time if it's all the same to you, dear," Freddie said to Javed, with a small laugh. "And who knows? Maybe one day Queen will come back to India and play a few shows. But until then, you know, we've had a good time," he told them with a nod.

*******

Then they were off to the airport. Just before going inside, Freddie reached down to take his children's hands. Little Freddie balked.

"Daddy!" he hissed in a whisper, pulling his hand away. "I'm a man now," he said, looking up at his father.

"That may be," Freddie said. "But you're still my little boy." Once again, Freddie was reminded that his son was growing up, and one day he _would_ have to let go - literally and metaphorically. But he wasn't ready for that quite yet. However, for Little Freddie's sake (just this one time!), he settled for an arm around the shoulders instead. He pulled him close and gave him a kiss on the head.

Javed, Aarav, and Reyansh accompanied them as far as they could, and then stopped. Freddie shook their hands.

"Until next time," he said with a wink. Then he turned and continued on. But just before disappearing from view, he turned around and gave them a final two-finger salute goodbye.

Aarav returned the gesture. "Good-bye my friend," he said.

*******

After taking their seats in first-class, Roger turned to Freddie across the aisle.

"You know, something? These last few days, and everything that's happened with Little Freddie, has really inspired me. I started working on this song last night. See what you think," he passed a sheet of hand-written lyrics over to Freddie. "The lyrics are half nicked off Martin Luther King's famous speech. It's all about acceptance, and peace, and tolerance, and unity, things like that…I was thinking of calling it One Vision."

Freddie scanned the lyrics. "That's quite good. I think you've really got something here. It's got a lot of potential," he said. "It'll give us something to work in when we go back into the studio in September."

*******

A grueling thirteen hours and forty minutes later they finally touched down at London's Heathrow Airport.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," Brian said after they'd made it through customs and immigration. "Mr. and Mrs. Bulsara, Freddie, Kash, thank you for letting us intrude on your family holiday," he smiled. "It truly was a once in a lifetime experience. I know I'll treasure all the memories to my dying day." _And Brian wondered why they always made him the spokesperson of the group._

"Well, thank you for coming," Freddie told him. "It wouldn't have been the same without my family - all of my family here with me."

They all hugged and then parted ways.

*******

Freddie also said goodbye to his sister, and parents, who had insisted on driving themselves to and from the airport. Thankfully, Terry was ready and waiting with Freddie's car already pulled up to the kerb at Arrivals to retrieve the rest of them. A short thirty minutes later, they arrived home to Garden Lodge at precisely 5:00 P.M. Before exiting the vehicle however, Freddie handed a long, rectangular box to Terry.

"I haven't forgotten about you either, dear," Freddie told him.

Inside the box was a luxurious Mysore silk tie.

By the time they made it through the garden and up to the front stoop, they were all on their knees with exhaustion, but as they came in the door, they were met by a sight that definitely lifted their spirits and had them all laughing.

Joe and the cats all had party hats on and stood together beneath a large banner that read - WELCOME HOME!

"Welcome home!" he shouted, blowing his party horn, and pulling the string on a party popper, releasing confetti into the air. As soon as they saw Freddie, the cats began mewing excitedly and ran towards him.

"Do you realize how long that took me?" Joe said.

"Delilah! Goliath!" Little Freddie and Kashmira cried, kneeling down to take their favorite cats in their arms.

"Hello, my babies! Daddy's home!" Freddie fawned over them. "How are my babies? Daddy's missed you all terribly! Have you been well-behaved for Liza since Daddy's been gone?" The cats, of course, only squeaked happily in reply. Then there were even more presents to open, because there was no way Freddie could leave his babies out. "I've brought you each back a little something," he said, giving each of them their very own catnip filled toy.

"Spoiled things," Joe said, looking down at them and shaking his head. It seemed the cats had gotten a new mother since Freddie had been gone. "I'll have you know, since the moment you left, I've had ten cats following me everywhere I go - sleeping on my bed at night, following me into the loo and staring at me whilst I have a pee, begging me for food every time I make a sandwich in the kitchen…"

Freddie only laughed. "Liza, darling, I've got a present for you too, dear," he said, rummaging in his bag. He happened to look over at the wall, and noticed the, ahem, "shag" rug, which had been shipped on ahead with some of the other purchases, had arrived. "Oh, I see the 'shag' rug's been delivered," he said, winking at Jim. And Joe was certain he did not want to know why Freddie had said _shag_ like that, or what that wink at Jim meant. "Here you are, dear," Freddie said at last, handing Joe the wrapped gift.

Joe carefully removed the paper to reveal a brand new cookbook of authentic, easy-to-prepare recipes from all across India, written by one of the most prominent contemporary authorities on Indian cooking (according to the cover). He was simply delighted. What with his being a professional gourmet chef, cooking was one of his life's greatest passions. It seemed Freddie always put a lot of thought into the gifts he gave others. "Thank you, Freddie," he smiled. "This should come in quite handy in the kitchen. It'll be great fun trying out some new recipes for a change."

Then they sat down on the sofa, and Freddie regaled Joe with stories from their holiday, with lots of laughter from all parties. He showed him a photo album with pictures that had been taken using his beloved Polaroid instant camera. Most of the pictures had been taken by Phoebe or Javed, as unofficial documenters of the trip, but it was easy to see which ones had been taken by Freddie himself, as they were all wildly out of focus.

"What's this supposed to be here, then? A cow? And this?" Joe asked, taking the Mickey out Freddie for his terrible photography. "Were Little Freddie and Kash playing around with the camera? I think I know who took these pictures…"

Freddie laughed. "You know somewhere else I've always wanted to go? Japan!" he said. "Of course the boys and I have been there on tour. But it's not the same as going there as a tourist on holiday." He turned to Phoebe. "Phoebe, darling, do you think you could-"

Phoebe put a hand to his head. "Oy vey!"

**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, a heartfelt thanks to Lorie1483 for the beautiful idea for this story. I have had so much fun writing it, and have truly enjoyed every minute. You're the best :)
> 
> A very special thanks also to QueenEmpath who helped me out tremendously with information and ideas about India. I really appreciate your input :)
> 
> And of course thank you so much to everyone for reading and for all the kind comments, kudos, and support along the way. It means a lot to me and I really appreciate it. I hope you've all enjoyed it. :)

**Author's Note:**

> I would really appreciate no criticism (constructive or otherwise), or negativity in the comments section, please. This is just my hobby that I do for fun. Thank you! :)
> 
> Copyright © May 20, 2020 DonnieTheFu All Rights Reserved
> 
> ***DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Any semblance between original characters and real persons, living or dead, is coincidental. The author in no way represents the companies, corporations, or brands mentioned in this work. The likeness of historical/famous figures have been used fictitiously; the author does not speak for or represent these people. All opinions expressed in this work are the author’s, or fictional.***


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